“What about you?”I need to think about something else, or I’ll keep leaking.If I’ve gotten good at anything in the past few months, it’s compartmentalizing.Grief over Gaia later.Deal with pressing stuff now.My eyes scan Plumeria, who looks...weary to me.“Do you need to eat?”
I won’t eat Gaia,Plumeria says.We became friends.
“What about Gunnar?”Liz’s swords drop.“It’s not our way—I hate it, but I don’t want you to die.You did work on the fountain, and like Gaia, you were still recovering from our escape.You should eat...something.”
Plumeria frowns, but she moves toward Gunnar.
I’m the one who told her to do it, but I still can’t watch.“I’ll just...”I wander back toward the ocean, hoping the sound of the surf will drown out the noise.While I stare out at the ocean, the wind clawing at my exposed skin and making my goosebumps return, I shiver.How did my life turn into this?
It’s like every moment since the blessed came and Ocharta bonded my mom has gotten worse.The few moments of good—all of them with Axel or Azar—only make me sadder.Now I’m starting to question my basic premise from the moment I left the volcano.
Was I right to lie and say I’d lost my memory?
I’m withholding information I would normally have shared with Axel immediately, so that I havesomethingwith which to negotiate.But that’s not something I ever did before.From the start, I was honest.I told him what I was willing to do, and I meant it.Should I just tell him what happened?Should I tell him the decision that lunatic Freya forced me to make?
What if he hates me for it?
I knew the old Azar and the old Axel.I trusted him.
I don’t know anything anymore.It’s like I walked out of the volcano and onto quicksand.A sound awfully close to human retching draws me back toward Plumeria.Is that how dragons sound when they eat?Ireallyhope it is.
I don’t want to look, but I can’t help myself.
Plumeria’s, unfortunately, not eating Gunnar.
She’s puking him back up, along with a strange greenish goo.When she straightens, she looks at Azar, and neither of them look pleased.“What’s wrong?”
Something’s changed,Plumeria says.I can’t keep that down either.
This is bad,Azar says.Very, very bad.
My guilt intensifies.“We need to talk,” I say.“I’ve...remembered something.”
Azar’s head whips my way.What?
She means you should go somewhere with less of an audience.Plumeria’s actually a delight—smarter than I realized.
“Yes,” I say.“Thank you for interpreting.Maybe you should come with us.”I can’t help glancing around at all the other dragons who have gathered.They’re all looking at the telltale neon green puke piles.
Where would you like to talk?
Before I can answer, Asteria flies overhead, circling in search of a place to land.Clearly we’ve been absent too long.Her royal silverness is starting to bug me.She gracefully accepted that Axel cared for me before, mostly, but now that he’s forgotten me, she’s a little too delighted to take advantage.
“Too late now,” I mutter.
Why?Azar looks genuinely baffled.
“I need to tell you something that happened in the volcano, and I don’t think you’re going to like it.”I try pushing my thoughts at him—just him—like I used to.I’m not sure how it’ll work without the bond.It was always hard for me, but now?Your people might be upset.I’d rather talk to you without Asteria or anyone else if possible.
At first, Azar just stares at me.
My message must not have gone through.
But then, just as Asteria lands next to us, he snatches me with one talon again and launches into the sky, mach ten, straight at the place the sun used to be.I’ll be back later.I have to talk to the human.
I don’t consider myself to be a smug person.Usually, I try to be fair and reasonable.But watching Asteria’s startled expression as we disappear is quite satisfying.
How far do I need to go?
