“It’s just one semester. It’s a lot, but there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.”
“You know, the offer still stands about me loaning you the rest of what you owe,” she said, fiddling with her bag.
“Olivia,” I sighed. “Thank you, but I can’t.”
“Why?” she asked, her irritation making her sound snappish. “Why are you being so stubborn?” She took a deep breath to collect herself. “I’m sorry. I just miss you and I don’t get it. You’ll take loans from all the banks and work yourself to the bone, but you won’t let me help.”
I’d explained to her before, but not in all its painful details. “My parents always struggled with money, but they never took loans. They worked more jobs and cut expenses, but they never took loans. Then one time—one freaking time—their best friends offered them a loan when my parents had nowhere else to turn, and it ruined them. Theirclosefriends lorded it over them, asking for favors and extras. They never signed anything because they were friends, and they abused it by changing the payments, asking for more on different months without notice. Or changing the dates and getting pissed when my parents didn’t have the money.”
For the first time Olivia looked at me with understanding.
“My parents always made the payments, no matter the circumstances. Which usually meant we went without. And my friendship with their daughter deteriorated right along with everything else. She became snobby and made fun of my family for not having enough.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“It’s okay. I never told you,” I said packing up my bag. “Money changes people, Olivia. It changes situations and relationships, and I can’t have anything change between us.”
“Aw.” She put her hand over her heart and pouted dramatically. “You’d rather suffer than lose me. It’s true love.”
“Like I said, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. In the new school year, I’ll have more scholarships andbankloans. It will be great,” I finished with a forced smile, looking up to see Callum’s eyes jerk away again.
Standing, I tossed my bag over my shoulder and kept my eyes glued to the door. I just had to get out of there, and I’d buy myself one more day of avoidance.
“Miss Derringer,” Dr. Pierce called.
Shit. I’d been so close to freedom. I should’ve explained to Olivia outside the classroom, taken my opportunity to get the hell out of there.
It was too late now.
Cautiously, I turned with raised eyebrows and hoped I hid the panic rushing through me.
“May I have a word? It’s about the sign-up for the project.”
How did he keep his face so calm and collected when I was trembling from the inside out?4I needed to get out of there.
“Umm, I can’t, sorry. I have to get to my next class. Emailing me might work best.” I forced a smile, turned and grabbed Olivia’s arm, and got us the hell out of there.
“Wow, that was awfully brave to turn down Dr. Pierce’s request. He seemed serious. I would have stayed with you. You know, just friendly support. Not at all so I could drool over him more.” She laughed and bumped me with her shoulder. “You know what? Be less brave next time.”
I laughed too, but mine was tinged with a little desperation.
I felt anything but brave anymore.
chaptereighteen
Callum
I waitedall of Friday for her to show up. I canceled meetings, put off phone calls, declined a lunch invitation. Until I finally got up the nerve to ask Donna if she’d seen Oaklyn.
“Miss Derringer called in this morning to let me know she wouldn’t be in.”
“Oh.” I nodded “Okay.”
“Sorry, I didn’t tell you sooner, the Post-it note I wrote it on got lost under all this craziness. Do you need me to find you another student aide for something?”
“No, no. Thank you.”
I returned to my office and tried to focus on anything but Oaklyn. Once the clock struck four o’clock and people started going home, I still sat there. Rationalizing that if she thought I went home and wasn’t there, that she may show up for something. It didn’t happen.
