I nod and stroke my thumb gently over his knuckles. “And your mom?”
“She stayed at home with me.” He clears his throat and shifts uncomfortably in the seat. “I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions about last night. I just assumed and—”
“I pulled away earlier. I get it.” And I get that there must be a dozen different emotions rolling around in his head right now. He has feelings for me he wasn’t expecting. That’s clear as day. And we went and jumped headfirst into things in Vegas. Now we have to sort that mess out, all the while figuring out what this is between us. It’s a lot to deal with when unresolved emotions about his past are eating at him like this.
“We’ve screwed all of this up,” he says quietly. “I like you, too. I really fucking like you. But we’re getting our marriage annulled. And I work for your brothers. I don’t give a shit what they think about us seeing each other, but I can’t afford to lose my job. I’ve got nowhere else to go.”
The confusion and the pain in his voice are palpable, and after hearing about his parents, I understand why. I’ve put him in a precarious position, and he has a heck of a lot more to lose than I do.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have pushed so hard—”
He shakes his head before I can finish. “No. This isn’t your fault. I knew what I was doing, but I didn’t care.”
Until now.
“Maybe this is where it ends.” The words hurt my heart, but I refuse to be the reason he loses everything he’s worked so hard for. “Or I could talk to my brothers.”
“Sweetness…” He turns in the seat and cups my cheek. “This is my fuck-up to fix, not yours.” He grimaces at the word choice and sighs. “The only problem is… I’m not sorry. I had a great time with you in Vegas, and last night was even better. I can’t look them in the eye and apologize for something I’d do all over again.”
My silly heart swoons, and I press into his palm. “I would, too.” Even the parts I don’t remember, because if they hadn’t happened, I probably wouldn’t have ended up in his cabin last night. Or here with him now.
“Maybe we could do this for a little while longer.” He smooths his thumb along my bottom lip. “You’re going back home tomorrow anyway. There’s no reason we can’t still talk. Maybe naked video chat every now and then.”
I laugh. “I don’t want to get you in trouble.”
“I’m already in trouble.” He leans in and brushes a kiss across my lips. He tastes like whiskey and temptation, but we can’t let things get out of hand tonight. He’s too volatile, and we’ve pushed our luck enough this weekend. “We should get going before the boys send out the cavalry.”
I nod. “I want to say goodbye before I leave tomorrow. Maybe I can take a walk in the morning?”
“I have to be at the ranch early. The farrier is coming to look at Smoke. He’s favoring one of his back hooves.”
Damn. “Okay. Can I help? I used to want to be a farrier. You know, before I became a snob who couldn’t wait to get away from the ranch.”
He smiles. “If that’s what trips your trigger.”
“It does. Hoof work is oddly satisfying to me.”
“You know what’s satisfying to me?” He steals another kiss just as a truck turns and headlights illuminate the road behind us. Most likely Holden and Alana. “You, sweetness. You scare the shit out of me, but everything about you lights up me up inside.”
“I feel the same.” But it doesn’t scare me in the least.
In fact, it makes me feel more alive than I ever have.
* * *
By the time I drop off Dean and get back to the Magnolia Blue, Holden’s in the shower and Alana is curled up on the couch with a book and a piece of birthday cake.
“How’s Dean?” she asks around a forkful of yellow frosting.
“Fine. Got a little nauseous on the way home, but it passed.”
“Ah. I wondered if that’s why you were stopped. Either that or he was bitching about your driving.”
I laugh as I kick off my shoes, pull my hair up into a messy knot, and join her in the living room. “Surprisingly, he didn’t complain too much about that.”
“I’m shocked. He won’t even let Ben or Cooper touch his truck.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t give him much choice.” And he’s also seen my boobs, so that might’ve swayed him a little.