“Is it for me?” Her excitement is something that makes me smile. Sometimes it’s easy to forget how much the little things matter when you’re so young.
“There is something for you, yes. You’ll get it on the last day of school, so next week.”
“Yay!” She claps excitedly.
When I notice Kendall’s drawn face, I have to make it better. “I already helped Mrs. Lumier, Kendall. You get something too.” She lights up just as much and pops a piece of chicken in her mouth. She’s a little less animated than her big sister.
“Do I get something too, Mama?” I love that Charlie still calls me mama sometimes. The girls were quick to switch to mommy, and every now and again I even get a mom, which is quickly corrected as they’re far too young to switch to mom.
“You do, Charlie bear. But it’s a surprise for all of you. I’m not going to tell any of you what you’re getting.” I point at the three of them and smile and then turn to Trent. But the smile quickly fades when I realize he’s looking at me with something that’s not quite contempt.
He’s still not happy about our discussion the other day. I thought he’d moved past it, but the closer we get to the reunion, the more unhappy he seems to become. Meanwhile it was by his pushing that we’re even going.
I don’t know what to say to him, not at the dinner table in front of the children, so instead I look down at my plate and push some rice around.
I’ve lost my appetite.
Chapter 18
“Areyousureyouguys don’t want to head up Friday? I don’t mind taking the kids for two nights.” Becca folds a shirt and tosses it in the pile. She’s been known to help me get the laundry done a little faster than in the seven to ten business days it typically takes me.
“I don’t know, Bec. I really don’t. Trent seems irritated with me and just the mere thought of going to this now even though it was basically his idea to begin with.”
“All because of David?”
“I think so. I don’t really know. I’m kind of scared to bring it up.” I mumble the words as I scratch behind my ear and toss some pants onto the pile.
Right now, my bed is covered in kids’ clothes as we fold and sort them.
“Well, what’s his concern?”
“That I’m going to fall in love with David again it seems. Which is preposterous since I was never in love with David to begin with. He was a Bandaid on a bullet wound.”
“Does Trent know that?”
“I’ve told him. Doesn’t mean he’s listened or believes me. And I don’t know, I guess that it’s different in theory than it is in practice. He may be thinking if Iseeand talk to David again that something will suddenly change. I don’t know.”
“Don’t you guys have like, the perfect marriage though?” There’s that damn word again.
As far as she knows, we’re doting and devoted. And we are in many ways. She doesn’t know the trouble in the bedroom, or at least the lack of time in the bedroom. It’s not that it’s our only issue, clearly, but it’s hard to have a strong relationship with somebody when your intimacy is lacking and you barely have time to have an adult conversation. Especially one that’s not about the kids.
“Nothing and nobody is perfect.” This is a party line I use a lot. “You of all people know that we have our issues.”
“I do but in the long run it still seems perfect.”
“Maybe I’m projecting because I don’t want to go and he’s not as irritated as he seems. I don’t know. But having an extra night alone, I don’t know. Maybe it’s worth it.”
“Then go. I really don’t mind having the kids an extra day. And you’re not far, you can always come home for a little bit on Saturday if they’re missing you. But I think it’s better if you two take the weekend and spend some quality time together sans children. It sounds like you need it.”
“I didn’t RSVP for Friday. Do you think that’s a problem?”
“It’s just a meet and greet at the school, right? I wouldn’t imagine it is.”
“Maybe I’ll send a quick email and see if it’s still okay to attend Friday.” I’m mostly talking to myself, but Becca perks up.
“Yeah, you will. Yay. It’s going to be so fun. Your kids are such angels, it’s so nice to have them over. Okay we’ll do pizza like I promised on Saturday and Friday…are you okay with McDonalds?”
I cringe at the thought. It’s not that we’re anti-fast food. It’s just that they’ve been eating less than stellar the past week with me having a few late-night meetings and it being the end of school.
