The young people put their heads together in order to solve this thorny problem. Fairfax gave up with some reluctance his spur-of-the-moment plan to take Miss Jamieson driving. He did not wish to trap himself into a situation in which all thetonwould expect him to make the girl an offer. He really did not think he would ever consider her seriously as a prospective bride. Certainly he did not want his hands to be tied. He had spent long enough with her the evening before. Better to wait a few days before singling out her company again.
He exchanged glances withSedgeworth, and they both rose to take their leave.
Sedgeworthcommiserated with his friend as they rode away. "You couldn't penetrate the defenses of all those lovelorn swains, eh, Fairfax?" he said. "What a waste of a visit, my friend, having to sit clear across the room from the beauteous Miss Jamieson."
"Ah, but, Sedge," Fairfax said, "didyou not notice that I was the first person singled out for invitation to the picnic next week? I confess I took heart from that fact. You merited only second place."
"True enough," his friend admitted. "But I still have a place of great honor. Think how lowering it would be to have been lumped in with Max and Peter andAmbie.Poor souls.You'd think they would have more pride, wouldn't you, Fairfax? At least we are 'my lord' and 'Mr.Sedgeworth.' "
"I fear perhaps the mark of respect is only for our advanced age, though," Fairfax said. "After all, we are both approaching thirty and must appear quite aged to those very young creatures. Were we ever as young as that, Sedge?"
Jane received her second proposal of marriage later that same afternoon. The first she had refused five years before because the man had seemed impossibly dull beside the glittering personality of the quite unattainable Viscount Fairfax.The second she refused—for what reason?Jane asked herself when she was back at home again.Surely not for the same reason.She could not possibly be that foolish. Could she?
She was afraid she knew the answer. Every man she met now would be measured against the viscount and found wanting. And in a few months' time she would return to Yorkshire and spend the rest of her life repenting her extreme folly. There was nothing whatsoever wrong with Mr.Fafordas a suitor. He had the means to support her. He was a man of steady character. He was kindly. And she had refused him.
He did not have thick dark hair that her fingers itched to run through or a tall, muscular body her own ached to be held against. He did not have blue eyes that looked intently into hers as she talked. He did not have a left eyebrow that lifted expressively to show surprise or amusement. He did not have the gift for conversing in a manner that made her forget herself, her surroundings, and the time. She did not throb with love for him.
But he did have a regard for her and a wish to make her his wife. And why ache for dark hair and blue eyes and a muscular body when she knew they would never belong to her? Foolish, foolish infatuation!
She surprised herself by her refusal. She hardly knew that she was going to say no until her mouth opened and formed the word. Mr.Fafordwas surprised too, though he was too well-bred to make much comment on her reply. They drove home from the park inembarrassedsilence. He asked her at the end of the journey if her answer was final, whether there was any hope of her changing her mind if he asked her later in the Season.
But she refused even this second chance. She might have said yes and concentrated on talking sense into herself over the coming weeks. She said no.
So she was making an utter fool of herself again, pining for a man who would probably wed her cousin within a few months. She had learned nothing whatsoever in five years. She heartily despised herself. She dared not look ahead to the future.
Chapter Five
Honor's conversation consisted of little else except her picnic until the following Tuesday. She was in a fever of excitement. What should she wear?sheasked both Jane and her mother a dozen times.Her pink?Did pink really suit her?The sprigged muslin?She felt it was quite becoming, but what ifPruedecided to wear hers? The two dresses were very similar. Her pink bonnet was her favorite. If she wore that, then of course she would be wise to wear the pink dress. But perhaps her chip straw bonnet would be more suitable for a picnic. The yellow would be a quite striking choice, though, would it not? The sun would complement it if it turned out to be a bright day. The dress would give the day sparkle if it were cloudy.
Lady Jamieson listened indulgently to her daughter's prattling. It was left to Jane to see that the picnic was properly organized. It was she who conferred with the cook about the variety and quantity of food required, the number of footmen needed to serve it, and the number of carriages necessary to convey the ladies. She guessed that the men would prefer to ride.
Jane was not at all sure that she was looking forward to Tuesday. She liked the sound of the setting, and it was always pleasant to be out-of-doors during spring and summer. But it would mean a whole afternoon spent in proximity to Lord Fairfax. And she was realizing more and more that being near to him was the worst thing in the world for her. She could not think or behave sensibly, it seemed, while there was still the chance of seeing him and perhaps talking to him. She almost wished that Honor's hopes would be realized and that he would court her quickly andmarryher. At least then perhaps she would be able to face reality again.
Oh, but the very prospect was dreadfully depressing. She liked Honor a great deal. Who could not?But not as Lord Fairfax's wife.She was not right for him. Honor was good-natured, despite her vanity, and she had a great deal of intelligence and talent that she ruthlessly suppressed now that she was in London. But she was certainly flighty. She loved gaiety. She would not suit his way of life at all. She was beautiful, of course. And he seemed to like beautiful women. No one had been lovelier than Susan, and he had very obviously loved her deeply. Perhaps he would love Honor too. Some men do not require steadiness of character in their wives.
But Honor did not like children. When she had come to Yorkshire with Aunt Cynthia and Uncle Alfred to bring Jane to London, she had been quite cross with Harold's children. Jane's brother had brought them to the house to say good-bye to her. Honor had thought them unruly and had raised her eyes to the ceiling when little Andrea had shrieked as Jane lifted her, kissed her, and swung her in a circle.
Fairfax appeared to dote on his children. Honor would find life very hard if she were forced to have a great deal to do with them. Jane had overheard her discussing the matter with Aunt Cynthia one morning. If she married the viscount, Honor was saying, she would make him take her everywhere of any interest in the world. She would make sure the children had the best of care, but she would not wish to spend all her time with them at Templeton Hall.
Jane ended up sighing every time her mind strayed to such topics. She must just make sure on Tuesday that she kept herself busy. She would have to see that a suitable picnic site was chosen, of course, and she would have to instruct the footmen when to serve the tea. If she did not, no one else would. But that would not fill in her whole afternoon. She must try, if she could, to engage Mr.Sedgeworthin conversation. He had appeared quite friendly at the soiree, and he might help her keep her mind away from his friend.
They saw the viscount once during the days before the picnic. Jane and Honor were walking along
Bond Street
, a maid behind them, when they came face-to-face with him. He raised his hat, bowed, and would have passed on, Jane felt, after greeting them. But Honor had other ideas.
"Lord Fairfax!" she said. "You are just the person we havebeen needing. We are desperately in need of the services of a discerning gentleman. Do say you are not in a hurry."
Fairfax stopped and looked at her, his left eyebrow raised. "In what way may I be of service, Miss Jamieson?" he asked.
Jane too had looked at her cousin in surprise.
"It is Papa's birthday very soon," Honor said, all dimples and large eyes, "and I wish to purchase a new fob for his watch. Jane and I have been quite undecided about which one he would like. We have come very near to quarreling, in fact. What we need is the opinion of a gentleman of taste."
"And you wish me to help you make the choice?" he asked. "I would be honored, ma'am, though I am sure your papa would value anything that you selected for him."
"Oh, will you help?" Honor asked breathlessly. "I would be most grateful, my lord." She reached for his arm and turned to Jane. "You may go on to the library, Jane. You know I find that place a terrific bore. Jane is very learned, you know, Lord Fairfax. Now, I am just a giddy young girl who prefers to let the gentlemen of this world do all thinking and reading.Hatty, you may go with Miss Matthews. His lordship will accompany me to the library afterward. Will you, my lord?" She turned wide, innocent eyes on him.
