Page 6 of Written in the Stars
A small smile forms on my face for the first time in hours. Coffee makes everything better. Or at least it does for the moment. Just like ice cream, but I can’t stomach it now.
“Please sit down,” she says.
I pull out a stool from underneath the kitchen island and plop down. Lissa’s kitchen is gorgeous. She has marble granite counter tops all around, which go nicely with the stainless-steel appliances. When she caught her husband, Michael, having an affair, she didn’t hesitate to fill out the divorce papers and file. With him having a larger income than her, he owed her a ton of money in alimony. She made out nicely, and it suited him right. My sister had been nothing but a loving, faithful wife to that man.
So what did she do with the money? She remodeled and redecorated her entire house. It wasn’t as though they had kids together that she needed to take care of. Anyway, if that were the case, he’d have to pay her child support as well.
As I think about what she’s gone through, and now what Walter has put me through, I can’t imagine ever wanting to get involved with anyone else again. To start all over, build something, and then having the other person knock it down so easily because they can’t keep their pants on and be faithful is more than I ever want to deal with again. I am done for good. Love, as far as I know it, is dead.
She hands me a black mug almost filled to the brim with piping-hot coffee. The aroma alone is intoxicating. I didn’t realize before then how much my body was longing for something warm and soothing to fill it.
“Thanks, Lissa. This smells amazing.” I take my first sip, and it’s like heaven on earth. “So, how’s Pop doing?” I ask.
Our father is in a psychiatric hospital for chronic depression and basically going insane since our mother died. She was killed in a fire three years ago while at work. My mom was an elementary school teacher. All the children thankfully made it out okay, but Mom, along with one other young woman, the kindergarten teacher, didn’t make it out in time. It was hard on all of us, but my mother was my dad’s whole heart. I have never witnessed a couple more devoted to one another or more in love than the two of them. They had been high school sweethearts and had never parted.
Until that day…
Of course, I was already living with Walter at that time and was nowhere near when Mom passed. As soon as Lissa and Dad got word, they called me, but by the time I arrived, it was already too late.
My mother was gone, and I didn’t even have a chance to say goodbye.
After taking a sip from her own cup, she answers. “Oh, you know. The same. I wish I could stay home and look after him, but I honestly don’t think it would make much of a difference. His depression is to the point where he would literally kill himself if he could. He needs that constant watch over him. I could do it, but he would hate me for it. The store was his dream.”
L. Darling’s Accessories had been our father’s store, which he’d named after Mom. Of course, when Mom passed, he could no longer run it. Lissa took over, and that was that.
“Damn, I feel horrible. To know that he would rather end his life than to live without Mom. It sucks.” It’s numbing knowing there isn’t anything we can do to help him get through his misery.
“It does, but there’s not much we can do to help him. He misses her. I miss her. The whole thing just stinks.”
I nod. “I’ve got to go visit him one of these days. Maybe bring him a new crossword puzzle; he loves those.”
Lissa shook her head. “He used to. Last time I brought him a three-hundred-page book with hundreds of crosswords, he threw it at me… told me to, ‘stick it where the sun don’t shine.’ Those were his exact words.”
I practically spit out my coffee. My father, always so blunt and not filtering his thoughts these days. He always tells people how he really feels. “What?!”
She chuckles and shrugs. “Yeah, he’s mad at the world. There’s nothing you can bring him or do for him that will cheer him up. It’s been three years since she’s been gone, and he has shown no sign of improvement. He’s still mourning.”
I take another sip and then say, “I don’t know if he will ever not mourn over her…”
“That’s true. It’s just sad we can’t even help our own father.”
“I know…” I respond, wishing there was something we could do to help.
We continue talking in the kitchen, drinking our coffees until close to midnight. Lissa fixes me a bed in the guest room and says I’m welcome to stay for as long as I want. At that moment, I don’t know how long I will stay, but I have no intention of returning to Narrowville ever again.
That night, I toss and turn in bed for hours. I can’t get comfortable, but luckily, I’m able to keep my tears at bay. At 2:30 a.m., a new message comes through from Walter.
Walter: Baby, I’m so sorry. Please call me.
At this point, I rush into the settings of his text message and selected the Do Not Disturb option. I’m tempted to delete his contact information from my phone, but not wanting to act too hastily, I decide muting his messages is the best option for now.
As I close my eyes, I pass out and embrace a deep sleep that I never imagined would have come so easily.
* * *
The next morning, I’m up and welcoming a new day way before Lissa is even out of bed. I figure the least I can do is pick up some freshly brewed coffee and bagels from the deli. I grab the spare set of house keys off the counter in the front entrance in case she’s still asleep by the time I get back.
When I walk back into the house with the carrying tray and brown paper bag, I find her sitting at the island with a glass of orange juice, reading something on her tablet.
