Page 16 of Extracurricular with Mr. Abbot
ERIN
I’m so content at being in his arms again. It feels amazing. I have craved this for so long. There’s nothing better than his arms around me as he holds me. It feels as though I’m home. I swallow hard, knowing that he’ll walk away from me again after tonight, and I’ll have to hold on for another year and a half, praying that nothing changes in the meantime. He could find a woman that he doesn’t have to wait for. That plays a lot on my mind, I have to push through it and pray for the best.
As much as I dread that he’s here, knowing that I’m going to have my heart broken all over again when he leaves. I really need it. I need him. I don’t know how he found out about what happened to me, but I’m so glad that he’s here. I feel safe in his arms. It’s a place that I don’t ever want to leave.
“Hey baby,” he says as he lifts me slightly so that I’m sitting up, but I’m still on his lap. “Megan wanted me to give you something.”
My brows knit together as he passes me a gift bag. My heart fills with so much warmth and love. God, she’s such a cutie. “You really didn’t have to do this,” I tell him, but I’m so very glad and grateful he did.
I still can’t believe that he’s here. God, he has been on my mind a lot this past weekend. He’s all I thought about while I was laying in my hospital bed. He’s all I wanted. I know it’s stupid, but I really had hoped that he would come and see me. It’s stupid, and I’ll never tell anyone that’s what I had secretly hoped because I’d hate for them to tell me how crazy I am.
I know the reasons we can’t be together. And I know that when I graduate, we can be together. Hearing him tell me that he loves me is the best thing in the world. It solidified everything that I was feeling. I’ve known I’ve loved him since that very first night, the way he treated me, the way he made me feel, it was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before.
I fell head over heels, and that feeling only intensified as the days turned into months and the months turned into years. He’s all I want, and he’s worth waiting for. The next sixteen months are going to be hard, but they’ll be worth it. God, they’ll be so worth it.
I lean against him as I open presents, smiling as I see the pretty teddy bear. So much like the one I bought for Megan when she was in hospital after hurting herself. God, she’s the sweetest kid, and I love the fact that she thought of me and wanted to do this for me. It means a lot. There’s a few little trinkets in the little mini figurine of a princess, some stickers, new pens for school, a few notebooks. They’re all princess and unicorn inspired, which is fabulous. I reach into the bag and pull out the homemade card. It’s a drawing of me and her on the day we met. She’s wearing a princess dress and crown, and I’m wearing one too. We look so adorable that I can’t keep the smile from my face. She hasn’t forgotten about that day, even though I’ve only met her once. I take a deep breath and read the card.
To Erin
I’m very sad that you were hurt, and I hope that you feel better soon.
I can’t wait to see you again.
Maybe we can play when I do.
Love Megan
I look up from the card and up at Jared. “Your daughter is amazing,” I whisper. God, she’s the freaking sweetest.
His arms tighten around me even more. “She learned that from you. You showed her kindness twice, Erin, and the first time you didn’t even know who she was. I think that was the day I knew I was going to spend the rest of my life with you.”
I swallow hard at his words. God, I needed this conversation. I needed to hear how much he wanted me. “I fell for you the first night we met,” I confess, feeling a little giddy.
His grin is cocky, as it was that first night. “That’s good, baby, because I did too.”
I lie against him, content to be here with him now. “Is Megan with your parents?” I ask.
“No baby, she’s at school, she started Kindergarten. When school’s over, she’ll go to my parents until I finish work. I have about two hours before I have to be back.”
I love that he has a support network around him. That he and Megan have his parents to help if they need it. “What’s going to happen once I graduate?” I need to have a plan, I want something to look forward to. I need to focus on something other than what happened.
“I want you, Erin, that’s not ever going to change. I want you in my bed, and in my life. I know that Megan is going to be fucking excited to have you in our lives. But we’ve got to go slow.”
She grins. “That I can do. As long as I’m with you and Megan, I’m happy.”
His lips slant across mine, and he kisses me. I moan as I press my breast against his chest and lean into the kiss, my arms wrapping around his neck. His tongue slides into my mouth, and the kiss becomes frantic, frenzied, and passionate. It’s conveying everything that we both feel.
I pull back, needing some oxygen. “As much as I’d love to stay with you, baby, I’m going to have to leave. I’ve got classes, and if I don’t, I won’t be leaving until morning, and right now, that’s not the best thing for either of us.”
I smile, I know the feeling, if he stays, we’re going to have sex, and as much as I love him, I’m not in the right frame of mind for that, not to mention, it’ll make the absence even harder. He also has to go home and see his daughter. I’ll never be the reason that he’s not around her. That’s not something I’ll ever feel good about. It’s one of the reasons that I love him, the way he loves his daughter. “Go,” I tell him, making no move to get off his lap. “Get some rest and enjoy your day, and give Megan a big hug when you see her from me.”
He presses a chaste kiss to my lips, and lifts me off his lap. “Love you, baby,” he whispers before he walks toward the door.
My stomach clenches as I watch him leave. God, this is the part that I hate. I never want to say goodbye, and the day I stop doing it will be the happiest day of my life.
Sixteen months.
We can do this. It’s only sixteen months.
