Boxer was here until a while after dinner. He remained outside, only coming to stand in my doorway if someone entered my room. The man won’t take his eyes off me with someone else around. Honestly, it makes me feel safer knowing he’s here and paying such close attention to the situation. I’m not sure who took over for him as they haven’t shown their face to me. Boxer didn’t even say anything before leaving the hospital. Not that he owes me anything. Though, I know someone’s here because the club probably feels some type of way for what happened and the other guy leaving me alone for his own reasons. I’m betting a payoff from Vince as a way to get me alone.
It wasn’t long before sleep claimed me and I managed to sleep the entire night. Well, when there wasn’t a nurse coming in to check on me or draw more blood from my body. I’m not sure what other tests need to be run and when I ask, they simply say it’s to check my levels. That’s not really an answer, so I’ll have to ask Kathy once I see her.
Today, I’ve already had breakfast, had my vitals checked, and I’m now waiting for the ultrasound machine to be brought up so I can see my son or daughter. It’s been fixed and they’re moving through the list of patients until they get to me. I guess more of us in here need to have them done for various reasons. Even though I want to get out of here in the worst way, I’m not going to be a bitch about things. There’s an order they’ll do the ultrasounds in based on the needs of the patient and I’m not about to make someone who’s in worse shape than me wait for a test to be performed to get answers they might desperately need to come up with a solution to what’s going on with them.
I’d wish I had let Bronwan leave my phone here, but there’s really no reason for me to have it while I’m in the hospital. No one’s going to be calling me for anything and all the calls for the shop will be picked up by the voicemail we’ve got set up. I’ll go through all of those once I get out of here and find out what’s going on. There really is no time to waste because I have multiple events coming up quicker than I realized.
Talon did let me know yesterday they’ve gotten a construction crew in the shop to fix the door and put better locks on the place. Zeus is also going to be updating the security system once Jae gets out of the hospital. Sabotage and him aren’t really leaving her side for much. The only reason Sabotage was down here yesterday was to let Jae know I’m okay and what’s going on. She heard about the attack and wouldn’t let it go until he came down to check on me. Zeus has only left her side to gather things they forget to bring with them or have someone else bring them. At least the shop will be ready to open back up once I get out of the hospital and can keep it open for the remaining time Jae’s out.
As I’m lost in my head about everything, there’s a knock on my door. I barely hear it over everything I’m thinking about. But I must manage to make some sort of sound as the door opens and a large machine is wheeled inside. When I look over, Death is behind the woman pushing it through the door with Brent in his arms. It’s the first time I’ve seen the man holding my son. Or any child for that matter.
“Good afternoon. I’m Marsha and I’ll be performing your ultrasound today. Is there anyone you’d like in the room with you while I’m doing it?” she asks, a small smile on her face.
“No, thank you. I’ll have my son in bed with me, but that’s it,” I inform her while keeping my eyes locked on Death so he knows I don’t want him in the room when this happens.
“I’m not goin’ anywhere, Half Pint,” he lets me know as if he has some say in the matter. “This concerns me too and I won’t be waitin’ outside for you to have it done.”
“Yes, you will. I know you’re stance on the situation and don’t want you in here. Death, you’ve brought my son to me and can come back in once she’s done. While the baby is being shown, there’s no reason for you to be in this room. Please. Leave,” I manage to grit out, my voice remaining soft and calm with my son and Marsha in the room with us.
I’d really prefer not to give the nurses anything to gossip about. Death doesn’t seem to feel the same way as he pulls up a chair and gets comfortable at the side of my bed with Brent in his lap.
“I’m gonna sit here and hold Brent. He can’t be in the bed with you while she does her work. I don’t want him to get in the way or get that gel stuff on him. What if he’s allergic to it?” he throws out as Marsha looks between the two of us.
Instead of keeping this bullshit going, I just don’t respond. I keep my eyes trained on the ceiling as Marsha moves around and gets everything ready. When I do speak, it’s to answer her questions. I’m asked my name, date of birth, things like that. Once Marsha has everything ready to go, including my gown lifted up to just under my breasts and the blankets covering everything except my stomach, I finally remove my eyes from the ceiling. As the wand is placed on my stomach and a few buttons are pressed on the computer, the room is filled with the sound of the baby’s heartbeat. It’s a steady rhythm and tears fill my eyes as I listen to it.
