My voice cracks. “Most people hang on until they perish, too. You saw it sooner than I could have, and I’m grateful you got us out. If that’s selfish, then I’m selfish, too.”
“I wanted her back so bad. I kept trying and failing; nothing worked. The worse it got, the more I worried we wouldn’t make it. Still wish for that fucking miracle, like an idiot, though,” he says.
“Hunter. Staying would have been the selfish choice—the foolish choice. What, just so you could say you were there? Go down with the ship? It would have changed nothing.”
He tilts his head. He hadn’t thought about it like that before. “You’re right. Shit, I …” he trails off.
“If we’d stayed, we would have more scars, more heartbreak, more emotional damage. Instead, we got by with a few bumps and bruises.” But even as I say that, I know Hunter’s got more than a little road rash from the Mom crash out.
I’m the lucky one.
He takes a breath. “Okay, I believe you, and I’m gonna try to let go of that guilt, and I guess I have to admit that…” he huffs a sigh. “If you’re wise enough to help me crawl out of my childhood trauma, even a little bit, you’re wise enough to choose who you love, too. I’m not sorry for punching him in the face.”
I laugh. “I doubt he’s sorry for breaking your nose.”
He pulls me in for another hug, his ribcage rises and falls a few times before he finally releases me. Hunter pats my face. “Maybe I’ll ship you off to school in Greece.”
“Ah, about that.”
“You don’t want to go to school. I know.”
“How?”
“I’ve seen you happier while sitting through my—what do you call them?—Hunter brand TED talks on responsibility.”
“I’m that bad of an actor, eh?”
“To me you are. And you weren’t fooling me about Travis either, for the record. I was trying to limit your time with him until the season started. I thought you’d work him outta your system in small doses.”
I grin—that’s kind of endearing for the big lug.
“But about school, I’m good to my word, Hunt. I said I’d go, and I will.”
He crosses his arms, studying me. “I have half a mind to hold you to that.”
I take a sharp inhale.
“And if you think I’m the kind of ‘father figure’ that’s gonna give you some song and dance about not doing things ‘just’ to make me happy, you don’t know me so well. I’d accept you doing it to please me if it got you there. I think post-secondary school’s important.”
I deserve a fucking award for not pointing out that he never went to post-secondary school, but I’m sensing a but. Please, for the love of god, say there’s a but. I’ll stick to my word, buuuuut kinda hoping he’ll let me off the hook.
“But,” he says. “I’m also a sucker for seeing you happy, and watching you miserably fill out those applications was killing me. Going through it was good, though. Made me realize that it’s never too late. You can have a long hockey career and go to school later.”
I sigh. “In other words, I’m not off the hook for that one yet.”
“Nope.” He grins. “The money will be there for you when you need it. Besides, I don’t exactly have it right now … I gave the money to Mom.”
“What?Hunter.”
“I’d sorta given up on you ever going. I was fucking shocked when you said you would. I’d have replenished a year’s worth by the time you had your first semester, but this way I have time to build it up.”
I don’t bother arguing that he doesn’t need to pay for school for me. I know he won’t have it any other way.
“That’s why you’ve been working overtime.”
He nods.
“Hunt, you gotta stop giving her money like that. Please.”
