John found the waiting room and began to pace, his long strides eating up the floor, since he had the room to himself. He felt like a caged animal. Worrying about Adam. Guilt clawing up his throat. Feeling like he was on the verge of falling apart or tumbling off a cliff orsomething. His heart was still beating too hard, his breaths coming too fast. John took a drink from a bottle of water he'd brought along, then had to rush off to the bathroom when he realized his bladder was practically screaming at him.
He relieved himself, then washed his hands, staring at his reflection as he did so.Daddy. “Fuck,” John breathed. Adam had actually called himDaddy.
John dried his hands and headed back for the waiting room.
He lurched to a stop at the sight of Everett sitting in one of the chairs.
“Ah, there you are,” Everett said, smiling as he stood up.
John moved forward on autopilot, automatically reaching out to shake hands with the man while he tried to get his mind to work. “What are you doing here?” Before Everett could reply, John blurted out, “I'm sorry about the vines. I tried to stop the fire but it spread so fast. And I had been meaning to tell you those grapes needed to come out anyway since they were looking tired but I couldn't make myself do it and now it's too late–”
“John,” Everett interrupted him gently. “John,” he repeated, grabbing him by the shoulders. “It's okay.”
John let out a heavy, shuddering breath.Christ. Since when had he turned into Adam, babbling uncontrollably?
“It's okay,” Everett repeated. “I'msorry you put yourself in harm's way. You know I have insurance for exactly this sort of thing,” he added with a chuckle. “But none of that matters right now. I'm just glad to see you're doing well.”
John nodded.
“Does it hurt much?” Everett asked, nodding at John's arms.
John shook his head, then paused to think about it. His arms did ache, but it was so overwhelmed by everything else that he barely noticed it. “Not really,” he admitted.
“Good,” Everett murmured. He patted John on the shoulder. “And as for why I'm here,” Everett continued, “I'm not your boss right now, so let's drop all the work talk, okay? I'm here as a friend.” The door opened then, and Theo walked in. “We all are.”
John blinked, watching his friend and coworker cross the room. Theo shook his hand, then clapped him on the back. “I'm so glad you're okay,” Theo said.
“Thanks,” John managed, feeling bewildered by their presence. Before he could comment on it, the door opened again,with Beau and Mav coming in this time. A minute later, Griff and Laurie also joined them. John felt speechless, moving like a robot as he shook hands with each man and accepted their well-wishes on his health. “What are you all doing here?” he finally managed to ask.
Everett smiled at him. “We're family, John,” he answered, like it was the simplest and most obvious thing in the world.
It took everything John had not to break down and cry right then and there. He was sorely tempted to let it all go, even in front of every one of the doms in their group, but he managed to hold back. Barely, but still.
The small talk died down, and John went back to pacing, but he kept it somewhat contained. He eyed the clock every few minutes.Christ. It felt like the hands were moving backwards. Had they started yet? Was Adam okay? What if there were complications? What if something went wrong?Fuck. Was this what Adam felt, sitting in the hospital waiting room all those years ago? Granted, Adam had only described the experience as boredom, but John knew there had to have been more to it than that. Despite spending the day before his birthday stuck in a waiting room, anxious for the surgery to be over with so Adam could finally have his own turn under the knife, John knew the boy had to have been worried, anxiously awaiting the moment when the doctor would come out and say it was over and that everything was going to be okay.
Except Adam had never gotten that moment of relief. He'd gotten the worst possible news instead.
John sank into a chair and held his head in his hands.
Someone came over and sat down beside him. A hand landed between his shoulder blades, and a low voice murmured, “He's gonna be okay.”
Theo. John swallowed hard as he nodded, but didn't lift his head. He knew he wouldn't be able to control the worry on hisface. When he finally felt composed enough, John took a deep breath and got up to pace again.
Nobody said anything. John felt them all glancing at him from time to time, but nobody told him to stop. To sit down. Eventually, their quiet, steady presence finally settled into his awareness, seeping down into his bones. None of them complained about the boredom nor looked to be in any hurry to leave.
John stopped and stared at the floor as he felt his control start to slip.
Finally, after what felt like days, the doctor came in and approached John. Even with a smile on the man's face, John didn't completely relax until he heard the words, “Adam's out of surgery. Everything went well.”
John inwardly crumpled even while he forced himself to stay on his feet.Thank fuck. He wrung the doctor's hand. “Thank you,” he managed to get out in an even voice. “When can I see him?”
“He's being moved to recovery as we speak. I'll have a nurse come get you as soon as he's settled. You'll be able to take him home in a couple hours, most likely.” The doctor then went on to reiterate the post-op care Adam needed, which was already outlined in a packet Adam had at home. John had tried memorizing all the details over the weekend, but he suddenly couldn't remember any of it in the wake of Adam's last words. And everything the doctor said seemed to immediately escape his mind.
He knew he'd have to put Adam to bed as soon as they got home, then go take the time to read it all again.
The doctor left, and John finally sat down. He let out a shuddering breath.Christ. He couldn't wait to get Adam home.
No, he couldn't wait to see Adam's face when the boy woke up.
