My throbbing erection is begging to be set free from my pants, to feel the heat of Griffin’s hand wrapped around it. But I shove aside my need. I swallow Griff’s cum, then roll my tongue along the tip. He’s sensitive, and twitching, his grunts sending me into my own type of high. I love pleasing him, servicing him. The way he touches me after, the way he rewards me withhim. His affection and kisses, and even just the taste of his salty release. It’s all a form of praise that feeds my soul.
Releasing him, I press my cheek against the inside of his thigh.
Griff strokes my hair, then leans to press a kiss to the top of my head. “Now that is an apology, sweet cheeks.”
My heart pounds, happily thudding with his praise, but just as quickly, it cracks. I wrap my hands around one of his legs, clinging to him, and before I can stop them, the tears fall.
“What’s wrong?” His hand strokes the top of my head to comfort me.
“You shouldn’t forgive me. I don’t deserve it.”
“No. You don’t.” His voice is raw, the betrayal I’ve caused between us swirling through the air. “I think we need to talk about the time frame of how this child was conceived.”
I nod, pushing away. “I know,” I say as I stand.
Griff tucks himself back into his waistband and fixes the zipper on his pants.
I swallow, trying to ignore the lump in my throat. “Anything. I’ll tell you anything you want to know.”
He works his jaw, hands clenching into tight fists. “We were together.”
“I’m so sorry. I’m sofuckingsorry.” The words come out shaky. If I could rip my heart out and give it to him, I would. “God. I barely remember the night. I never thought—”
“–I can’t forgive you for this, Paddy. You–”
“–I know. I betrayed you.”
He closes his eyes and inhales a long breath. His chest rises, but he never exhales. “Tell me what happened.”
“I don’t remember. If I did, I would have told you the day it happened.”
I don’t miss the clenching of his jaw. “Well, you better try to remember.”
There’s rustling in the front of the store. Fuck, I forgot about the cashier. She probably heard us back here. My gut twists. My family doesn’t know about Griff, and they can’t find out like this.
Griff must be able to tell that’s what I’m worried about, because he taps my chin, forcing me to look at him.
“She didn’t hear anything. Focus,” he says.
My eyes dart between his. He’s mad. The scowl on his face tells me that much, and I don’t blame him. But there’s a hint of hope in his almond-colored eyes. Like maybe he won’t believe it until I admit it. And how can I admit it? I don’t remember dick. If it weren't for the baby sharing my DNA as proof, I couldn't believe it myself.
“We’d been arguing on the phone. You didn’t want me to tell Cal about us, and I finally had the courage. We fought for a while about it. And it just put me in a shit mood.”
Griff nods, showing he remembers exactly which night. “You don’t ever have to come out to your family. To anyone, Paddy. I’d never want to be the reason–”
“–We’re getting off topic. We can circle back to that later.” My palms are sweating horribly. I wipe them on my pants, stalling before I speak again. “We were in New York for an Italian wedding. Callum forced me to go with him because he said I needed to step up more. Pull my weight since I’d be his second.”
I pause, rubbing my burning eyes. My gaze drops to my feet and Griff doesn’t miss my hesitation.
“Look at me when you tell me how you fucked someone else while I was completely unaware.”
I sniffle, pulling my head up to maintain eye contact. “It’s fuzzy, Michael. I remember sitting with Camille and her father. I remember being uninterested despite her crawling all over me. And I kept pushing her away, baby. I swear, I swear I had no interest in her.”
Griff raises a brow. “You had no interest in her?” I know what he’s trying to say. Camille is a leggy brunette with chocolate eyes. She’d been my type when I dated women. There isn’t anything wrong with her, just that she's not the one who stole my heart. And I wasn’t interested. Everything about her, about the entire evening, had been off.
“I didn’t. I love you, Griffin. I’d never… I wouldn’t do this, and I don’t remember it, and it's fucking everything up. I’m such a fucking piece of shit.”
Griff chuckles. “I can’t argue with you there.”
