She met my gaze. After a beat, she glanced down. My current situation with Declan hit too close to home for her. I wanted to get up and hug her and thank her for not throwingme out last night. Growing up, Dad left his first wife and kids to be with my mom. We never got the whole story, but people in Bensonhurst kept the rumors going for years. By the time Louisa and I were in middle school, everyone knew we were related.
Now here I was, more or less, repeating my mother’s story. Declan had a chance to marry Harper and have the family he wanted. Sure, he had said he was afraid to be a father. But in the last few weeks, I could tell he had changed his mind about Joey. The desperate look in his eyes, the panic I saw there when Harper told him she wanted Joey back said it all. He wanted to make things work with Harper.
“I know what you’re thinking.” She reached out and squeezed my hand. “It’s not the same. Not even close.”
“He made his choice. I need to respect that.”
“Okay.” She put her muffin down and wiped her hands. “So let me see if I have this right. You agreed to help Declan with his brand-new baby. Then things escalated between you two…you had mind-blowing sex.”
I shifted my weight to check on the table behind us. Louisa didn’t have a filter.
“I can tell it was good. Look at you.” She pointed at my face. “Anyway, what happened after that? The mother of his child came back and now she thinks she has a claim on him? She’s been gone for how long? Not to mention that she didn’t tell him about the baby. It’s almost been a year. How are you the bad guy in this scenario?”
I opened my mouth to speak but she continued.
“And if you try to tell me that Dad left because of you. You know that that’s not true. Dad left becauseof Dad. End of story. It took me a while to see that, but now I know. Their choice has nothing to do with yours.”
I rubbed the side of my face. Her words made so much sense. I wish the story in my head felt the same. But whether my situation mirrored Mom’s or not, it didn’t matter. Declan had already made his choice.
“That’s the thing. I don’t get to choose. He’s already gone.”
“I don’t believe it.” She sat back, crossing her arms over her chest. “My gut tells me he’s not in love with her. Don’t give up. It isn’t over. I can see you’re afraid. Don’t be.”
“He practically proposed to her last night.” My eyes welled up with tears. Saying the words aloud cemented in my heart what my head already knew. Even if he loved me, he was really gone. “I need to move on.”
“This sucks.” She got up and hugged me. After a few seconds, she pulled back and picked up one of my curls. “We should dye our hair.”
I laughed, looking at her blue tresses. “I wish I could. But I have to find an apartment first. I can’t stay with you forever.”
“Fine.” She rolled her eyes. “Do you need me to go with you?”
“No. I’m good. I actually only have two places I want to look at before I make a decision.”
I had spent the last month looking for apartments for when my thirty days with Declan were over. When he asked me to be his girlfriend, I kind of forgot about all my research. Thank God I had been too busy all weekend to delete any of it.
“I knew I recognized you.” The woman behind metapped me on the shoulder. “I guess your plan to get pregnant to catch a billionaire didn’t work.”
The tabloids had said something to that effect in their story when they assumed I was Joey’s mom. I turned to face the woman to tell her it was rude to listen in on other people’s private conversations. But when I did, she had her phone up to show me a picture of Declan outside of Tiffany’s. He was trending again.
My hands turned cold. I didn’t care that I didn’t know the woman. I grabbed the phone and scrolled through to read the latest story. He was caught outside the famous jewelry store shopping for an engagement ring, which their source assured them wasn’t for Isla—the woman who allegedly had given birth to Declan’s ten-month-old son. The post went on and on about the details of the ring, then closed with a promise to provide more details on the identity of the woman who truly had Declan’s heart. He hadn’t wasted any time moving on.
“Let’s get out of here.” Louisa grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the door.
“I should stay off social media for a while,” I mumbled.
“Yeah, you should. Don’t pay attention to what they say. I’m sure Declan?—”
“Declan was there to buy a ring. Of course, he was. Of course, he’s marrying her. She’s the mother of his only child. I told you. I don’t get a choice in the matter.” I took a deep breath to stop the tears, but it didn’t help. I sobbed into my hands and let the realization wash over me like a bucket of cold water. “He’s moved on. I have to do the same.”
21
TALK TO HER
Declan
I glared at the three diamonds settings propped on my desk. After an hour of doing the same at the jewelry store, I had decided to bring my final choices back to the office and make a decision alone. Canceling all my morning meetings didn’t help, either. The rings were all wrong, even the delicate velvet boxes felt wrong. But in my gut, I knew marrying Harper was the right thing to do—not just for her, but for Joey as well.
Harper needed me. All night, I had dreams of her sitting alone on the bed crying because she was afraid she wouldn’t live long enough to see Joey grow up. Or that he would grow up not knowing who she was—just like I had done with my own dad. I didn’t want that for him.
