“Hmm? What is it?”
“You got school?” AJ asks, when TJ clams up. I watch boththeir faces and wonder if AJ is asking TJ’s question or if he’s just asking one of his own. I’ve heard stories about twins thought-sharing. It wouldn’t surprise me if these two could converse in their heads. God knows they barely speak out loud.
“Not today,” I tell them.
“School is every day,” TJ mutters. Smart kid. Ishouldbe going to classes. I have two today that I’m missing, but I can’t knowingly leave them with Dad after he threatened Casey. In fact, maybe I should get them out of here for a while? Get that sun they so obviously need.
“Yes, school is every day. But for today I’m staying here with you. Maybe later we can go to the park?” I offer, and three genuine smiles greet me. Even Casey understands the word and what it means. “Eat up first. In a little while, I’ll come find some clothes and help you get dressed.”
“Can we leave Daddy at home?” AJ asks.
“Yeah, we’ll leave bad Daddy here for today.”
I feel lighter once I make the decision. I might fail, but I’m trying my best.
I step into the hallway, ready to finish cleaning the kitchen, only to run face-first into my dad.
“Stop! Dad, stop.” But he doesn’t stop. He yanks on my hair harder and pushes my face further into the wall. Any more pressure and he’s going to fracture my skull. My eye already feels like it’s trying to squeeze into my brain just to escape the hard edge of the doorframe.
“You think you can poison my boys against me?” Spittle hits my cheek before he grabs it with his free hand and pounds my head against the frame twice. Black spot dance in my vision with bright white stars bursting between them.
The boys are screaming my name over and over, and Casey’s just screaming. If they don’t stop, they’ll draw his attention. I need to close the door, but he’s holding it open with my body pressed to the frame.
“I don’t need to poison anyone against you. You do that all on your own!”Shut up Jules, shut up,my brain screams, but self-preservation takes a backseat to getting that door closed.
He smashes my skull again, then yanks me toward the living room so fast that I can’t catch my footing to follow. I hit the floorhard, but Dad doesn’t stop. I feel individual hairs ping when he pulls them right out of my scalp as he hauls me along, and then he kicks me in the stomach for making him go to the effort of dragging me.
Out of the corner of my eye, I catch TJ’s blue pyjamas streak by as he grabs Dad’s leg, diffusing the power behind the second kick, but not preventing it altogether. Dad grabs TJ by the throat and hauls him into the air. My stomach sinks. I pull myself up as fast as I can, but what can I do?
“You’re fucking pathetic!” I scream. I’ve got to draw him back to me. “You think you’re a big man, hurting little kids?” His eyes blaze and promise death, but I’m not afraid of death. These days, I only fear it being my best means of escape.
He puts TJ down and backhands me across the face. I cut the inside of my cheek on my teeth and wince as blood pools in my mouth. I nudge my head at TJ telling him to get back to his room, but Dad hooks him by the collar and grins.
What the fuck now? How much more do I have to take?
“These aremyboys, Juliet. They’ll be Feelan men. I support them. They’ll eat when I feed them. They’ll do what I tell them.”
“They’re not wild dogs, Dad! They’re kids. You don’t give a shit about any of us. You can’t even protect them from yourself. Did you know they saw you hit Mum yesterday? Can’t you even shelter them from that?”
He laughs. The sound is wicked and depraved. There’s no arguing with him. He doesn’t care what they see or what they hear.
“I’m teaching them that no bitch is worth their care. Not siblings, not mothers, not wives. They’remen—they’re the top of the food chain—and if their women step out of line, they’ll do what’s right and whip them back into shape.”
“Fucking neanderthal.”
“Get on the floor. On your knees.”
“Fuck you.”
He lifts TJ by his collar. His little hands scramble for the bunched cloth now cutting into his throat.
“Stop!” I yell.
“On your knees,” he reiterates.
I do what he wants. He puts TJ back on his feet.
“Andrew James, get out here!” AJ’s head peeks around the door. Dad glares until AJ stumbles out into the hallway. “Hurry up. Stand next to Thomas Joseph. You’re going to learn how to be Feelan men, today.”
