26
WYATT
After leaving Edith, Wyatt had spent the next few days in London. He had a few meetings he could have done online, but decided that getting away from Cornwall for a bit would be better for him and Edith. But now he was packing ready to return to Porthpenny. Tonight, there was a pre-wedding beach party for the happy couple, and so he needed to be there.
As he folded his clothes and tucked them into his bag, he thought about the night he’d spent with Edith. It had been wonderful to kiss her, hold her and sleep next to her again. He had allowed himself to imagine a future where he could wake up beside her every day and finally know he would spend the rest of his life with the woman he loved. Because he did love her. More than he had ever loved anyone. And that was why, when his mother had phoned — while Edith was making breakfast — and brought his New York history crashing into Edith’s home, he had known that he couldn’t possibly do it again.
Edith was a good person, kind and generous with her time and love, and she did not deserve to have her life tainted with Wyatt’s problems. Sometimes loving someone meant that you had to set them free, not tie them down with your bullshit.
Zipping up the bag with more force than was necessary, he picked it up and dumped it on the floor by the door. He went back into the room and did a quick sweep to check he hadn’t left anything. In the bathroom, he found his toothpaste, so he picked it up and paused as he caught sight of himself in the mirror. In the harsh lighting, he had purple shadows under his eyes, thin lines around his mouth. For a moment it hit him that this was how he would look in another ten or twenty years.
Life passed so quickly, and he’d spent so much of his wishing things were different. The feeling went right back to his childhood, when that awful day had brought so much pain to him and his family and changed the trajectory it should have followed. Things should have been so different and so much better.
If only he’d been able to prevent what happened that day and change the way things went afterwards. The events of that day forever tainted his life, his mother’s, and everyone who knew them. That was the thing with tragedy; it followed you for the rest of your life, however hard you tried to outrun it. And, of course, he didn’t feel that he deserved to escape the reality of what he’d done. He felt he should be punished because he had let down the one person who relied on him for protection. That was, he knew, unforgivable.
He shook his head at his reflection, then returned to the room and tucked the toothpaste into his bag. Outside in the hallway, he pulled the door closed and headed for the lifts.
While he waited, his mother’s call hovered at the edges of his mind, like an annoying fruit fly. She’d asked about Edith, of course she had, her curiosity edged with raw negativity. Wyatt had never shared much about Edith with her. He’d been afraid to in case she asked him what right he had to be chasing happiness.And yet, somehow, she knew he was with Edith, as if she could see across the miles.
Explaining to his mother how conflicted he was would have been pointless. She would never understand the way he felt about Edith or how he felt torn about being with her and bringing his mess into her life. His past threatened to poison the fragile connection that existed between them, and he knew his mother would never try to assuage his worries or soothe his restless heart. She blamed him fully for what had happened, and she always would, and knowing that made it nearly impossible for him to let up on blaming himself.
And so he had reassured her as well as he could. He had brushed aside her concerns with the skill of a son who had spent the best part of his life hiding the vulnerable parts of himself in order to protect his mother. But as he’d ended the call, the guilt had risen inside him like bile — guilt at what he’d put his mother through, guilt at hiding the truth from Edith and guilt at knowing he was going to walk away from Edith for the second time.
The lift pinged, and the doors opened. Wyatt stepped inside, his bag over his right shoulder. He pressed the button for the ground floor and exhaled as it descended.
He’d soon be back in Porthpenny, where he’d see Edith again. Would she acknowledge him or turn away as if he did not exist? She had every right to act as if he didn’t. If she spoke to him, she might act as if nothing had happened and the night they’d spent together had been of no consequence to her.
Perhaps it hadn’t.
Perhaps for her it had been a way to say goodbye.
He would prepare himself for every eventuality, and hopefully, whatever happened then would sting less. Although being ignored by Edith would be dreadful, it might be easier for him than knowing that their night together meant nothing. Even the prospect of her shouting at him would be better than indifference because at least then he would feel that she was treating him with the anger he deserved.
The lift reached the ground floor, and the doors opened. Wyatt stepped out into the bright lobby, reminding himself that he was heading back to Cornwall for his friend’s wedding and it should be a joyous time, not one of sadness.
He would ensure that he put every effort into being thebest-best man he could be.
Even if his heart was breaking, he would not show it because he wanted Titus and Finn to have a wonderful wedding at The Cornish Garden Café.
27
EDITH
‘That’s perfect,’ Edith said as she looked around. ‘Well done and thank you.’
The catering company had delivered the buffet for the beach party and brought along their barbecue van for hot meals. Everything had been set up on the beach under a large open marquee, and people had already started arriving. It was the eve of the wedding eve, and she couldn’t believe that it was finally here.
Finn and Titus were due to arrive soon, and she knew they were both very excited. She’d spoken to them earlier that day when she’d wanted to double-check that she’d catered for everyone’s dietary requirements.
It was a very exciting time, and despite the way she’d felt since Wyatt had left her home, she could feel her spirits lifting at the prospect of seeing her friends getting married. She’d have had to be a robot to have been immune to the joy of the occasion.
‘Hi, Edith.’ Rosie had appeared at her side.
‘Hello, lovely. How are you?’
Rosie flashed her a grin. ‘Feeling good, thanks. I’m actually really looking forward to the wedding now.’
‘I’m thrilled to hear that.’ Edith touched Rosie’s arm.
