Also, a hard no.
The last few texts were ridiculous. She’d inquired about food allergies, if I had any sexual kinks, and if I was open to threesomes.
To say that I didn’t want to be here would be a massive understatement.
“I’m totally down for shots,” Jeanne said, and Tim gave me an apologetic look, as he didn’t seem thrilled about being here either. Benjihad a wicked grin on his face because he was enjoying the fact that I was miserable.
“I’m going to stick to a beer,” I said, and Tim asked for the same.
“Great. Well, you two can do your thing, but me and Julia are going to have a good time,” Jeanne said with a big smile on her face.
“Yes. Our men can take care of us tonight,” Julia said, leaning against me in the booth.
What the hell was going on? We barely knew one another. I hadn’t agreed to anything more than four friends having dinner.
Thankfully, Benji soon returned, and the two women downed the shots in a matter of seconds. We placed our dinner orders, and Julia requested another round of shots for her and Jeanne, as well as some Long Island iced teas.
Tim looked a little panicked, since Jeanne wasn’t a big drinker.
Benji and I traded a look, and I knew I’d be getting a text from him later tonight about the madness that was this moment.
I took a long pull from my beer as Jeanne told us all about her PTA meeting today and the fundraiser they had planned next month.
“I was hoping you’d help me again with building the set for the spring performance this year,” Jeanne asked as Benji set down two new shots of tequila for the ladies as well as their Long Island iced teas.
“Let’s drink to Charlie building a sexy prop for the kids!” Julia reached for her shot glass and clinked it with Jeanne’s, and they both tipped their heads back.
“Not quite sure a sexy prop for a kid performance is the goal.” Tim reached for his beer bottle and took a sip.
“Well, I just think being a single dad is sexy. And I think you’re sexy,” Julia said to me. “And do you know what else I think is sexy?”
I didn’t respond. I just stared at her, because this wasn’t a conversation that I felt like having. Julia was sucking down her Long Island iced tea like she was preparing for an episode ofGirls Gone Wild, and Jeanne was leaning against Tim as if she was already two sheets to the wind.
“Well, I’ll tell you,” Julia said, keeping her voice low. Benji was back and setting our dinner plates in front of us. “A limp dick is never a bad thing, Charlie. There are work-arounds.”
What the actual fuck?
“Thanks for the fun fact,” I said, turning my attention to the burger in front of me.
Benji chuckled as he walked off, and my phone vibrated shortly after with a text from him that was simply an eggplant emoji. I guess she was speaking louder than I thought she was.
I responded with a head-exploding emoji.
“Try to take a few bites of your chicken sandwich, baby,” Tim said, pulling the plate closer to his wife.
“Okay. My man is taking care of me, I guess.” Jeanne’s eyes were already showing signs of intoxication, and her words were slurring. But she reached for her cocktail and sucked half the glass down through her straw.
I had a feeling this date would be ending much sooner than anticipated, and I was fine with that, but I felt bad that Jeanne was going to be sick as hell tomorrow.
Julia held her glass up and whistled to get Benji’s attention. She held her glass up and two fingers, and he nodded.
“I don’t think Jeanne needs any more to drink,” Tim said, and I could hear the irritation in his voice.
“She never goes out. Let her have some fun,” Julia said, turning her attention back to me. “Speaking of never going out. Why don’t I see you out much?”
“Because I work and have a child to raise. I go out plenty, but I’m not downing shots anymore. I’ll have a beer or two with the guys, and that suits me just fine,” I said before reaching for my burger and taking another bite.
“But I bet you like your woman tipsy and relaxed, huh?”
