She gives an indelicate snort and quirks a brow at me. “You think I don’t know my boys? I see how he looks at you. That man can’t take his eyes off you.” She grins and touches the sleeve of my blouse. “Sweetie, y’all aren’t fooling anyone. Not with that shirt of yours inside out.”
Ohmygod.
My stomach bottoms out and I jerk my chin down to confirm. Sure enough, my damn blouse is inside out. Because that’s what happens when you get dressed in the dark.
This cannot be happening. Is it possible to literally die of embarrassment? I can’t—
“I never thought I’d see the day,” Mama Hart says, interrupting my shame spiral, “but that man’s got it bad.”
Does she mean—? No. That’s ridiculous. Just because I have feelings for Nick, it doesn’t mean he feels the same way about me. He’s the one who made the rules. He’s the one who said this was just sex.
And yet, earlier tonight, you believed it might be something more.
I really had.
Hope sparks in my chest, a warm glow that has nothing to do with alcohol spreading through my limbs.
“Nick’s been through a lot, and it’s difficult to get close to him, but he’s worth the effort.”
She’s biased, I know that, but she’s also right. I feel it in my bones. Nick is a good man with a good heart. He’s loyal to a fault, and he loves fiercely, with his whole heart. I’ve seen it in the way he cares for his family. In the way he cares for Oreo. In the way he’s trying to change.
And even in the way he held me tonight.
“He’s got a good heart under that surly exterior. You just have to find it,” Mama Hart says, patting my hand. “And if you give him the chance, no man will love you better.”
Chapter Thirty-Six
Nick
It’s Thursday night and I’m hunkered down in my office plowing through email in a desperate attempt to clean out my inbox. I’m meeting Scarlett at my place later, but for now, it’s just me and Oreo. And about three hundred unread emails.
I’m usually good at staying on top of them—I get no less than five hundred a day—but with everything that’s been going on, I’ve fallen behind. It’s not any one thing, but between the Epos launch, the Val social, the late nights with Scarlett, and the alarm at Mama Hart’s earlier this week, I haven’t been clocking nearly as many hours as I should be.
Worst possible time to get distracted, Hart.
“The Epos launch is in four days. There’s nothing more I can do at this point.”
Oreo barks in agreement.
“Easy for you to say.” I reach down and scratch her behind the ears. She tilts her head but continues aggressively chewing her baby Yoda toy. It’s brand new. She’s only had it for a few hours and already one ear is hanging by a thread. I make a mental note to have Rebecca order another, since she likes it so much. “Not that I don’t appreciate the vote of support.”
The fact is, all we can do is watch and wait at this point. The launch will succeed or fail based on all the hard work we’ve done preparing over the last twelve months.
Epos will be a success.
Which is why I should ditch the guilt and wrap up these emails before I head out to meet Scarlett. She’s spent every night this week at my place and though my brain says I’m getting in too deep, I can’t bring myself to care. Not when she’s lying in bed next to me, her soft hair cascading over my pillow with that blissed-out look on her face. She’s so damn beautiful it almost hurts to look at her in those moments. Hurts to know that eventually she’ll be lying in another man’s bed, that another man will have her heart and those quiet moments before dawn when she’s completely at peace.
All we have is the here and now.
And whose fault is that?
It’s my fault. I know that. But knowing doesn’t change the fact that I can’t offer her everything she deserves. My heart. My love. A future.
Talk about irony. Scarlett deserves the world and when it comes to material things, there’s nothing I couldn’t—wouldn’t—give her. Jewels. Cars. Homes.A private fucking island.
But it wouldn’t be enough.
Scarlett won’t settle for anything short of all-in, full-blown, can’t-eat-can’t-sleep love.
