Page 100 of Promising You
“Ava’s not the past. She’s acting like she’s back with Garret. And if I wasn’t around, she probably would be.”
“Garret’s not interested in her. You know that, Jade. You also know that he loves you more than anything. So you need to stop being mad at him about this and just let it go.”
There’s a knock on the door and she gets up to answer it. Garret is standing there holding a piece of paper that’s been folded in half.
“Ready to talk?” His voice lacks any kind of emotion and I don’t know how to interrupt that. His body is angled in the direction of my room like he wants to hurry up and get this over with, or more likely just leave and not do this at all.
I hesitate, but Harper gives me her talk-to-him-or-else look, so I get up and Garret and I go back to my room.
We stand next to my desk and he offers me the piece of paper. As I take it, he holds onto it. “You sure you want to do this?”
I don’t answer, because truthfully I’m not sure. This was probably a really stupid request and I’m sure I’ll regret it later. But knowing that doesn’t stop me from taking the sheet of paper.
I unfold it and find a long list of names. I quickly count them. Sixteen. He’s been with 16 girls, not counting me.
My stomach knots as I review the names. Ava is third on the list and was also the third girl he slept with. I wonder if the whole list is chronologically ordered. How would he even remember the order? Sixteen girls? That’s a lot to remember. As I scan the names I don’t recognize any of them except Ava. Until I spot the very last name on the list. Sadie Sinclair. My half sister.
CHAPTERTWENTY-FIVE
I dropthe sheet of paper on my desk. “That’s a lot.”
“You feel better now?” Garret’s tone is a mix of anger and annoyance but mostly anger.
“No. You were right. I feel worse.”
He walks past me to the door. “Let me know when this is over, Jade.” He leaves, shutting the door behind him.
I’m not sure what just happened. Or what Garret meant just now. Let him know when it’s over? When what’s over? Our fight? Or us?
Shit! What did I just do? Did I just destroy our relationship? Over Ava? Over that list? Why did I even ask for it? Why does it matter? Harper was right. It’s the past. Garret’s withmenow, not Ava. Not any of the girls on that list.
I pick up the piece of paper and notice that some of the girls don’t have last names. Garret was probably too drunk to even remember their last names. Like he said, he was a different person back then. So why am I so obsessed with the Garret I never knew when the Garret I know and love is right here?
My eyes stop and stare at the last name on the list. Sadie Sinclair. I assumed he had sex with her, but this just confirms it. Did I really need to know that? What Garret said is true. Knowing this doesn’t help. It hurts. He’s mine now and it hurts knowing that he’s been with these other girls. So why the hell did I demand to know about them?
* * *
The next coupledays go by and I don’t hear anything from Garret. Not a phone call. Not a text. I don’t even see him in the dining hall. The ball is inmycourt now and he’s waiting for me to do something, but for some reason I don’t.
The longer we go without talking the more stubborn I get. He’s the one who walked out on me and left me wondering what he meant with those cryptic last words. So the ball should be inhiscourt. He should be coming to me.
Harper disagrees and lectures me at dinner Thursday night. “Jade, you’ve gotta end this. Just go up to his room and talk it out.”
“I can’t. I don’t know what to say. And why should I have to apologize for making him tell the truth? He should trust me enough to be honest with me.”
“Yeah, and hewashonest and look what happened. You’re miserable.”
“But what if this is a pattern? Think about all that stuff last semester that he didn’t tell me.”
“So you’ve never kept things from him? You’ve told him everything about your past?”
“Well, no. Not everything.” Actually I’ve told him very little about my past, mainly because I don’t want him feeling sorry for me.
“Then you’re not being fair. You can’t expect him to do things you aren’t willing to do yourself. That’s selfish. And immature.”
“What the hell, Harper? Why are you sticking up for him instead of me?”
“I’m just calling you on your shit because you’re obviously too stubborn to admit when you’re wrong. You never should’ve asked for that list. And you shouldn’t be punishing him for stuff he did years ago, before he even met you. Garret’s done a lot for you, Jade, and I don’t think you’re treating him very well.”
