Page 12 of Desperate Haste
“Yeah, I’m sorry. But I think you should go.” My lips press together and I wrap my arms in front of me, shrugging at him.
“Oh, of course. No problem.” He quickly reaches for his clothes and heads for the bathroom to clean up. Before I know it, I’m walking him to the door of my condo.
“Well, thanks for a fun night. I hope we can do it again sometime,” he tries, shrugging his shoulders the slightest bit.
“Yeah, maybe.” I give him my most polite smile and open the door. When he leans down to kiss me goodnight, I turn my head in time to have it land on my cheek. He pauses next to my face for half a second and I laugh uncomfortably, trying to make things less than totally, horrendously awkward.
“Have a good night,” I say as he steps out of my condo.
“Yeah, have a good night.” He sounds dazed and confused but walks down the hallway towards the elevator anyway. Once the door is closed, I let out a breath and lock the door behind me.
My feet take me across my condo and into my bathroom that’s tucked away inside my room, and stand at the mirror, looking at myself. I primp my hair, study the way my eyes are shaped and the fullness of my cheeks, and pout at myself. “Well, I guess it’s up to me to do what a man couldn’t.”
Then, I pull open the top drawer in my vanity and smile wide at the collection of toys inside. “Hello, ladies.” My fingers wave over the assortment of vibrators, dildos, strap-ons, and other various sex toys I’ve collected over the years. Tossed in the back of the drawer is a single cockring I’d purchased on a whim but have yet to find someone to use it with. Pulling out a bullet and a vibrator that comes in the shape of a C, I take them both plus a bottle of lube and head back to my bed. Before slipping under the sheets, I take my robe off and hang it up on the back of my closet door.
Once settled, I turn on the bullet vibrator and start to tease myself with it. My favorite thing to do is use it on my nipples first and slowly bring it down to my center. Not enough women understand the pleasure that comes from this kind of play which I find to be an absolute shame. Once my nipples are pert and standing at attention, I drag the toy down my abdomen and start to tease myself with it. Slowly, I push and pull it from inside of me and let it linger on my clit for a few seconds, sending waves of pleasure throughout my body. The muscles in my legs start to tense and I pull the toy away, not wanting to bring myself over the edge too quickly. I repeat the movement again causing my entire body to feel warm. I know how I like to finish though, so I turn on the other vibrator and switch it out with the bullet. I bring the bullet to my nipple again and using the wider end of the C-shaped toy, turn it on and bury it inside me. I turn on the opposite side which is supposed to simulate oral sex and press it down on my clit. As the pressure builds inside of me, I close my eyes and let the feelings consume me. Without meaning to, my mind travels to the last time it felt this good. Images of Malcolm behind me in the mirror fill my brain and I feel myself starting to fall over the edge.
“Malcolm, yes,” I cry out in my empty condo. Every muscle in my body contracts as the toy-induced orgasm rips through my body. Unable to take it any longer, I remove the toys from my body and turn them off as I try to catch my breath. Once my brain reconnects itself and I get my bearings, my hand comes to my mouth when I realize what just happened.
Malcolm, with the help of a few of my friends, managed to make me come without even being in the same room as me.
9
MALCOLM
“Harder, Malcolm. Faster, squeeze your core, son,” Marshall and Reese bark at me from the peanut gallery. It’s Sunday morning and I’m at the training center sparring with some of the other guys Marshall has brought in over the years. Every Sunday morning is open gym which means that you can come and get a few rounds in with some of the other guys who train here. While I’m never one to want to pursue the sport professionally, I still enjoy the occasional round in the ring here and there. It allows me to get out some pent up energy and aggression in a healthy way. And right now, I have plenty to go around.
It’s been a couple weeks since I’d seen her at the bar with that khakis wearing tightwadJason.What did she see in a guy like him? He wore a polo for fucks sake. But the better question is, why do I care so much about what she sees in him? We had one night together. And while it might have been the best sex I’d had in years, it wasn’t like I was in love with her or something. We weren’t together—I don’t date—so she is free to see whoever she wants.
But it still irritated me that she told me no when I asked her to come home with me.
Women never tell me no.
But Ophelia did.
Little fox.
“Watch your left, boy, or you’re gonna—”WHAM!Distracted by the thoughts of her, Ronan lands a solid left hook across my jaw and I go down with a hard thud. “I told you to watch your left,” Marshall deadpans from his metal foldout chair as Reese ‘oohs’from his own. He leans over to look at me as I’m laid out on the mat.
“Thank you, Marshall, you’re a big help when a guy needs it,” I say sarcastically as I take Ronan’s hand and stand up again. I shake my head and remove my training gear, bumping gloves with Ronan as the next man steps in. Sunday sparring is last man standing so once you fall, you’re out until there’s an open spot again.
“Nice hit, man,” I compliment Ronan, a quiet guy who started coming here a year ago, before stepping out of the ring.
Heading for my bag which is on a bench along the wall, I see Marshall get up from his chair in my periphery and start to make his way towards me. He hobbles over and stands slightly hunched to the right when he reaches me.
“Something on your mind, boy?” he asks. The crow’s feet in his eyes dance as he speaks and the straw fedora he’s wearing does precious little to cover up the hair he has left. I pull a towel out of my bag and rub it across my face before pulling my hair out of the bun I had it tied into, shaking it out like a wet dog.
“Uhh, no? Why do you ask?” Using the towel, I wipe my arms and torso off as the hot October heat rages through the training center. Built in an old mechanic’s garage downtown, there is no working AC. The only thing providing a little reprieve from the heat is the two opened garage doors and the occasional breeze that will come through like a true Sunday blessing.
“You just seemed a little in your own head.” He raises a brow at me and studies me through squinted eyes, unsure of if he should believe me or not. I pull on a fresh shirt I stashed in my bag and roll my neck before looking at him again. He’s still staring at me as if he’s waiting on something.
“There’s nothing, truly. I just got distracted, missed Ronan’s tell, and suffered the consequences.” With my bag packed, I head for the door to jump in my truck and go home since it’s my day off but I pause and turn around when I hear him following behind me.
“You’d tell me if something was on your mind?” He looks at me with concern but also so much love. He’s like a father to me, even though he’s old enough to be my grandfather, and wants the best for me. He understands the strained relationship I have with my own father and has stepped into that role without hesitation. I could tell him how I was distracted by the thoughts of her supple curves or by the way she seemed to be toying with me at the bar a couple weeks ago, but why share about something that’s really nothing?
“I promise I would if there was anything to tell. I’ll see ya tomorrow at the bar?” I ask. Seeing as how he is my boss, my sponsor, and also my unofficial training coach, I’ve seen him nearly every day for the last five years. He’s been my sounding board, my mentor, and my biggest supporter through my sobriety journey.
“Yep. I’ll be in when we open but will head home after that. Think you can handle things on your own?” He groans a little as he shifts his weight into his other leg. He’s not much shorter than me but as I look at him, I realize how frail he is starting to look. Sun spots dot his pale skin and white hair fills out a sparse goatee that could use a combing.
