‘For us, it’s kind of like a live magazine, so people can read what we’re up to.’
‘And all Haf’s work is about getting people to connect with nature, and it helps them with fundraising for conservation projects, like the Seeds for Bees fundraiser you did,’ adds Christopher, and Haf’s heart swells, because he’s been reading.
‘Oh, don’t mind him, Haf. He’s an absolute Luddite despite somehow running a successful business,’ Esther says.
‘Oh, I employ young people to do all that part for me. Maybe you can educate this old man, Haf?’ Otto laughs. ‘Is that your long-term career plan then?’
‘Oh, well... no. I’m not sure, really. I did ecology at uni, so that’s how I got into it, but it’s the people and wildlife bit I like.’
‘Must be hard to enjoy that part if you’re behind a desk all the time,’ Otto adds.
In flashes, Haf sees her sad little desk covered in papers, squeezed into a windowless corner in her sad little office surrounded by pictures of sad badgers and celebrities posing with dead fish.
Her throat tightens. She doesn’t want to go back there.
Christopher pats her on the arm.
‘It’s not what I want forever, no,’ she says, and then laughs awkwardly.
‘Oh,’ say both of Christopher’s parents.
An awkward pause hangs in the air.
‘If I can offer a little sage advice,’ snuffs Otto. ‘It’s sensible to not give up on a good job just because the grass could be greener on the other side.’
Haf doesn’t want to go into the specifics of how her job is draining the life out of her, so nods eagerly.
‘Sure, but if it’s making you miserable?’ adds Christopher.
‘It’s a job, Christopher. It’s not about happiness. It’s about what puts food on the table, and if the money is good, then you stick it out. That’s part of being an adult.’
Christopher winces. ‘Money isn’t everything, Dad,’ he says firmly.
‘Of course it is. Money is security, means you can buy the things you need, support your family,’ he says, gesturing around at their home with his whisky glass. Even though Otto says this with a laugh, there’s a seriousness underneath it all. This doesn’t sound like a conversation that’s been had just this once, either. ‘I think it matters quite a lot.’
Determined to defuse whatever is happening, Haf pipes up. ‘That’s true, Otto, but I work for a charity, so the money is very bad,’ she laughs.
This doesn’t solicit the laughter she was hoping for, and instead Esther produces another ‘Oh’.
Perhaps not the best thing to tell her rich fake boyfriend’s parents, even as a distraction.
There’s an awkward silence while everyone sips at their drinks, apart from Haf, who has not yet mustered the courage to pick up her mulled wine again, lest it bring on a coughing fit from sheer proximity.
I’ll take an awkward silence over arguing, she thinks.
To her relief, the front door slams, rattling the windows in their frames and distracting everyone from their sulk.
‘Oh, that’ll be Kit back with the dogs,’ says Otto.
Two scruffy terriers race into the living room, and head straight to Christopher, yapping and whining for attention. Their tails wag so hard with happiness that their little bodies turn comma shaped. Christopher clambers onto the floor to say hello, and they bounce around him, far too excited to be cuddled but still desperate to be touched.
Haf can kind of relate. Perhaps she’s a terrier after all.
‘All right, girls, calm down. I’m back,’ he says, laughing as one of them jumps up and licks his glasses off his head. ‘Come say hello, Haf.’
She joins him on the floor, cross-legged, and the dogs, who have almost entirely calmed down, realise someone new is here. They look at her with curiosity, tilting their heads as she says hello.
The slightly smaller one trots over and sniffs Haf’s outstretched hand for a few moments, before licking it with a tiny pink tongue.
