I close my eyes, swallowing against the lump in my throat. “You should have told me. Why didn’t you?”
He looks confused, “Tell you what, Charli? I’ve told you everything. Everything.”
“You didn’t tell me you have a child, Sawyer. A little girl. That changes things.”
He runs a hand down his face and takes a deep breath and exhales it slowly. “What are you talking about, Charli? What kid? I don’t have a kid.”
“Ava told me she was pregnant, and that’s why she left you at the airport… because she was scared. Now, she has this little girl who’s old enough now to ask questions about who her daddy is. She even showed me a picture and said you’ve been paying child support all these years.” I flop back on my mattress, leaning against the van wall. “Although that’s admirable, she needs a father… a family, to grow up with.”
My breath catches again, this time on a sob I didn’t expect. “I didn’t want to be the thing that complicated your life even more. I didn’t want to be the reason your daughter grows up confused. Or resents me.” Tears slip down my cheeks, hot and unwelcome. I don’t even try to hide them.
Sawyer stands there processing all I’ve told him. All his emotions cycle through on his face until he smiles. “I know how to fix this.” He holds up his phone.
“How? What’s there to fix? You have a kid, Sawyer. You need to go be a dad and I will not be the reason you don’t.”
“Just hold on a second.” I watch him scroll through his contacts and finally click the dial button and puts it on speakerphone.
“What the hell are you calling me in the middle of the night for, dude? Did my sister piss you off again? I should warn you,she’s been in rare form since seeing your picture all over the internet.” A female voice answers.
“Sorry for the late call, Jessica, but I need you to confirm something for me and I should warn you, I have you on speakerphone with my girl, Charli, listening.” Sawyer’s eyes never leave mine, like he’s measuring what I’m feeling.
“Um, okay. Hello. I’m Jessica and I’m assuming this does have something to do with my sister, Ava. What’s she done now?”
Sawyer smiles at me, “Can you tell me and Charli whether or not Ava has a child?”
The phone is quiet for a few seconds and then laughter bursts through the phone. “A child? Like a real, living person? Are you crazy? She couldn’t keep a goldfish alive, never mind a kid. What’s this all about, Sawyer?”
The sudden relief and at the same time overall guilt washes over me. He doesn’t have a kid. There’s no daughter involved. No family to reunite together. That bitch fucking lied to my face, played on my emotions, and convinced me to do the right thing… all so she could break us up.
She better hope I never see her face again. I won’t be responsible for my actions.
“Thank you for confirming, Jessica. I appreciate it, and I’m sorry to have woken you up so early.” Sawyer tells her.
“Let me just say to your friend, I love my sister because she’s my sister, but she’s got some serious screws loose and if she can manipulate you for her benefit… she won’t think twice about it. If you’re serious over Sawyer, then you are the luckiest person alive. He will love you with all his heart, body, and soul. Hold on to him with two hands.”
I look into Sawyer’s eyes with tears in mine. “I will. Thank you.” I say softly.
“Good night, Jessica.” Sawyer says and then hangs up.
I shake my head in total disbelief at how gullible I was to believe her. “She told me I was below your ‘station’. I can’t believe I listened to her. Let her dictate my actions and feelings.”
Sawyer steps forward again, his hands hovering at my arms but not touching yet—like he’s waiting for permission. “Can we just talk? Please.”
I look up at him, really look, and I see it. Everything I ever wanted to believe in someone. Loyalty. Love. A raw kind of fearlessness that says he’d chase me to the ends of the earth if it meant keeping us together.
Suddenly, Sawyer climbs into my van with Ghost right behind him. He closes the door and lays down on the mattress. Ghost curls up next to him.
“What are you doing?” I ask in confusion.
“My ‘station’… is wherever you are, Charli. I belong with you… and Ghost.”
I don’t answer right away. Why would he even want to deal with me and all my drama? I don’t know, but I’m not going to question it, either. Like Jessica said, I’m going to hold on to him with both hands.
We sit there in the stillness, side by side on the mattress in the back of a van that’s seen better days but somehow still feels like the safest place in the world tonight.
And when he finally speaks again, his voice is low and sure. “I don’t care what Ava said. I don’t care what lies she used to push you away. I care about you. And I’m not going anywhere. I love you, Charli.”
“I love you, too, Sawyer. Very much.”
