I shook my head.We need to bring back shame.
Maisie snorted. “Hey, none taken. This pussy is enchanted to resist even this super spreader event made into a person.”
“Y’know,” Cody said, narrowing his eyes toward his sister. “I think that’s mighty stinking rich coming from a girl whose gut is the third most populous sperm bank in the area.”
“Cody, I think it’s in your best health interest not to talk to me. It’s not very girl’s girl of me to break your dick like a Kit-Kat bar when Maisie likes it for whatever reason.”
“Why are you all like this?” I asked, flatly.
“Like what? Perfect? Hot? Emotionally avoidant but excellent in bed?” Cody offered.
“If she’s talking aboutyou,” Nat jumped in, “you need to add riddled with daddy issues and a crotch that’s seen more glitter and ass than a Pride float to that list.”
“IamPride.”
A third and final screen appeared then. Calm as ever, Cole lounged in a heather-gray hoodie with Simone’s head resting on his shoulder. With the throw blanket over both of them and Simone lazily moving her hand over his chest, they screamed emotionally stable and steady to a degree on par with me and Byrd.
“Bro, no,” Cole scrunched his nose, hearing what Cole had just said. “You’re a cautionary tale that they should teach in sex ed classes nationwide.”
I closed my eyes for a moment and rubbed at my temples, sending a litany of curses in Spanglish into the atmosphere. Hunters didn’t get headaches, but these three loved to test that. “I’mthe one who calledyou three, remember?”
I heard Cole readjust before I opened my eyes to see his drawn eyebrows. “Yeah, calling all of us at once? This must be serious. What’s up, Q?”
Everyone else realized how right Cole was as they sat up straighter or focused with renewed intrigue. I inhaled deeply. This level of attention was something I would have to get used to soon. I zeroed in on the second tile of the video call in the top right of my phone. “I need intel. Natty? What do you know about what Byrd has planned for my birthday trip?”
Nat lifted her eye mask to narrow her blue eyes at me. The color seemed to darken with the same dramatic suspicion that drew out each word she said, “We talked about it at lunch today… But, I’mnotspoiling the surprise.”
“I don’t want you to. I need your help, though. I needallof your help, actually.” I hesitated for just a second, gathering my will to voice what I had only just thought about a few moments prior. I paused long enough for all of them to lean in like wolves scenting blood.
Finally, I said, “I want to propose?—”
Simone gasped so hard she accidentally swallowed the gummy worm she was eating. Then, she screamed so loud that not only did I wince and jerk back, but I was pretty sure I heard the pop of something in my phone speakers.
“OHMIGODS, YOU ARE PROPOSING THEN?!”
“It’s about time!” Maisie hollered in celebration.
Cody pretended to wipe a tear from his eye. “Our little emotionally-stunted rage muffin is finally growing up.”
“Call me a rage muffin again,” I said too calmly, “and I will make you have to piss in a bag for the rest of your immortal life.”
“Okay, but on yourbirthday?!” Nat wrinkled her nose at the idea. “I told you that I’m not releasing the ring into your custody unless it’s theperfectday, not just some random Tuesday that you wanted to do because Byrd scrunched her nose in a way you liked or something.”
I rolled my eyes. “That soundsnothinglike me?—”
“Thattotallysounds like you,” Cody and Cole said in perfect, insufferable unison.
“I’m just saying, birthdays are basic and boring. Do you really want your proposal to share a party hat with your birth trauma and every shitty party we have had in its honor?”
“Wow. Thank you, Natty-Light, Queen of Romance over here.” I folded my arms.
“I, for one, think it’s sweet. Romantic, even,” Cole said, squeezing Simone close to him while looking down at her with a smile full of love. “Especially considering we’ve all had shitbirthdays our whole lives. I can’t think of a better way to change that around.”
“Yes! And don’t worry!” Simone squealed, finally breathing properly again. “Maisie and I knowexactlywhat Byrd’s dream proposal looks like!”
Chuckling, Cole shook his head. “I don’t think knowing what she likes is the part Quinny’s asking for help with, babe.”
Nat’s expression became utterly horrified. “Wait, you want us to domanual labor, don’t you?”
