Prologue
Clara
‘It’ll never happen to me. I’ll never let that slide. I wish someone would. I could NEVER!’These are all phrases I’ve said multiple times in the past. Now they’re flashing through my head while grabbing mine and my sons “go bags”. Heaving the last bag onto my shoulder, and struggling with the other two, the hardwood creaks from behind me. My heart rate skyrockets, instinctively my eyes shut, my breath stutters in my chest, and my body freezes. This can’t be happening right now.
After the longest five seconds of my life I slowly turn my body and open my eyes to find Parker wagging his tail in the hallway. “I’m so sorry baby. I love you so much.” I allow myself to take a few seconds to think about how much we’re going to miss him as he tilts his head at me. Wasting no more time I slowly open the front door, tip-toeing out to my car. Loading up the bags while inhaling deeply, then letting it out on a shaky exhale. I’m positive I’m making the right choice. Making sure I have my keys, I.D., Rhett’s birth certificate, and the small envelope of cash I’ve stashed over the past few months, I slowly make my way back to the front door and open it just enough for Parker to fit through.”Shh, come here, boy.” Parker trots out the door and stays by myside as we walk over to my best friend’s car that’s parked in front of the neighbors house.
Brittany gets out and opens her back door, “Come on Park, it’s time to go to Aunt Britt’s house.” Parker jumps in and Britt shuts the door, turning back to me. She takes one look at my face, I’m assuming it looks like I just did five rounds with McGreggor, and wraps me up in her arms. “I’m so proud of you for taking the steps. I love you so much. You remembered to turn off the ring, right?”
“Yes, the cameras are turned off, my engagement ring is on the counter, I’ve got all our documents, and our go bags.”
Making sure to focus on deep breaths while she tells me, “Good, oh and one more thing.” Unsure if I can handle one more thing, I nod for her to continue. She hands me a burner phone. My hands take it automatically, but I’m unsure what I’m supposed to do with it. “It has my number on it. Call me when you and Rhett stop for some rest. Also, hand me your phone, I’ll toss it on my way home.” My phone’s been completely wiped already, but still I hand it over as requested. I wouldn’t put it past Preston to have a tracker in it. All the evidence of the hell we have lived through for the past five years is already stored onto the clouds of email addresses I made as soon as Preston passed out after drinking himself into a stupor.
I’m well aware that he’s out for the night at this point, but standing in front of my neighbors house at three in the morning is still making me twitch with anxiety. Every bristle of leaves, or squirrels darting across a yard, has me jumping. After one last hug, and a promise to call later today, my legs carry me back over to my old Ford Escape,ironic all things considered.Checking to make sure Rhett is still fast asleepmy eyes catch on the knot forming on his head, making me shutter, as well as the dark blue fingerprints wrapping around his upper arm. Buckling myself up and slowly backing out the driveway, I take in the house I’ve lived in for the past five years. Driving away, I’m watching it disappear in my rear view mirror and say into the silence of the car, “We survived, baby, it has to be up from here.”
1
Chapter One
Clara
*Six Months Later*
Clara!!!!” Startled, my spine straightens, and my heart rate shoots through the roof. I was running through emails and making appointments for my boss when his deep baritone voice scared me.
“Yes, Mr. O’Brien?” Kellum O’Brien’s dad is the owner of O’Brien Accounting Firm. Kellum is the lead accountant, but his dad lives on the other side of the country so he also runs the business. He’s about six foot and some change and looks like he was a linebacker in his past life. He towers over my five foot eight curvy frame and his sandy blonde hair and crystal blue eyes do nothing to calm the nerves I have around him. He can’t be older than early thirties, but that’s just a guess sincewe don’t talk about anything other than business.
I go to work, do my job, clock out, go pick up my son, and try to be the best parent I can be, then get up the next morning and repeat. He’s large, imposing, and demanding, but when he catches the sheer terror in my eyes from the volume of his voice he has the decency to look away from me and gruff out a “Sorry.” Heat rises to my cheeks.
“No, it’s okay really. I was just finishing up before heading out. Is there something you need help with before I go?”
Mr. O’Brien looks back at me and tries to smile, but it looks awkward on his otherwise serious, albeit handsome, face. “Yeah, actually could you clear out my schedule for tomorrow after lunch? I have a very important meeting with Mr. Rowan Byrne that will take up my evening.”
Nodding before he even finishes his sentence, “Of course, I’ll handle that for you right now.”
Mr. O’Brien does that man chin lift thing, “Thanks Clara, I’ll see you tomorrow.” He turns on his heels and heads straight for the door. As quickly and efficiently as I can I move around tomorrow’s schedule. I’m already pushing it on time to get to Rhett. A few more clicks and I’m grabbing my bag and racing out the door.
