Chapter sixteen
Jimmy had set his alarmearly so he wouldn't miss Coop's live appearance. He'd sent an encouraging text before Coop was due to be on but hadn't dared call in case he interrupted important moments of preparation. He knew from Coop that these appearances involved makeup, going over questions beforehand so they'd know what they'd be asked, and a certain amount oftime waiting in the wings, which was especially not a good time for a phone call when he was doing an appearance with Lincoln. The guy didn't know Coop and Jimmy were dating, and they both wanted to keep it that way.
So he was trying not to interfere with these interviews. And that, from the first glimpse of Coop's face on the screen, suddenly felt like a mistake. With a sinking, hollow feelinginside him, Jimmy watched with increasing alarm as the awful interview unfolded.
Fortunately, they kept it short. The producers were trying to puff the show, not reveal hitherto-hidden cracks between the stars. But during the short time they were on the air (live, with thousands of people watching), Lincoln Canes rolled his eyes, clenched his hands into fists, and made a short, unfriendly remarkthat barely concealed his bitterness about Hayes' runaway popularity—and not his own character's. Coop's reactions were just as telling, and made Lincoln look even more like an asshole. He was jittery, trying to keep his right leg still during the interview, and he could barely bring himself to look at his costar. On top of that, he was unusually washed out, and didn't have his usual smileand cheerful charm in place. He seemed diminished, withdrawn, and unnerved. Maybe even scared. Was that a flinch, when Lincoln clenched his fists? No, surely not, but he eased even farther away from his costar as the interview wound to its horrible conclusion. There was a sense of uneasiness in the room that cheerful hosts with softball questions couldn't ameliorate. The puff interview finally,mercifully ended, after what felt like about two years but couldn't have been more than ten minutes by the clock.
Immediately, Jimmy called Coop. And kept calling as he got ready for work, slipping on his uniform, packing his lunch (and then taking out the bottle of detergent he'd accidentally packed and replacing it with a sports drink), and stopped trying only for his clenched-jaw drive into work. Throughout the day, he regularly tried to call or text his boyfriend, and he managed to leave a couple of messages that he hoped were encouraging, rather than raging against Lincoln.
It was a balancing act, for sure, since he didn't want to be a demanding boyfriend, but his gut told him Coop needed him.
Cooper texted him eventually, a message that was short and apologetic:I'mOK. No time to talk, sorry.Management's not happy, and we're hearing about it.
Around three in the afternoon, he called. He didn't sound okay, probably because he was trying way too hard to.
"No, no, it's fine. I'm—it's fine. We just got a talking-to, that's all. Have to try harder on air, especially when it's live! There were some choice words about our acting ability, ha-ha."
"Iwish they wouldn't lump you in with that guy. You didn't do anything."
"I know what you mean, but he's my costar, so I guess we go down together if one of us sinks the boat." The forced brightness in his voice was unnerving.
"It wasn't your fault, believe me. I hope he pulls his head out of his ass, but you're not responsible for him being a jerk. I hope you believe that, because it'strue."
"Sure. Thanks. Listen, I've got to—"
"Okay. I'll let you go. Please take care of yourself, Coop."I wish I was there to do it for you.
"Yeah. I—I hope I see you soon."
There was something wistful and final about that goodbye. It scared him. "You will. You'd better. Hey, if you need to dump everything and run, you come to me, okay? Even if we have to quit our jobs and gosomewhere else for a little privacy. We'll figure it out. I'll stand by you. I promise."
"Really? You mean you'd still like me if—" Coop broke off.
"If you weren't an actor? Of course." It was startling to even have that questioned. "Do you really think there are any conditions on my feelings for you? I promise you, there aren't. I don't seem to be able to compartmentalize that way.It's just you. So, whatever you need, let me know. We'll work towards it. Even if it's quitting the show."
"I don't know what to say." Coop sounded genuinely blown away. "I—" In the background, someone said something. Coop hurriedly finished. "Love you. Talk soon." Then he hung up.
