“I don’t remember that. I was stunned at what had been done to my family. I was so scared, so sad and confused.”
“So angry.” Arim reached for me and pulled me into his lap. “The rage in the room was so strong. The violence grew, a shuddering wind of fury that hurt me. For the first time, your Darkness attacked my Light.”
“But I didn’t.” I frowned, my hand over his chest. “I admit I was in shock. But Arim, I know what I did. I didn’t strike out at you. I was mired in the Darkness of death around me. The frustration and hurt about killed me, that I couldn’t heal Muri or Esel. Sercha was so badly wounded he had no chance.” I blinked away tears, not wanting to cry. Lifting my head, I met his gaze square on. “I destroyed the house in a rage. I threw things, crushed the material possessions that had meant so much to my family and were worthless compared to their deaths. But I know I never tried to hurt you. I only struck back to defend myself after you attacked me.”
Arim frowned and replied slowly, in thought, “I was wrong about you killing your family. But I’m not wrong about what happened that day. So if you didn’t try to hurt me, then someone else did.” He met my shocked gaze with a darkened one of his own. “The killer must have still been there when you, and later I, arrived.”
It took me a moment to respond. “I was there for hours. Why didn’t the enemy attack me?” I shook my head. “That energy was Dark. We both felt it. I know for a fact Sin Garu didn’t do it. I asked around, and his whereabouts back then were confirmed, as were his connections. He was nearly as powerful as Ini.” Could she have done it? Ini had been violent enough, for sure.
Arim grimaced. “We looked into Ini’s involvement when we learned she was your biological mother. She had a perfect motive, but she didn’t do it. We investigated everyone connected with you, Blue. And we learned nothing from the Church we didn’t already know.”
“From the Church?” I scowled. “The corruption in that ‘sacred’ institution rivals the Netharat for sheer evil.”
Arim stroked my hair, his calm acceptance easing my anger. “I wish I could disagree with you. Back then, the Church was the voice of reason. For the most part, they acted with good faith to protect and preserve a joyful way of life for Light Bringers. Now, they seem to be little more than vessels distributing hate and prejudice. Sava’s mentioned as much. I’ve been too busy with a certain Dark Lord lately to thoroughly examine the matter.”
I met his quick kiss and snuggled into his arms, soothed when I’d initially wanted to fight. Damn it all, Arim made me feel like a well-fed kitten. Any longer in his arms and I’d start purring.
Yet I couldn’t make myself leave the comfort of his hold. I scowled at his chest. “None of this makes any sense. If Sin Garu and Balen didn’t do it, and the Church says Ini was innocent, then who had motive to kill Muri and Esel? Like you said, the energy in the house was Dark.”
“Was it?” Arim loosened his hold around me. I felt his rage quivering to be let loose, and I didn’t understand his sudden fury. “Death is a Darkness, especially when murder is involved,” he murmured, his voice low, pained. “What if the rage overlying the scene had been staged? What if someone with a sorcerer’s skill used the energy surrounding the vicious deaths to trap you?”
“Why me? I was no one back then.”
“You’ve always been someone.” He cupped my chin and stared into my eyes. “You were powerful, the beloved daughter of two famous Light Bringer sorcerers — voices who spoke out for Church reform. They wanted an end to an institution that disagreed with anyone not of Light Bringer descent.”
“You think the Church was behind it?” I didn’t understand why this mystery surrounding my foster family’s demise seemed so urgent all the sudden. As if it had happened yesterday, I felt the terrible burden of grief and anger hardening my heart.
Tension blazed, and I had an abrupt desire for some space. “I need a minute.” I nodded toward the bathroom as I rose from his arms.
“Blue —”
“I’ll be right out. I promise.” I raced into the bathroom and shut the door behind me. I stared at myself in the mirror, my eyes wild. Why now? What does it all mean? I shook with suppressed rage, feeling too much when for years I’d existed behind a cold, calculated exterior.
What’s happening to me?
Movement behind me had me turning and raising my hands in preparation to strike. I’d just left Arim outside, so I knew he hadn’t snuck up behind me. And then I remembered that my magic didn’t work here. Shit.
A slap of energy filled the small space as a form coalesced into that of a person I knew.
The green eyes gazing at me were familiar and non-threatening. The glow about the body clearly spoke of the Next.
With horror, I stared at the bleak promise of Tanselm’s demise as it approached me on the legs of the deceased.
ARIM
The minute Lexa left, I felt as if something had clenched my heart and yanked it hard away. I rubbed my chest, my appetite no longer for anything resembling food and everything that reminded me of the black-haired, blue-eyed spitfire I couldn’t stop loving.
Now that I’d released the floodgates, allowing my emotions free rein, I could no longer deny how much Lexa still meant to me.
I could only hope her desire to escape had more to do with bodily need than emotional heartbreak. I could understand the puzzle of her family’s death being hard to swallow no matter how they’d died or how much time had passed, but Lexa had to know we were in this together. No more castigation. No more Light versus Dark. Blue and I were a team, and we would be forever, until —
I clutched my chest again, this time in genuine pain. Agony ripped through me. I seized, falling off the couch onto the floor as my mind was torn from the one person in life with whom I shared an unbreakable bond.
Ravyn.
Chapter 20
Lexa
