You need to dry your hair. If you didn’t keep it so long—
Wow, my inner voice was extra snarky tonight. Generally, he tended to stay in the recesses of my mind—only making appearances when I was in doubt of something.
I’d seen a lot of him lately. Not so much about cases and clients. No, he’d been snarking about how I should’ve seen Thea’s infidelity a mile away. How I should’ve anticipated the demise of my marriage much sooner. How I should’ve prepared better for this eventuality.
Not all marriages end in divorce.
Case in point—my siblings. Not a divorce among them. Nor with my parents or either set of grandparents. When a Chamberlain mated, they did so for life.
Except me.
A shiver wracked through me.
I angled myself to search the cabinets under the sink, and I located a hairdryer. The rest was simple. Well, sort of. I used one arm to grip the counter while the other held the hairdryer. After an inordinate amount of time, most of my hair was dry. Back to that shiny-blond color people paid hairdressers a lot of money to replicate.
My wife had always resented me for that. Perhaps that was why I grew it long—to spite her.
That’s not nice.
Neither was she. But I’d push that aside and work harder to be a worthier person. I wasn’t going to let this unamicable parting make me bitter. Hell, I was better off without her. Knowing now, while I still had some good years left on me, was a blessing.
Or so you tell yourself.
I tucked the hairdryer back under the sink. I grabbed a fresh towel to drape over my pillow, turned off the light, and headed for bed. Although I was a little thirsty, I wasn’t going to head back to the bathroom for a glass of water, and the stocked mini-fridge was just too far away. Plus, anything caffeinated or alcoholic likely wouldn’t be good for me at this point.
As planned, after I laid the towel across the pillow, I slid between the sheets.
Should’ve brushed your hair. It’ll be tangled in the morning.
I sighed. Yes, my snarky inner voice was right. Still, the thought of rising and making my way across the room was too much to contemplate. I’d be fine. My hair would survive. So I turned off the light and told myself to sleep.
Only sleep was slow in coming. My heart rate was back to normal, and the chest pain was gone—
Chest pain? And you didn’t call an ambulance because…?
Because I’m in perfect health. Because I’m in peak fitness. Because I’m not going to die in a hospital.
Right. Better to say I wasn’t going to die at all.
Because you haven’t changed your will, and Thea will get everything.
Fucking hell.
With some effort, I turned onto my side so I could grab my phone. When the screen illuminated, I entered my password. Then I tapped until I was at my to-do list. I enteredchange willat the top and pushed everything down. Nothing else mattered.
Nothing.
Sure, you tell yourself you’re not bitter—
Because I wasn’t. Just…if someone was going to inheritmyshare ofmywealth upon my death, I wanted it to be my nieces and nephews. Life was tough enough these days for kids starting out. My family had the means to help each child, but a little extra from their favorite uncle Archer would go a long way to giving them a head start. Part of me railed against this—felt they needed to make their own way in the world.
The rest of me understood that Vancouver’s real estate market was vicious, and if any or all of them wanted to stay in the Lower Mainland, they’d need help to get started.
I could give them that help. Planned to anyway, even if I lived.
You’re going to live. That’s just an end of the discussion.
Except, flashing back to the episode in the shower, I wasn’t as convinced as I would’ve been, say, when I’d arrived here.
