Page 10 of Virgin's New Flavors of Lust
Do they think that I don’t feel that way?
I’m sure a lot of people do because they are idiots if they don’t, they are stupid.
Licking my bottom lip, I turn my attention to my plate of food and continue to eat it. I can see how they are looking at me, like they are trying to figure out who I am. Who I’m going to be.
It’s a little scary because I have no clue what I want to do but I do know that I don’t want to be rude either. I just drawn away in my thoughts, a fluttering feeling welling inside of me as I’m tempted to do something else.
I guess either way, this is what I’m longing for but I’m certain that this is going to go one way or the other.
I just keep doing this one way or the other and I have no idea what is going to come from it. I’m scared of it a lot because I’m wondering what I’m going to end up doing about it.
“What do you do?” Alexi asks me, looking a little curious.
“I was in college.” I explain to them, “Now, I’m on the hunt for a job and just trying to make a life for myself. I want to do what I can to make a successful living.”
“Why are you not married?” Mikhail now asks, raising his eyebrow a little bit, “or why don’t you have a boyfriend? You are quite beautiful. I feel like you’d be swept up almost immediately.”
“I have a very protective brother who sometimes doesn’t know how to chill.” I explain to them, seeing how they raise an eyebrow at me, “and I’d like to say that it gave me reason to date to be defiant, but he ran off anyone who got close to me.”
“So, I’m assuming he doesn’t know that you are here with us?” Alexi wonders, a slight smirk appearing on his face as he realizes this, “I mean, I can see why you wouldn’t want to tell him. You don’t want him attempting to run us off.”
“He would fail.” Mikhail agrees, making me shudder a little bit because I couldn’t believe that is what he said, “because I can promise you that the minute you say okay, you are going to be ours and I’m not going to let you go. I promise.”
I can’t believe this.
Is he being serious?
“I can’t believe that you’re flirting with me.” I murmur, my voice coming out a little huskier than I intended it to, “why?”
His eyebrow raises slightly, and it is like he is wanting to do a lot more to me, “why not? Is there a reason why I shouldn’t be wanting to give you that attention? If you tell me that you don’t want us, we will let go.”
I know that they would but by the look on their faces, I know that it is not what they wish for. It makes me feel a little nervous, gnawing on my bottom lip as I’m worrying about the future.
I’m worrying about what’ll come from it if I end up opening up my heart to them.
I don’t know why they are trying to worm their way in when it is pretty obvious that none of us know what is going to end up happening. I am a little worried in the sense that I have no clue what I’m going to do.
I don’t know if I’m going to be fine, but this is what I need.
It’s what I’m tempted for.
“Why should I choose you two?” I ask them, deciding that I’m going to tease them and make them go crazy, “I’m sure that you have realized that this kind of relationship is never going to be easy, and you might end up wasting your time on me. I don’t think that I’m good enough.”
Mikhail looks pissed and I kind of worried that he might try to prove me wrong. I’d like to be able to do a lot more, thinking that either way, there’s no way that I’m going to be away. I can’t do this, not right here and now.
A moment that could change everything and I’d end up needing to do so much more with it.
I guess I have already figured it out.
“Would you like us to prove you wrong?” Alexi finally speaks up, making me look up at him with surprise because I didn’texpect that to be said, “if I’m being completely honest, I’ve been wanting to claim you already from the moment that I saw you…”
I should say no, a little worried that it could end up blowing up in my face.
If I open up my heart to them, am I going to be the one who gets hurt? Are they going to turn this around on me and then not want anything to do with me after it?
I’m not certain but it is more obvious to me that this is the way that things have to go and I’m not going to be able to do anything else. I guess that’s the terrifying realization and I’m going to have to figure out what I’ll do about it.
“I guess you can try.” I finally agree, slightly worried about what might end up happening.
