“Oh, Elias.”
“Emotionsarehard for me,” he continued, the words emerging rushed, like he had to get them out as quickly as he could before he shut down again. “I do exactly what you said at the cabin. I compartmentalize things and keep them locked away to protect myself from being hurt. It’s how I coped back then. How I survived. It’s how I cope now. That day when I came to your house, I wasn’t sure what I felt for you, but holding you— It hit me that if something happened to you, I-I couldn’t bear the thought of it.That’swhy I left the way I did and why I didn’t respond to your messages. That’s why I,” he sucked in a breath, “ran like a coward. I knew then I was already over my head because I felt too much for you.”
Her heart broke at the words, at the honesty and pain in his voice, in his gaze. She crossed her arms and noted the way his lashes dipped, his eyes lowering to her chest before flicking back up to her face. The heat in his look spoke volumes, and combined with his words, she felt his stare like a physical touch. “Why are you telling me this now?”
“Because as hard as it is to admit, Cole said something today that gutted me. Basically that all these years I’ve been dishonoring our parents by keeping everyone at arm’s length. I thought that doing so would protect me. But it hasn’t.”
“It hasn’t?”
“No. Because it didn’t protect me from you. From loving you.”
She felt dizzy from lack of air and vaguely wondered if she’d drank too much and fallen asleep waiting on Ana to find a dress. If this was all a dream. “How do I know you’re not going to say these things and then ghost me again? Disappear the next time I get a cold or, God forbid, something worse? Things happen, Elias. It’s just…life.”
She watched as his handsome face tightened at her words, but she couldn’t help it. She had a right to her questions, to her doubts and the insecurities he’d caused with his behavior. A right to know if he planned tostick.There was a reason hospitals warned women facing hard diagnoses that eighty percent of men leave. And if Elias was going to be a runner? She’d rather be alone. No matter how much it hurt. Better to know now and cut her losses before discovering it too late.
“You don’t. I know I have to rebuild your trust in me, but I will. I know you probably won’t believe me until the time comes when it’s put to the test and I prove it to you, Quinley, but I won’t leave. Not again.”
Stunned silence filled the interior of the limo, and she vaguely realized they’d started moving. Cole driving them home, no doubt.
Elias ran a hand over his face and head, and she watched, taking in the tension, the sense of…needto convince her.
“You have every reason to doubt me, but I mean it when I say I’m tired of running, of hiding. Pretending. I want you, Quinley. I want to be with you, to get to know all there is to know about you, to be the man I know I can be with you.Foryou. I might have to walk over glass to convince you, but trust me when I say I am more afraid of living my life as a shell and losing out on the love I feel for you than I am of the past.”
Tears flooded her eyes at his words, at their sincerity and depth. But that feeling of waking up alone and being left with no responses still stung. “I…suppose I can forgive you. Once. But I won’t be my mother. I won’t put up with you withdrawing and going no contact or becoming emotionally abusive when you get scared of your big-boy feelings.”
“I understand.”
He canted his head in a nod. Then he took a breath as though it was his first and gave her a slow smile that melted her insides. Like he was so confident and sure in himself and the feelings he’d just confessed that he didn’t deem her conditions to be a problem.
Elias moved quickly, switching seats until he sat beside her on the larger one. Before she had time to blink, he tugged her onto his lap.
“We can go slow. And while we get to know one another better, maybe I can do something to apologize again and make it up to you.”
“How so?”
“Well, I can’t in good conscience give you chips.”
A laugh left her at his too-serious tone whereas hers sounded breathless and needy. “Overlord,” she muttered, shaking her head as she curled an arm atop his shoulder. “Fine. I’ll get my own chips. Whatcanyou give me?”
His gaze softened, revealing every insecurity and vulnerability he seemingly possessed. Her heart squeezed at the sight, taken aback by all the ways Elias was allowing herin.
“Me, all of me, no holding back, no…avoiding my ‘big-boy feelings,’” he murmured. “Not anymore. Not if you’ll give me a chance.”
She ran her fingertips through his hair, wondering if she’d ever be able to breathe properly again. “I can handle that.”
The arm supporting her back shifted, his hand sliding into her hair where his fingers tangled and gripped with just the right amount of force. He tugged, earning a gasp that parted her lips just in time for his kiss. Thefirstkiss he had ever claimed on his own.
And she let him. She let him kiss her again and then again, her arms locked around Elias as he revealed the man he’d held back, the one she’d seen lurking under the surface from the day she’d jumped into the limo as a runaway bride.
This man?
This was a man she could love forever.
Epilogue
September…
Soft guitar strumming and a man’s low sound check filled the area as Elias walked through Haven, the newest restaurant in Carolina Cove.
