“Why do people always ask sick and injured people that question?” he returned. “Obviously we feel like total shit, or you wouldn’t ask. And you’re the ones who know exactly how fucked up we are.”
“Definitely better,” she said, smile deepening. He was really losing his touch.
“You’re going to live,” Asa said, his darker-skinned face coming into view behind Seliah, wizard-black gaze penetrating. “How, I don’t know. With the amount of metal I’ve extracted from your body, not to mention your heart, you should be dead several times over.”
“Yeah, about that. I—”
Asa held up his hands, stopping him. “I really don’t need or want to know. What’s relevant at the moment is that I’ve done what I can to restore your heart, but it was well and truly shredded.”
Jadren winced. No wonder every beat hurt.
“Exactly,” Asa said, as if Jadren had commented. “Selly claims you can finish the fix on your own, so I revived you far sooner than I normally would have so you can avail yourself of your familiar’s magic.”
His familiar. Seliah. She beamed at him, foolishly happy. The possessive longing for her nearly took his breath away. Well, that and the fact that his literally shredded heart was leaking blood instead of pumping it. His mother would be fascinated by this new data on what he could survive. Not that he had any intention of letting her find out. He rolled his head away from Seliah’s touch. “Leave me alone, poppet. I need to sleep.”
“You need my magic,” she insisted, wrapping her hands around his. Sadly, he was too weak to resist.
“You need her magic,” Asa confirmed wearily. “Otherwise you’ll kill me with trying to keep your heart working.”
“No one asked you to,” Jadren pointed out dourly.
“Incorrect. Lord Phel’s orders.”
“I wish the Phel family would decide whether they wanted me alive before they tried to kill me,” Jadren complained.
Seliah canted her head, amused. “I feel you have only yourself to blame.”
Likely true.
“Take my magic, Jadren,” she said in a quietly urgent voice. “Heal yourself. The rest can be worked out later.” She regarded him so seriously that it was clear she understood his reservations. Perhaps she even understood that he would leave, and why he had to.
With a resigned nod, he closed his eyes and gave in, opening himself to the sweet rush of her magic, moonlight on water, rain across the moon, purely, brightly argent, the cooling wave of it bathing his aching heart in such an immediate cessation of pain that he moaned involuntarily.
And fell back into oblivion.
Asa kept him in the infirmary for another day, threatening to strap Jadren to the bed if he attempted to get up for anything more than visits to the necessary. Seliah hovered, undaunted by his snarling insults and taunting, smiling as if he was reciting love poetry instead. She only left his side when ordered to by Asa, at which point shed give Jadren a kiss he couldn’t dodge, smile, sweetly, and promise to return before he could miss her.
He missed her before she even disappeared from sight. He had to get away from her, and soon.
A steady stream of visitors, all wishing him well, further befuddled him. He’d known from the beginning that House Phel was a cesspool of idealists, all of them merrily making friendships and alliances, all so happy and convivial, but he’d never imagined they’d turn it on him.
They all seemed sincerely pleased to see him recovering, obeying Asa’s injunctions to avoid distressing news, and keeping to irritatingly idle chatter. Tall, blond Han spoke cheerfully of the weapons training they’d work on once Jadren was up and about, while pretty freckled, redheaded Iliana regaled him with tales of the creature that lurked in the workshop watery abyss, which sounded improbably like a giant pink seahorse. Even Alise, who he’d treated with rather merciless condescension, spent time chatting with him about carefully neutral aspects of wizardry, drawing out his opinions on potential product lines for House Phel.
Nic visited also, inquiring after his needs, not lingering long, though she gave him searching looks and reassuring smiles. Gabriel Phel did not visit, not until the hour before Asa had decreed Jadren would be allowed to leave the infirmary—after the evening meal and a final infusion of healing magic, from both Seliah and the Refoel healer. The infirmary was quietly deserted when Phel arrived, Jadren impatiently waiting through the ticking minutes until he was free.
“Well, I suppose this was inevitable,” Jadren observed drily as Lord Phel entered and set up wards for privacy. “Come to try to execute me again? I’d request something less painful, but that wouldn’t be as satisfying for you, I imagine.”
“Tempting as the invitation might be, I’m not going to kill you,” Gabriel replied, snagging a chair and bringing it to Jadren’s bedside, straddling it backward. “If I even could,” he added, a question in his voice.
“Well, not for want of trying anyway,” Jadren said consolingly. “And not that I blame you,” he continued in a more serious vein. “Lord Phel, I never planned to bond your sister as my familiar. I know you have no reason to believe me, but I didn’t want this for Seliah.”
The silver-haired wizard looked taken aback by that confession. “What did you want for her—or, rather, what do you want?”
Good question. “Better than me,” Jadren answered with brutal honesty. “I harbor no illusions about my ability to function as anything resembling a healthy human being. Seliah deserves a decent life. She’s had a shit deal so far and an even shittier one because of me. The one upside of her being bonded to me is that it gives her better legal status. She doesn’t have to attend Convocation Academy now if she doesn’t want to. No other wizard can bond her.” He wrung out a smile at Gabriel Phel’s dubious frown. “I plan to leave,” Jadren clarified. “All I need from you is your permission, releasing me from my contract. You all have the ability to tap Seliah’s magic here. She’ll let you do it, so you can keep her sane and healthy. I relinquish all claim to her. I’ll disappear and never be seen again.”
“Why would you do that?” Gabriel sounded sincerely bewildered. “I’m looking for the trick here and not seeing it.”
“No tricks. Not this time. I never planned to keep her.”
