She needs to love freely, have her voice be heard and have a man that will worship her.
I’m that man, it just took me a while to figure it out.
I can only hope that she thinks so too.
Chapter Thirty-One
Distraction
Lucy
It’s been three days since I left the hospital, and two days since I promised to fight my demons.
As I stare at the walls that are now painted in a warm yellow, I know that I have just been distracting myself instead of facing up to the turmoil that festers inside of me.
I’ve distracted myself with paint, and Cal’s kitchen. I’ve given it a fresh new look that is more inviting than the cold grey walls that looked so dull and lifeless.
Colour, it makes things pop, and this kitchen sure does pop.
“Wow,” I hear Cal say behind me as he enters the kitchen.
“Do you like it?” I ask as I gesture around the room with a small smile on my face. He surveys the room for a moment, and I instantly feel like I have done wrong. “Shit, you don’t like it. I’m sorry, I’ll paint the walls grey again, I didn’t mean to––”
My voice is cut off by Cal walking towards me and placing his finger gently over my lips.
“I love it,” he says and my heart flutters amid the pounding that threatened to raise my anxiety levels.
“Really?” I ask, hopeful. Fuck’s sake, I sound pathetic, but this is what I have been made into. A woman that doubts daily.
“Really,” he says with a nod. His kind eyes make me want to cry.
No, Lucy, no crying.
I’ve done enough of that to last a lifetime, and I know that there will be more to come in the near future. As in, tomorrow, when I have to go to the police station and give a more detailed statement. I’m already dreading it, but I know that I have to do this if I want to get justice for myself, and for anyone else that has been through what I have. I know that it won’t actually make much difference to other women who have been trapped, controlled and belittled, but it makes me feel stronger knowing that if I can speak up, then others can too.
“I thought I’d do the lounge next,” I say to stop my thoughts from overloading my brain.
Keep busy.
Distract the mind.
“What’s wrong with the lounge?” Cal says with his eyebrows raised in question.
“It’s blue, Cal.”
“What’s wrong with blue?”
“Nothing if it’s a light, airy colour for a lounge, but you haven’t got a light, airy colour. You have a dark blue which just makes the room feel cold,” I admit.
“I guess this means another trip to the paint store, huh?” Cal says, his smile lighting up his face.
Fuck. I shouldn’t even be thinking about how good Cal looks right now.
“You don’t mind me injecting some life into this place then?” I say off-the-cuff but am blown away by Cal’s quiet answer.
“There was no life until you.”
I freeze for a minute, just replaying those words over and over in my head.
