Page 111 of This Time Around
“Hmm.”
That hum of his sent delightful little shivers down my back and I twisted in his hold, my hands sliding down his arms.“Hmm?”
“Yeah…I can think of other things I’d like to have wet, though.”
My fingers landed on his biceps and pressed in.They were wet from the rain, and my grip slipped.Cooper was never hesitant, never shy to share exactly how much he wanted me or enjoyed me.He pressed against me and my butt hit the table.Then his hands were on my hips, and I was on the table, legs spreading as he kept advancing.
“What are you doing?”I asked, already seeing his intent clear in the sharp line of his jaw, the gleam in his eyes.My hands slid up to his neck and I pulled him toward me.
Screw the questions and the fear and the three-inch thick envelope on the counter in my peripheral vision.
“If you have to ask,” he said, “I must be doing something wrong.”
My fingers dug into the back of his neck and I brought him closer, his lips to mine.“No.You’re doing everything right.”
“Yeah?”His brows arched, the lust-filled expression on his face softened to something else so much more beautiful…so sweet…my heart ached.
“Yeah.”I sighed against his mouth and pressed mine to his.And then there were no more words, but clothes flying every which way, my naked back against the wood table.
The feel of him inside of me.
The groans from our pleasure and the release of our climaxes as we reached them simultaneously.Then there was the labored breathing, his chest against mine, his coarse hair tickling my nipples, the weight of his body pressing against me.My hands drifting languidly up and down his back, over every bunch of his muscles, the dip down his spine.
“I love you,” he whispered in my ear.
And there was the envelope.Still visible.
A heavy weight lodged in my throat.“I know you do.”
His forehead pressed to mine, the warmth of his breath fell across my cheek.“Right.”
All the warmth of my release, our connection, and the feel of his body left me.
He pushed off me and bent, snagged his jeans.He walked away from me naked, jeans in one hand and shoulders slumped with the weight of my rejection.
Naked and still lying on the table, I slapped my hands over my face as tears dripped down my cheeks.“Shit.”
I was at the kitchen counter when he returned to the kitchen.His presence, the feel of him, the knowing he was watching me while I washed dishes sent a thrill through me.I’d hurt him deeply.He hadn’t hidden that from me before he left the room and any courage I had to tell him what I’d been thinking earlier evaporated.
Love didn’t have to be so hard.Falling in love with him had been easy, a gentle roll that tumbled me upside down until it was too late to stop it.But keeping that love alive…that was when the work began.That was what I couldn’t find the strength to gather in my hands and reach for.I’d loved and lost and been burned and hurt to depths I didn’t think I’d ever be able to drag myself out of.Willingly risking it again sent a flash of panic racing through me.
“I’m going to take care of the stuff I picked up earlier,” Cooper said.His voice was deep and rough, strained and tight.“I forgot about the food.”
He huffed a laugh, but it wasn’t exactly thrilled.More sad than anything.Still, my cheeks heated.He’d lost control because of me, and I still couldn’t give him what he needed or wanted from me.
I scrubbed a bowl even though I’d been scrubbing it since I felt him enter.I was also pretty sure the bowl had been clean before I even started.“Okay.”
His heavy sigh practically echoed in the kitchen and he moved toward the door.I twisted, my eyes on him as he bent and tugged on boots.He was wearing the jeans he had on earlier, but he’d thrown on a clean, light blue T-shirt.It set off his tan and his dark features in the most appealing way.
“Cooper,” I said and his chin tilted.That clog in my throat thickened again and I squeezed my eyes shut.
“I know, Rebecca.I know.”
And, God.If those two words hurt him even as half as much as that hurt me when I said it to him, I had to have absolutely gutted him.
It certainly felt like I’d just been slashed from throat to belly with a filet knife.
I was still staring at the spot where he stood, long after he closed the door and headed to the truck.
Defeat stamped all over him.
