He bit his lower lip, frowning. “I worry you don’t know how much I love you.”
“I know you love me,” I said softly. “You don’t have to make a grand gesture for me to know that.”
“But you want to live with me. As obtuse as I am, even I’ve caught the hints about living together permanently. You want that.” He studied me. “Correct?”
“Only if you want to live with me. It’s not a hostage situation.”
His smile was strained. “But if I were like other people… that would be the natural progression for a normal couple, right?”
“We don’t have to do things the way other people do them.” I shrugged. “We don’t have to concern ourselves with what the norm is.”
“But why not? Why shouldn’t we?” He frowned. “BecauseI’mnot normal?”
I grimaced. “That’s not what I meant.”
He sighed. “It is the truth though. I don’t function like most people. We’ve grown closer in spite of me. Even I know that, Royce.”
I didn’t bother arguing with him. He wouldn’t appreciate it, and the honest truth was Max was different than most people. He was difficult to understand and hard to get close to. “The thing is, doing something before you’re really ready to do it could do more harm than good.”
“I see.” He nodded. “You’re worried I’m just making an empty gesture?”
“Well, maybe?” I frowned.
He blinked at me, a line between his dark brows. “But we’ve been living together very happily, right?”
“Yes.” Was he actually serious about living together? I didn’t want to get my hopes up.
“Why would that change simply because we’d be living in a new place?”
“Well,” I drawled, “we might be just fine in another place together.”
“I can hear hesitation in your voice though,” he said quietly.
I gave a jagged laugh. “I guess my worry is what ifafterI move in, you suddenly decide you don’t want me there? That would be mighty awkward, Max. That kind of rejection could bruise my ego big-time.”
“I see what you’re saying, but I wouldn’t have suggested this if I didn’t want to be with you. I’ve become very accustomed to you always being there. I miss you when you’re gone. I don’t express it as much as you might, but to me, that must mean I like living with you. I… I don’t actually need space from you like you think I do.”
My chest squeezed with affection. He was trying so hard to say the right things. When I’d first started seeing Max, he wouldn’t have volunteered anything about his feelings. Now he was doing his best to put me at ease. He was allowing himself to be vulnerable, and that meant the world to me.
“I feel like you should think about it more, Max. Really mull over the idea some.”
He lifted his brows, looking baffled. “So… you’re rejecting my offer?”
“God no. I’m saying think about it a tad longer. Now that you’ve made the offer, let it simmer. By the time your escrow closes next week, we can make a decision. Together. If you’ve changed your mind, I won’t hold that against you.”
“You’re telling me if I were to suddenly withdraw my offer, it wouldn’t bother you?” He looked skeptical. “I don’t believe you. I think there would be hurt feelings.”
I studied him. He looked so serious. Genuine. I wanted to believe his offer was based solely on his desire to live with me. But I worried he felt sorry for me because of all the shit I was going through right now. That would be the absolutely wrong reason to move in together.
I stroked one finger down his cheek. “The most important thing to me is that we stay together. I’m holding out hope that, eventually, you will want to live with me. Maybe you do now. All I’m saying is I want you to really think about it. It’s a big decision.”
He frowned. “All right. But I don’t think I’m going to change my mind.”
I smiled. “Good. Because I want to live with you. And I think you’d be more comfortable in that house. With your beloved pool.”
“Maybe you’re the one who’s afraid to live together permanently. Maybe that’s why you’re being so difficult.”
“I’m not being difficult. I’m being practical.” I smirked. “I’m known for being levelheaded, you know.”
