“Tess.” Levi tried to cradle my face, and I shoved his hands away, scuffling in the dirt to get away. It was too much. The world was collapsing in on me, the weight of it pressing down with each strangled cry I made. He couldn’t have him. I refused to give Luke up, to hand him over like some sacrificial lamb.
“He can’t have my baby,” I wailed, my voice cracking on each gasping sob. My eyes squeezed shut so hard, sparks flashed behind my eyelids. I couldn’t exist without Luke. He was everything to me, my tether to reality, my reason for getting up in the morning. He was the only thing that kept me alive most days.
“I know. I won’t let him. He’s not getting anywhere near you, Tess. Neither one of you.” He sounded so sure, but he didn’t know Jeremy, not like I did.
I shook my head, my forehead rolling in the dirt. “You don’t get it.” I looked up at him, and he was on the ground with me, his eyes full of anguish. “He’s never going to stop until he gets what he wants.”
Levi’s hands cradled my jaw, but I couldn’t feel their usual warmth. “You’ve got to take a deep breath.” His voice, usually velvet-smooth and rich, was garbled as if I were underwater. He inhaled through his nose and blew it out of his mouth so I could mimic it. But my mind and body wouldn’t connect.
“I c-can’t,” I sobbed.
“Yes, you can. Come on, sweetheart, do it for Luke.” He did the slow breathing again. I white-knuckled his wrists, but he showed no sign of discomfort. I did a poor imitation of his breathing, trying to think of what Delilah said about the bath, but it wasn’t working.
“Tell me three things you can see.” I just kept crying, unable to focus, but his grip tightened on my face, forcing me to. “Tell me what you see, Tess.”
“Y-Your eyes.” They were so interesting this close. Captivating. Distracting. Different shades of green and gold and brown swirled all into one beautiful mix that was illuminated by the sun. Focusing on them became a little easier the longer I stared into them, the sharp edges of my panic dulling.
“Yes, I’m here. Always here for you. What else? Two more.”
I looked up, fresh tears rolling down my cheeks. “The s-sky.” I looked past him, my vision clearing. “The house.”
“Good. That’s good.” He stroked the back of my head, curling his fist into my hair tenderly. “What are two things you can feel?”
“Your hand in my hair.” He wasn’t pulling on it, but more of a gentle tug to let me know he was there. It felt good, grounding in a way I couldn’t explain.
He nodded, his eyes darting between mine quickly. “I like it. It’s soft. Beautiful. Just like you. One more.”
My heart began to slow, my panting subsiding. My grip loosened on his wrist and slid up to his hand, my eyes drifting shut as the warmth of him bled into my cheek. “Your hand on my face. It’s warm.”
“Yes. Perfect, Tess.”
I let my eyes stay shut, and the chaos inside me faded more with each slowing heartbeat. I focused on Levi and the sound of his breathing. Let his touch anchor me in this moment.
“I’m not going to let anything happen to you,” he said, his voice rough. “I’m going to fix this, okay? Don’t worry about a single thing.” His thumb stroked my cheek. “I’m going to keep you and Luke safe.”
“I know,” I whispered weakly, and that was the truth.
The air between us was still heavy, but it wasn’t crushing me anymore. My face stayed pressed into Levi’s palm, the faint trace of his cologne wrapping around me like a blanket. His thumb brushed over my cheek again, his eyes locked on mine like I was the only thing that mattered to him.
I swallowed, my throat raw. “The other day?—”
He shook his head, stopping me. “Not now. Let’s get you inside,” he murmured.
I let him pull me to my feet, though my legs felt unsteady. His hand stayed on my back, supportive and sure, while he guidedme toward the house. His pants were covered in dirt and dust. “Your pants.” I sniffled, feeling guilty.
“I’m more worried about you than some pants, Tess. You’re all that matters to me right now.”
But as we crossed the yard, I realized I wasn’t just walking toward the house.
I was walking straight into whatever storm Jeremy was sending my way.
But thankfully, this time, I wasn’t walking alone.
12
Levi
It’d been two days, and yet I still hadn’t come up with something to save Luke. To save Tess.