“The heartbeat sounds good, Kelsey. Nice and strong,” Marsha says, giving me the only assurance she can today. “Are you ready to see your little one?”
“I am. Can we turn the monitor a little bit so he’s blocked from seeing it please?” I question her, not bothering to look at the man I’m talking about to see his response.
Death is the one who wanted to remain in this room with me right now. If he heard the heartbeat, there’s nothing I can do about it. However, I can make sure he doesn’t see anything on the screen as the baby comes into view.
“There’s no need to turn it on my account,” Death says, moving his chair closer to my head without pulling any of the wires or anything attached to me.
I’m going to take great joy in beating this man. He makes me so damn frustrated. For someone who wants nothing to do with the baby I carry in me, he’s sure inserting himself here today. Not leaving the room during the ultrasound and moving to get a better view of the screen. Every single action he’s taking right now goes against him telling me he could do nothing more than give me financial help during the pregnancy and for our child. Death is currently acting like a doting father who can’t wait to see his son or daughter. It’s not who he is and I hope he knows I’m doing everything I can to keep him as far removed from this as possible.
Marsha points different parts of the baby out on the screen while taking measurements of everything. My entire focus is on the baby as memories of seeing Brent while still in my stomach surface. The experience is the same as before but different with Death sitting here. I’ve never had someone with me during an ultrasound because I had already left Vince and wouldn’t have taken him with me if I had still been with him. The man would have only ruined the experience. Death isn’t doing much of anything other than sitting in the chair at my side.
“Do you want to know the gender today?” Marsha asks me, as she continues moving the wand around.
“If we can,” I answer automatically.
There’s no reason to check with Death knowing he won’t be here at the end anyway. I want to know what I’m having and it’s my decision to make. Since he wants to be in the room so badly, he can suck it up.
“You can tell what the baby’s gonna be?” he questions Marsha, leaning more over my body while looking at the screen better.
“I can. As long as the baby is in the right position, I’ll be able to tell. I mean, there’s always room for error, but it’s pretty accurate,” Marsha answers as she moves the wand around some more. “Mom, you’re going to have another little boy.”
Looking at the screen, I can barely make out what she’s talking about. I hear Death suck in a gasp at the knowledge of having a son. I’m not going to be dumb enough to believe this is going to change his mind about anything though. He told me there were reasons for him not wanting to be a part of the baby’s life and finding out the gender isn’t going to change those reasons. No matter how much I wish the situation is different, it’s not.
“Is he okay? I mean, I know you really can’t tell me much, but I need to know he’s okay,” I say with tears sliding down my face, feeling like the biggest cry baby ever.
All I seem to be doing these days is crying for one reason or another. I’m not normally a woman who cries over everything. I simply suck it up and move on. Now, there’s so many hormones running through my body and there’s no way to control my response to any given situation. Death runs a finger down my cheek and pulls away a few tears that he wipes on his jeans as I look over at him. For just a second there’s such a sweet, tender look on his face. It’s quickly replaced by the blank mask I’ve noticed him wearing on a daily basis. The face he hides his pain behind while keeping the members and ol’ ladies of the club safe from harm.
“I’m going to print out some pictures for you, Kelsey. I’ll give Dr. Mason the results of the ultrasound so she make a decision moving forward. As far as him being okay, I really can’t say anything right now.”
I didn’t figure she’d answer the question, but a large part of me needs to know he’s okay and nothing will happen to him. Vince thrives on causing destruction and taking away anything that makes me happy. This baby is just one more thing he’ll try to take from me. He’s already threatening me with Brent, and that’s his own damn child. What kind of monster would say they’re going to sell their own child?
Marsha leaves after handing over two pictures of my son. I stare at them in wonder until the door closes behind her. Setting them down on the rolling table where my trays get put, I turn to face Death so I can have Brent with me on the bed. My son is curled up against Death’s chest and his eyes are fluttering closed as he fights going to sleep. It is his nap time though.
