‘That’s my car,’ Nash whispers.‘They’re here already.’
‘Stay.Don’t go.’
‘I have to.’
The cat loudly miaows in protest, and Nash bends down to stroke them between the ears.
Christopher steps aside to let Nash past, but can barely follow him towards the door.If he hangs back, maybe it’ll prolong this goodbye?There must be something he can do to slow Nash down.
But it just means that he watches Nash pick up his case from the top of the stairs, while he grips the back of the couch, knuckles white with desperation.
‘Don’t hate me, Christopher.’
And with that, Nash Nadeau is gone from his life, forever.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Christopher
Christopher doesn’t get out of bed for two days.
At the end of the second day, Shaz breaks into the flat and finds him and the cat curled up in their misery pit.She joins them, holding him while he cries through this terrible heartbreak.
He knew Nash would leave.He knew they could only be temporary.
The trouble was that he had dared to imagine that it could be a fairy tale ending, where somehow they’d find a way to exist together.Either way, he deserved a proper goodbye, an ending that resolved some of their feelings and gave him somewhere to put all this hurt.
On the bedside table, he finds one of Nash’s cards, the very same kind he gave to Myffy.His number.Nash might see it as an olive branch, but it’s one that Christopher is not ready to take.He throws it into the rubbish.
On the third day, he finally notices the snow has gone.Completely, utterly gone.The whole world has gone back to normal while he’s been crying in the dark.He takes Nash’s card out of the bin and goes back to bed with the cat.
On the fourth day, he finds Tegan downstairs in the bakery and he does start to wonder whether, between Tegan and Shaz, there is some kind of familial ability to break into places they’re not supposed to be.
‘Life goes on,’ she announces with the kind of deep solemnity only teenagers can manage.Apparently, things with her and Danny from the shop had not been going well either.
But she was right.It was time to get back to work, and even if he didn’t feel able to open to the public just yet, he decided instead to throw himself into work as a distraction.He could get his orders to the suppliers, plan for the next couple of months, and, finally, teach Tegan how to bake some things.She wanted to know this stuff, and if he was going to be a good boss, and a good member of this community, growing her skills and talent had to be part of that, right?He had to keep giving back; things couldn’t just go back to the way they were before the snow.Before Nash.
* * *
The fifth day, New Year’s Eve, starts with Shaz informing him that he is taking the afternoon off.
‘I’m busy,’ he mumbles, not looking up from the open spreadsheet on his laptop.He’d never normally work at the bakery counter like this but Tegan wanted another afternoon practising her breadmaking with his supervision, so he sits perched on a counter stool, hunched over his computer, trying to avoid the occasional plume of flour or splodge of dough.
‘It’s a national holiday, Christopher.’At this point, he assumes Shaz must have cut herself a key, by the ease with which she keeps appearing without anyone having to let her in.
‘Not for lots of businesses.Pubs do a roaring trade, I hear.’
‘Yes, and you’re abakery.What are you going to do?Offer buns at midnight?Hardly the same.’
‘You say that, but you’d be into it.’
‘I would.But also look at Teegs, she’s desperate for some time off.’
He raises his head finally.‘Are you, Tegan?’
She has finished kneading the loaves, which sit in their baskets proving on the counter, but she hesitates before answering.‘No.I mean, yes.I mean!This has been really nice today and thank you for teaching me all the new things, but I’d like to go to the ...thing later.’
Shaz shoots her a wide-eyed look, and groans exasperatedly.‘Tegan!’