“I can walk, Daddy. You don’t need to carry me.”
“I know I don’t have to. I want to.”
“I still weigh a ton, though.”
“You’re still light as a feather and sexy as hell.”
He places me on the bed and pulls the covers over me. Seated beside me, he kisses my hand and tells me, “You did an amazing thing, baby girl. You gave me a child. I imagine that’s pretty grueling on your body. When you need to take a break and rest, you do it. That’s an order.”
“Yes, sir.” I grin. “I love you.”
“I love you, too. Now go to sleep.”
He kisses me on the lips and brushes my hair back. He leaves me, and I fall asleep to the sounds of the birds chirping outside the window.
While I rest, the most incredible dream comes to me. I see us living in the house in the country that Luke said he wanted for us.
He’s on his way back from the creek with a fishing pole draped over his shoulder followed by our little boy dragging a blue bucket. Lucas is a little older and looks just like his father.
It’s a warm spring day, and I’m hanging linens on a clothesline with the sun on my shoulders. My heart is filled with a warmth that only happy moments like this can fuel.
I’ve been asleep for two hours and wake with a sense of panic. I shouldn’t have left Luke to care for the baby for this long. I rush down the stairs but find the house is completely silent.
Nana’s door is ajar, and I can see her lying in her bed. Mrs. Spencer must have put her to bed and left for the night. I search the whole house but can’t find Luke and Lucas anywhere. I check the side window and see that the car is parked right where we left it.
I’m still trying to leave the past behind me, but at this moment, the thought that maybe I don’t deserve this wonderful life tries to creep into my head. Then, I hear it. It’s faint but it’s the sound of Luke gently humming. I follow the sound to the backdoor and see Luke on the porch, rocking Lucas in one of Nana’s old rocking chairs.
Everything is as it should be, and I do deserve this life. I know that because Luke told me so, and I trust him more than I trust myself.
I take a moment to watch them through the screen door. My big, strong husband is so gentle with our little boy. I want to lock this image in my memory so I can go back and experience it over and over again.
Sensing me, Luke turns his head and smiles. “You’re up. How did you sleep?”
I step outside and take a seat in the second rocker beside them. “I had a great dream. How’s the baby?”
“He slept most of the time. I think he might be hungry. If you didn’t come down soon, I was going to bring him up to you.”
“I can feed him here,” I tell him and he hands him to me. He takes the cloth from his shoulder and places it on mine.
I lift my top and place my breast against Lucas’ little face. He wastes no time latching on.
“I told you. With this appetite, he’s going to be a big, strong man just like his father.”
Luke watches as the tiny baby feeds from my breast. “Amazing,” he whispers.
“What’s amazing?”
“You are.” He rises from the rocker and kisses my forehead. “I’ll go get a fresh cup of tea for you.”
He returns with my tea and sets it on the table beside me.
“Tell me about your dream,” he says as I place the tiny boy on my shoulder and gently pat his back.
“It was about us.”
“Now, this is getting interesting,” he jokes. “Were we naked?”
“No. We were living out in the country like you want. You and Lucas must have gone fishing, and I was hanging laundry outside on a clothesline. It was just me watching the two of you coming back with your poles and fish. It was really sweet.”