* * *
Running up the front steps of Olivia’s house I stop at the storm door to catch my breath before making my way inside. Rhett hops up from cleaning up his crayons and coloring book from the kitchen table. He looks right at me, a huge smile takes over his entire face as he runs and jumps straight into myarms hugging my neck. Hugging him back until he wiggles to be put down, I reluctantly set him on his feet. He lifts his hands and starts signing,“I missed you so much! I played with my friends, and my turtles. I even shared!”I give him the biggest smile and sign back.,“That’s so good Little Bear. Let’s get ready to go home. Tell Ms.Olivia and the kids bye.”Rhett runs off to say his goodbyes to Olivia’s kids.
“I’m so sorry, Liv. I got held up.” Olivia Wilson has been our sitter since we landed here six months ago. She’s a few years older than my twenty-seven. Her natural blonde hair is pulled up into a straight ponytail, and her dark blue eyes are shaded by the brim of a forest green “Soccer Mom” hat. She’s about my height but a lot slimmer. I never got my pre-baby body back after Rhett, but Olivia seems to be one of God’s favorites who snapped right back every time.
She waves me off, “Oh, it’s fine. We love having him here! He’s so sweet and fits in perfectly with my kids. I do have to have the kids at practice in like twenty minutes though.”
“Of course, we’ll get out of your way. Oh, I was also going to let you know I’m going to talk to my boss about pushing my hours up so I’d work eight to four. That way even on days I’m working over, you still have plenty of time to get the kids ready and out the house.” I know her kids are in every activity known to man and they usually have to be out of the house by five twenty. Even so she never complains. She’s never made me feel bad about running late, or like Rhett is anything less than an extension of their family.
Rhett loves them all, well except for her husband Cooper. That’s not personal though. He doesn’t like men, full stop. Honestly you can’t blame him after what we’ve been through with his sperm donor. Olivia’s voice derails my thoughts, “That’d be cool. If not, don’t stress about it. We’ll make it work.” Rhett runs back into the room and I take his hand to lead him to the car.
“I’ll keep you updated. Have a good practice, I’ll see you guys in the morning.” A perfectly synced “Byeeeee” from everyone calls out to us as we make our way down the porch.
I get Rhett buckled and slide into the front seat of the two thousand and six Toyota Corolla we had to get once we sold the Escape. We were half way from Arizona to New Jersey when it dawned on me that my car might be getting tracked. I peek in the rear view mirror to see my Little Bear playing with his action figures he keeps in the car to entertain himself. Hitting the interior lights on then off to get his attention, he looks up at me with his always inquisitive bright hazel eyes. “Ready to go home and have dinner?”Rhett tilts his hands left to right as the sign equivalent of clapping his hands. I smile a genuine smile for the first time all day and respond, “Let’s go.”Putting my car in drive we head home to our little two bedroom apartment so I can make what I’m sure will be spaghetti for the third time this week. I’m so over spaghetti, but I’m even more over fighting with a stubborn four year old about dinner.
After an uneventful evening, and an eventful night with a little boy taking up my entire queen size bed, I find myself about five minutes early for work. I’m running through the elevator doors to get to my desk, and trying to catch Mr. O’Brien before his first meeting. Realizing I’m about to look completely disheveled I slow my pace at about twenty feet away to catch my breath. Forcing my fakest smile at the man sitting in the waiting area, disappointment washes over me. I’m starting to realize I’ll have to save this conversation for right around lunch, but not before Mr. Byrne arrives forwhatever meeting calls for an entire evening.
Sitting at my desk my fingers massage my temples, I can already feel a headache coming on. Rhett wouldn’t settle down to sleep. When I finally did get him down he was only asleep for a few hours. He started screaming from a nightmare not long after. I’d love to be able to say this is new or sporadic, but it isn’t. These have been going on since we escaped the grasps of Preston’s poison. My nightmares come just as often, so we usually both end up in my bed before it hits one in the morning. He needs comfort while I need reassurance that he’s safe. Pulling out two ibuprofen and taking them quickly, I settle in for the morning appointments.
By the time ten past noon hits I’m about out of patience and on the edge of my seat waiting for Mr. O’Brien’s last meeting to finish. It should have been over ten minutes ago, but who’s counting? I’m fidgeting for another five or so minutes before huffing out a sigh and giving up. Guess I’ll just make sure I’m back a little early from lunch. Locking up my computer and grabbing my current read, as well as my clearance lunch box with my leftover dinner from last night, I make my way to the break room. Finding my favorite little table in the back corner to settle in to eat. My fingers flip the pages to my bookmark, I’m ready to find out if the guy saves the girl in time. I’m sure it’d be nice to have a man like that. But we don’t need a man to save us, I already did that myself.
