I turned to follow her as a long roll of thunder filled the air. "Why couldn't you make it right?"
"I don't want to talk about that," she shouted over her shoulder, all huffs and rage.
"So you're just going to run away again?"
She stopped, her back to me as she straightened her shoulders and fisted her hands. "I'm not running away from anything. I'm going back to our room because you decided to piss a pointless circle around me in the bar and no one's going to want to dance with me now."
I should've apologized. I should've told her how much the past few days with her had fucked me up. Should've said she was amazing on that dance floor and I'd give anything to watch her a little longer. Should've shut my mouth and walked her to the room. But I found a small well of courage and loosed one of the questions that'd chased me since I was eighteen. "Why did you do it? Why did you go to California?"
A crack of lightning lit up the sky and I saw those words hit her like an open-handed slap. They hit me just as hard.
"Does it even matter?" she asked.
"All of it fucking matters, Audrey," I yelled. "We wouldn't be here if it didn't matter."
She turned around and the skies opened, hard, driving rain soaking us through within seconds. There was no avoiding it.
She pushed her wet hair off her face. "Why didn't you fight for me?"
"What?"
"I didn't run away. My parents canceled my enrollment in Barnard and put me on a plane to California and I didn't have—I couldn't do anything about it. You probably knew that too, because you have a way of knowing everything and then acting like I should explain it all to you. What I want to know is why you didn't fight for me," she said. "It was like you didn't even notice when I left."
I'd known some of that but I couldn't spend any time on the new information because she was missing a few key details. "Are you forgetting the?—"
"I waited for you for three years but you didn't come after me," she yelled. "Ineededyou and you didn't fight. Not until it was too late."
"That's what you think?" I shook my head. I couldn't believe this.
"That's what Iknow," she shot back. "They sent me away and took everything I loved. I lost my whole world in one day and I was all alone foryears. Everything we had was gone like it'd never existed. We were just…over, and it killed me. I barely got out of bed for months. I failed the whole first semester. It was all gone and I had nothing."
Her chin wobbled and I knew she was crying through the rain. My chest cracked open as she turned away. I reached for her arm. "We weren't over," I said, pulling her back. "Not then. Not now."
I cupped her chin and brought my rain-soaked lips to hers for the first time in too fucking long. We crashed together as the thunder roared, her fingers clinging to my chest and shoulders while I gripped the waist of her jeans. Over the downpour, the smokers cheered us on.
Distantly, I knew we couldn't stay out here. We had to take cover. Standing out in the open during a lightning storm was not smart.
"Come here," I said against her lips, and boosted her into my arms. Her long legs went around my waist and her arms circled my neck. I kissed her like there'd never be enough and strode toward the motel, the rain pounding at my back.
I made it across the road and into the parking lot before another burst of lightning pierced the skies. The thunder echoed like the roar of a jet engine off the mountains. We were soaked down to the bone.
None of that stopped me from pushing her up against the door and sinking into the embrace of her body. I ran a hand up the delicate line of her neck and held her steady, my thumb pulling on her bottom lip. "More," I said, claiming her mouth again.
"Jude," she whispered, her fingers in my hair. I almost died from that touch alone.
"I know," I said between kisses. "Fuck, I know."
Everything around us jolted as another peal of thunder broke free. "Inside," she said.
Her legs still around my waist and her lips on my neck, I fumbled for the key. When I finally freed it and opened the door, I carried her inside and perched her on the edge of the dresser. The hole in the ceiling had turned into a waterfall and the lights wouldn't turn on but none of that slowed me down.
We clawed at each other, pulling at clothes and hair and every inch of skin we could reach. There was no patience, no thought, no art to it because we knew this spell could break at any minute and everything would come crashing down.
I rocked into the cradle of her thighs, making no mistake about what she was doing to me and what I wanted to do to her. She groaned like I'd never heard before, her head lolling back and her heels digging into my ass. She ripped at my shirt, nearly strangling me in the process of freeing my arms and pulling it over my head.
"Easy there, princess," I said against her jaw. "You'd be sad if you killed me right now."
She tugged hard on my hair and dragged my bottom lip between her teeth. I was stunned I didn't come on the spot. Honestly stunned. "Not as much as you'd think."
