Page 13 of Desperate Haste
“Of course I can, boss.” I fist bump his hand. “You take care now, okay? If you need me for anything just call.” He waves me off with a soft smirk and shuffles back inside. I watch him go for a minute, making sure he gets back to his chair, before turning around and moving for my truck once more.
* * *
I’m halfwaythrough reading an old decrepit copy of The Jungle by Uptown Sinclair that I swiped out of a little free library near the bar when I hear my phone buzz from the stack of books next to the couch. Finishing my page, I turn the book over my knee and check my phone only to see the group chat I have with my friends is lighting up like a goddamn Christmas tree.
Dungeons & Dickheads: 3 new messages
Kolbi:
Halloween’s in two weeks, do we have plans yet? Magnolia is asking if we’re doing anything to celebrate and I wasn’t sure if y’all wanted to go out with us or not.
She’s still struggling with everything going on with her parents, so I think it would be good for her to go out and have some fun.
Connie:
You know I love a good party.
Not But if everyone else is down I’ll go.
Hank:
Okay well now I can’t hear because Bailey just squealed so loud when I asked if she wanted to do something. You fuckers need to dress up because there’s no way my wife is going to let me get away with not doing some sort of couples thing.
You dickwads could come to the bar. We’re doing a fundraiser for Creighton’s House that night – I have to close so that’s where I’ll be.
I proposed the idea to Marshall a few weeks ago to do some kind of fundraiser once a year in order to support local recovery programs. He was completely on board with the idea and after some research, I reached out to a local center called Creighton’s House which supports young people in starting and maintaining their recovery journey.
Kolbi:
I think that’s great, brother. Let’s all go and hangout at Butcher and Block for the night. Hank, I mentioned dressing up to Magnolia and she’s already shopping so you won’t be alone in that.
Hank:
Yeah she texted Bailey asking what we’re wearing already lol
Connie:
I will *not* be dressing up.
Hank:
Too late dude, Bailey’s already talking about what she’s ordering for you. I think she mentioned some sort of hotdog suit? Something about how you’re a big weiner?
HAHAHAHAHAHA I knew I loved that girl.
Connie:
I’ll stay home then, thanks.
Kolbi:
Oh don’t be such a tightwad Conrad. You’ll go out and you’ll have a good time. Malcolm is doing a good thing here and we will support him in it.
My friends have been an integral part of my recovery journey so they know how important places like Creighton’s House are to me. If it weren’t for the three of them, I would never have gotten help in the first place. By the time they realized what was going on, I was three years into my addiction and had learned how to cover it up and trick everyone into thinking I wasn’t completely high even when I was. Hank was deployed, Conrad was about to graduate with a degree in computer science and was programming shit I could never understand, and Kolbi was hustling his ass off to save enough money to open Sweetgrass Security. Everyone knew what they were doing, where they were going, and the pressure to keep up was crippling. It didn’t help that my parents were on me about graduating with honors and applying to some of the top architecture schools in the country. My father was an architect, and I would be, too, even if I didn’t want to be.
The first time my roommate offered me Adderall, I said yes because I had a paper due the next day and a full day of classes. I didn’t think twice about taking it. I had no idea how it would sink its barbs into my brain and alter its chemistry to make me feel as if I was starving without it. I used it a few more times when I was behind on my school work, but by the time I was in my final year of school, I couldn’t go more than twelve hours without some kind of hit. I would lose entire days and wake up in different places unsure of how I got there. More than a few times I would call my friends in the middle of the night to talk to them about something I’d read and not remember our conversation the next morning. The final straw was when I went on a three day bender and passed out in my apartment for nearly twenty-four hours without contacting anyone. Kolbi and Conrad found me on the floor next to an empty pill bottle and told me I needed to get help. They, with the support of Hank all the way from some far off place, drove me to a rehab center and told me they would do whatever they needed to help me get clean.
I appreciate that Kolb.
