“You know what this means? You get to write an international article outside your column. This can be the beginning of everything! And I’m talking about international exposure here. Multiple translations. Invitations to talk shows.” She smiles wickedly, taking a seat behind her desk. “Of course, I’ll increase your paycheck. Welcome to the big leagues. I’m so proud of you.” She grins as she throws her pencil on her desk, leaning back in her seat.
“You can’t ask me to write an article about myboyfriend’spast.” I shake my head as her dragon’s eyes crash flames at me.
“A good columnist knows how to have the right information. Plus, his secrets won’t stay hidden for long. We need to be the first ones to uncover the truth about what happened to LeBeau’s brother.” She analyzes my reaction, her eyes sparkling at the vision of all the money and fame the magazine could win with my upcoming article. “You know what happened, don’t you?”
“That’s not the point. You know, I can’t write this article,” I assure her. “It will destroy him…” I can’t betray Aaron; no matter what happened between us, I care for him deeply. I can’t be bought. I will not serve her Aaron’s past on a silver platter. I’m not that type of person.
“You need to be a shark if you want to succeed.”
“I’m sorry. I can’t,” I murmur, my voice trembling, fearing what’s next.
“If you refuse, Elle, I’ll make sure no one will ever employ you. I can destroy you.” She leans toward me, her eyebrow arching. “You can kiss your career goodbye, and your reputation.” She shakes her head, a repulsive smile on her face. “I knew this was a bad idea! How could you let your career go to ashes just for a man?”
I swallow my feelings, as I know she won’t hesitate to use her power to ruin me—and Nina could easily. If the media are sharks, she is the megalodon. At my silence, her face softens and a wicked smile stretches on her lips.
“Plus, he is Aaron LeBeau. Is a man really worth sacrificing your whole life? You might be the flag he claimed this season, but he won’t commit to you. Don’t be naive.”
I remain silent for a moment, knowing it already happened. That he claimed me and left.But Aaron has been good to me.“You’re wrong, Nina. Not all men are like—”
She pushes her fists on her table before lifting herself up from her chair, anger in her eyes. “Stop being naive, Elle! You’re being weak! He’s manipulating you!”
“He’s not. Aaron is genuine, kind, generous and loving. He’s—” A smile curves on my face, thinking about him. Maybe she’ll understand? I start regaining hope, thinking Nina wouldn’t mind, but then I meet her icy eyes. The last time I saw this paralyzed expression on Nina’s face was when…he left.
She points her finger at me, her hand and mouth shaking. Oh, no. My hands are sweaty, I feel my pulse on my neck.I shouldn’t have said that.Her eyes are wild, like she’s trying to keep them open so her tears won’t fall on her cheeks. She advances toward me like she’s possessed, scanning me as if I’ve committed an unholy crime.
“I didn’t think it was serious between you.” She stares at the floor blankly, like her soul left her body. She thought I was just using Aaron for information, that’s why she was proud. “But you actually fell for that freaking bastard?” She articulates each word with disgust as she glares at me, making me feel little and ashamed of my feelings.
“Did you fall for him, Elle?” She clutches my arm, and I can’t contain my tears anymore. I cry and betray my feelings. I shake my head—no, I cannot admit that to her. I cannot tell her I went against everything she taught me. She’ll resent me.
She shakes her head as my tears speak for themselves. She lets go of my arm, taking a step away like I’m infected with sickness. “After everything I did for you, everything I taught you! Stupid child, you didn’t listen to me.”
“Aaron isn’t my father,” I howl, my voice begging her to hear me out.
Her eyes meet mine once more, her mouth closes, her lips shaking and curving toward her chin. “Men are the same. They use our weakness against us. He doesn’t love you, he uses you. I read it all about him. This will get you nowhere.”
“Because Stephan did?” Tears fall on my cheeks. Aaron might not be perfect on paper, judging by his background and reputation, but he taught me how to live again. I was a dead rose without petals, just thorns. And thanks to him, I grew back. I regained my petals.
“You messed up things with him last year, and I forgave you. Don’t disappoint me, twice.” I feel my world collapsing. She never wanted to listen to what Stephan did to me. She never knew. She just cared about his superficial, perfect facade of him.
“Stephan broke me,Mother!Because of you! I went with him and suffered because of you!” I cry out and collapse on the floor, my knees at her feet, ready to admit to her the horrible mental torture I suffered. “You don’t know how he treated me and—”
Nina stares in front of her, her chin up, disdaining me. She ignores the tears forming under her eyes and remains like a general at war. No pity. No heart. No love. “I told you to not fall for a man. You can’t put that on me.”But you won’t listen.
“It’s not my love for him that destroys me, Mother. It’s my love for you.”
She’s too proud. Rigid and cold as ice. Her mouth starts to shake again, and one of her tears hits my cheek—but she is still turning a blind eye to the truth. The truth that, by trying to protect me, she broke me and inflict chaos into my life. She took my love. She stole my job by becoming my boss. She made me forget my dreams by trying to accomplish hers.
She created my pretty cage, chaining me into a life I never wanted, breaking my wings. During all this time, I was the bird.
“The article, Elle. It’s your last chance. If you don’t, I’ll never forgive you. You’ll lose me for a man that will play you.”
So this is what’s going to be, losing the hope to find again my mother behind Nina’s mask or losing the man I love who never wanted to be mine in the first place.
I nod, stand up, and leave.
Either way, I’ll lose.
Everlasting
