Kane is thoughtful, sipping his coffee. “So. Bite the bullet and confront your folks first? Or hit Sin and confront them later, after you’re settled into my place?”
I set my coffee down. “I think it will be best to see them first. I must get it over with. Already, I am filled with anxiety.”
He nods, lacing our fingers together. “No matter what, honey, I’ve got you. Okay? I’m with you, no matter what.”
I nod, smile at him, even though my nerves make me feel not very much like smiling. “I know. It is why I will have the courage to face them.”
He shakes his head. “Nah. You don’t need me.”
I swallow hard. “I do, though. I have nowhere to go. So, yes, I do need you.”
He smiles gently, shaking his head again. “Not what I meant. I meant, everything you need to be the woman you want to be, you already have inside you. You have the courage to face your parents. You have what it takes to figure out who you want to be, what your purpose is. You don’t need me for that. It’s already there inside you.”
My eyes water. “Do you truly believe that?”
He nods. “Down to my bones, beautiful.”
I look away, gathering myself. Our food arrives and we eat.
“Kane?” I ask, between bites of omelet. He gives me his eyes. “I will not be a burden to you, or your friends. I must find a way to contribute.”
He sets his fork down. “There’s no burden.”
I can only stare at my food, barely able to taste it. “I was given everything. I did nothing to earn it. I have never worked. I have never swept a floor or made a bed. I have no skills. What will I do? How can I live with you and your friends and not be a burden, not be doing the same thing I have always done, only with new people, if I have no skills?”
He sighs, thoughtfully rather than with irritation. “You’ll find something. We’ll all help you.”
I am still stuck on it, searching myself and my memory and my life for anything even remotely useful. “I can cook.”
He looks at me. “You can? You grew up with a personal chef, I thought.”
I shrug. “I was a very bored child. Very often, I would bother her as she cooked, asking her a million questions. In order to get things done, she taught me what to do simply to make use of my boredom. It was harmless, in Pappa’s eyes, so he allowed it. If you like Indian food, I can cook.”
He touches my cheek. “Honey, don’t worry about it. Lots of people who grew up totally normal find themselves in your same situation, trying to figure out what their purpose is. Shit, at least half of the people who join the military do it for that exact reason—they don’t know what else to do with themselves.”
I frown. “Really?”
He nods. “Finding a purpose is…it’s just life. Some people are lucky, they just know it from day one. Like Luke—there was never a doubt in his mind what his life was about. He was raised a rancher, a horseman. But my buddy from the teams, Malone…he, uh, that was why he joined the Army. He was the youngest of four kids, from a good solid home. Two parents who loved each other and all of them. His oldest brother is a cop, his sister got married young and is a wife and mom, his next oldest brother is a mechanic. But Malone…he didn’t have a clue. Wasn’t particularly academic, didn’t excel in sports, wasn’t drawn to cars, no desire to be a cop or fireman or whatever. Had no clue what to do with his fuckin’ life, so he joined the Army. Made friends with a Ranger while he was on shore leave, and his bud convinced him to try and join the Rangers. Made it and found his purpose.” He’s choked up, blinking hard. “Kid was a hell of a warrior.”
I touch his hand. “Kane, my darling…”
He shakes his head slowly, the sorrow dissipating. “It’s okay. I’m okay.” He smiles, shaking his head again, more quickly. “Point is, you’ll figure it out. Don’t need to freak out about it.”
I try a smile. “I just…my lifemustbe different. Iwill notbe indebted to people who are providing everything for me.”
“I get it, babe. I really do. And I promise, we’ll help you find a way. Maybe working for Sin in some capacity, or maybe just some other job. I don’t know right now, but I know we’ll figure it out. You’re smart, and you have the desire. That’s what’s important—the rest is just details.”
We finish our meal and he pays, and we head out to his bike. “So. You know where your folks are staying?”
I shake my head. “No, I do not. I was flown by helicopter from the airport. And then when I left, I was not paying attention, only trying to escape and not wreck Pappa’s giant stupid automobile.”
He muses. “All right.” He digs his cell phone out of his saddlebags, dials a number, puts it to his ear. “Yeah, hey Inez, it’s Kane…yeah, I’m in Vegas, I just got one thing to wrap up and then I’m back. Yeah, listen, I really appreciate the time off—god, Chance and his big fuckin’ mouth. Yes, Inez, I’m bringing someone with me. Her name is Anjalee Sharma. And actually, reason I’m calling is I need your help finding her father. He’s in Vegas somewhere. Rohit Sharma. Yeah. No, it’s cool, no backup needed. We just want to go talk to him, but she…well, it doesn’t matter. I can explain when we get back to Sin. I just need to know where he is. Yeah, cool, just text me the address. Cool. Thanks, Inez, you’re the best.” He ends the call and pockets the phone. “Inez is on it,” he says to me.
“Who is this Inez, please?”
“My boss, sort of. Well, no sort of about it. Sheismy boss. You’ll meet her later.” His phone dings, and he looks at it. “Damn, that was fast. Okay, here we go. Not far from here, actually.”
We climb onto his bike and head away—my heart hammering.
