He hands her the phone.
‘Oh shite.’
‘Indeed.I think they’re here too.’
‘Fuck,’ mutters Nash, his hands running through his hair.
‘Tegan!’Shaz barely raises her voice, but her tone is sharp.
It surprises him a bit that Tegan comes running so quickly, but when she does, her face is frantic.‘I’ve just looked at my phone!I’m so sorry, I didn’t realise what was happening and I had notifications turned off and my account is private so someonestolethe video from there and leaked it and—’
Nash sets his hands gently on her shoulders.‘Tegan, it’s not your fault.It was probably going to get out eventually that I was here.Someone was going to spot me, and if it wasn’t on TikTok it would have been on someone’s Facebook photos or something.It’s not like I laid down the law on privacy.’
‘I’m really sorry,’ she whispers, deep sobs punctuating her words.
‘Discussions on internet safety coming for you later.Right now, we possibly have a situation to be dealing with,’ Nash reassures her.
They poke their heads out through the kitchen door, only to see that the van isn’t just one van anymore.It’s a gaggle of photographers and reporters, and several more vans.
‘Christ, do they have nothing better to do?It’s literally Christmas Day!’Christopher hisses.
‘Like what?Report on the weather?Give over, this is the most exciting thing in celebrity news that’s happened round here since Will and Kate left Anglesey.’
In one horrifying singular motion that feels right out of a horror movie, the mob turns towards the café.
‘Hide the American!’Shaz yells, and Tegan yanks him as far back into the kitchen as possible without knocking anything over.
Christopher can just hear his muffled cries of, ‘I’mCanadian,’ before Nash disappears entirely from sight.
Making himself as tall and broad as possible, the latter rather difficult for him, Christopher takes up the full doorway to the kitchen like a guard, just as the front door bursts open.The reporters and photographers attempt to shuffle inside, clearly not expecting it to be quite so full in here.A photographer looks around the café with lens raised to eye just in case they can grab a candid photo.
The guests go deadly silent, eyes focussed on the intruders.
‘Can we help you?’asks Tamara, standing up from her seat and assuming her usual role of Being In Charge, hands on her hips.
One particularly smarmy-looking chap saunters forward with a grin like the cat who got the cream.‘We have it on good authority that actor Nash Nadeau is here...assisting the community, apparently.We would really like to just get a few words with him about what he’s doing here.’
‘You are interrupting a private event, and we are not speaking to the press at this time.Please vacate the premises immediately.’
‘And who are you to speak?His PR?’
‘Tamara Yang, I’m the local councillor.I’m in charge.’This yields a cheer ofyeahsfrom the townies.‘So now, you all must leave.’
‘And will you shut that bloody door?’cries Dai.‘Letting all the heat out, you are.’
‘He is here, though, isn’t he?’presses another photographer.
‘No, he’s not,’ says Priti, getting to her feet.
‘Why would an actor be here in our quaint little village?’sniffs Cecil.
‘We don’t even know who you mean!’yells Myffy extremely unconvincingly, but Christopher’s heart aches for the effort anyway.
The journalist looks not remotely amused by the solidarity on display.‘Funny you’d say that, because I’m pretty sure this is the same establishment as seen in this TikTok here.’The photographer next to him holds up their phone where Tegan’s TikTok is playing.‘So, unless he’s already left, which I sincerely doubt, I’m sure he’s here.’
‘Regularly watch videos of teenagers, do you?’Christopher snarls from the doorway into the kitchen, and one of the photographers chuckles before remembering they are essentially all here from the same tip-off.
‘We know he’s here,’ yells someone from the mob.
