Page 23 of Into the Dark
So he hasn’t forgotten my words. Of course, it was too much to hope that he had. He remembers them. Those shameful, horrible words I spat at the man I love.
I close my eyes and turn my head away from him once more. When I open them again the dizziness washes over me in great waves, worse than it’s been all night, and I feel as though I’m about to pass out.
“I…I need to go get some water,” I tell him. It’s a necessity now. I feel his eyes watching me as I go, and I’m scared I might trip again.
Inside, I leave the door open slightly because I don’t want him to think I’m in here crying or doing something equally as weak. As I turn on the faucet and let the water run for a moment I look at myself in the mirror. I look pale, such a change from earlier. My makeup and hair have stayed more or less intact, but I definitely look whiter than I did today. As I lean down and tilt my mouth under the water, the heavy blackness is sudden and suffocating as it descends over my eyes, gravity dragging me down. I manage to call for him just before I feel myself pass out.
The next thing I know I’m in his arms. He’s carrying me across the suite to the bed. I fainted? I’m certain I’ve never fainted in my life. My medical head is fuzzy as I try to piece together what other symptoms I’ve had today. Dizziness, nausea, and I guess being a little achy in certain places. Viral, most likely. But I barely ate anything this morning or during the meal because I felt sick with nerves, and so it could be that. It could also be dehydration and exhaustion because I haven’t slept properly in weeks and have done little else but cry.
The comfort of his arms is immense, secure and so warm. I inhale the scent of him deep into my lungs as he holds me tight against his chest. He smells divinely familiar, which strengthens me. I already feel better than I did before I passed out.
How the hell can he carry me like this without showing an ounce of exertion? His heart is beating a little fast against his chest, I suppose, but he doesn’t give the impression carrying me across the large room is any great task for him.
Jake lays me down gently on the large four-poster bed and gives me a look of concern, his eyebrows scrunched with worry. “Tell me what to do, Alex.” He sounds panicked. “Do I call an ambulance? What the fuck just happened?”
I shake my head. “No, I’m okay. I just fainted.”
This doesn’t comfort him any, so I offer a small smile. “I haven’t eaten a lot today. I just need to lie down for a bit. I must be coming down with something.”
“That your professional opinion, doctor, or are you trying not to worry me?”
“Both,” I offer.
He nods, looking suspicious, before reaching over to the nightstand to pour me a glass of water from one of the small complimentary bottles.
“How long was I out?” I ask as he hands me the glass.
“Not long, half a minute maybe. I came straight in. What do you need me to do?” He sweeps his concerned gaze over my face, his expression etched with worry as he watches me gulp down the room-temperature water.
“Some chocolate might be good,” I suggest, reaching across to rest the glass on the table by the bed. “Sugar boost.”
He nods again. “Okay, I’ll go find some. Don’t move,” he orders before stalking away with purpose. At the door he fiddles with the latch device before throwing another concerned look over his shoulder and exiting out into the hallway, closing the door behind him gently.
I lie back on the bed and take a few deep breaths. What a bizarre turn of events. I certainly didn’t expect Rob’s wedding day to end with Jake carrying me to bed. I feel a little guilty for abandoning her, but it was she who urged me to run after Jake and fix things.
I haven’t fixed things, but we’re at least in the same room and talking. Well, technically, he’s scraping me off the bathroom floor and getting me chocolate, but it’s basically the same thing.
Perhaps ten minutes later I have my eyes closed when I hear the door open again. I lever myself up as he comes into the room carrying a tray, on top of which is a plate covered with a silver cloche and a large glass of something dark and cold-looking. He sets the tray down on the nightstand, and I shift over slightly so he can sit next to me on the bed. He hands me the glass first.
“It’s Coke. Full fat,” he tells me. “I never let Cale touch the stuff because of the amount of sugar they put in it. He’d be awake for a fortnight.”
Smiling, I take the glass and drink four long, welcome gulps of the dark, sweet goodness. It’s cold and fizzy and tastes divine as it tickles its way down the back of my throat. Jake watches me intently, that same concerned look crossing each of his beautiful features. When I’m finished, he takes the glass back and places it gently on the nightstand then removes the silver lid from the plate.
For the first time I get a look at what he’s brought me. Chocolate cake. A large, gooey slice of rich-looking cake, steam rising from it. My stomach roars at the sight and practically tries to claw its way out of my body to get to it. I could kiss him. I need to kiss him. I love you.
“With cream or without?” he asks, indicating a small silver jug.
I smile. “Is that a euphemism?”
He turns his head to smile at me, and for the first time tonight it’s the Jake smile I used to know. Boyish, warm.
“Without, please. I need pure, unadulterated chocolate.”
“You got it,” he says in a businesslike tone. He reaches across and slices off a bit of the warm, soft chocolate cake then brings the forkful toward me. I’m not sure if he intends to feed it to me or not, but I move forward to take the fork from his hand.
Oh my god. It’s heaven on a fork. Sweet, fluffy, warm, and moist—all the things a chocolate cake should be.
He watches me closely as I swallow before he takes the fork from me to cut off another piece. This time I open my mouth for him as he brings it to my lips. He watches my mouth as I close my lips around it. I think this is the first time I’ve ever had anyone feed me. It feels intense and intimate. And because it’s him, perfectly natural. It’s perfectly natural because I love him.
