She looks at me with apprehension in her eyes. "I, um...” She covers her face. Blows out a shaky breath. "How would you feel if I said I want to go off birth control and…um…see what—what happens?"
The breath whooshes out of my lungs. I slip my hand out of my pocket, keeping the box hidden in my fist.
It's my turn to go shaky and clammy-handed, breath hot and lumpy in my throat. I know she's waiting for my response, her beautiful green eyes frantically hunting my face for signs of my reactions.
"Bear?" It's a tiny whisper.
“I guess I'd just have one question to ask you.”
She licks her lips, tears shining in her eyes. "Okay?"
I slip off the bench and onto one knee in front of her, the hot lump in my throat bobbing as I attempt to swallow past it.
I open and hold up the ring box. "Noelle, will you marry me?" A thousand other thoughts and questions rampage through my brain—excuses, declarations, pleas. None of it will come outproperly. "I…I've planned this a hundred different ways, and thought about what to say a million times. I love you so fucking much, and I just…I love you. I want to be with you forever. Please, Noelle. Marry me?"
Her hands clap together over her mouth the moment I go to one knee, tears spurting down her cheeks as I show her the ring. By the time I've gotten the last syllable out, she's sobbing and nodding.
"Yes?" I ask.
She leaps off the bench and slams into me full force, knocking me backward to the grass on my back, her arms around my neck.
"YES!" She shrieks, breathless and laughing and sobbing at once. "Yes, yes, yes—god yes.Fuckyes."
I stand up, and she comes with me, leaping up into my arms, legs going around my waist. "Fuck yes?" I repeat, laughing.
"How many different ways can I say it?” She says, peppering my face with kisses. "Yes. Yes, please. Yes forever. A thousand times, yes. Fuck yes.” She palms my face and kisses my mouth until my cock goes hard in my jeans. “Yes, Bear Olafsson. I will absolutely, one hundred percent marry you. Do you have a pastor in your pocket? I'll marry you right now."
"Maybe you should at least try the ring on?" I ask, laughing.
She leans back, blindly trusting me to support her weight one-armed as she takes the ring from the box and slides it on her ring finger. I shove the empty box in my pocket and cradle her backside as she clings to my waist with her thighs, her left hand on my chest, the sunset glittering scarlet-orange fire off the diamond.
She's crying as she stares at it. "God, Bear, it's incredible."
"Remember when Tommy and Colin took you to Charlevoix for brunch?" I ask; she nods, frowning. "Raina, Ashlynn, and Kyle took me ring shopping and helped me pick it out."
It's a diamond solitaire, a full carat, round, with a white gold band that splits into two narrower bands that cross to become an infinity loop.
"It’s so beautiful. I love it so much." She rests her hands on my shoulders. "But…you didn't answer my question."
I lean in and kiss her. "I figure you'd want to process my question first. But the short answer, my love, isyes. Whatever the timing is, yes. You wanna start now? I'm in. You wanna wait till we're married? Let's plan the wedding."
She sniffles, twisting and holding her hand at a different angle so the sunset catches the ring. "To be honest, I don't want to wait. I love you. I love our life. And…I've wanted to be a mother…" She drops he head, sniffling again. "For a long time. A very, very long time. And now that we have things sort of figured out more—you working with Felix and me opening my salon, I don't see a reason to wait. I just…I…we never talked about how you feel about kids."
I sit on the bench, and she shifts to straddle me, shins folded under her thighs. “Noelle, I…” I shake my head. “I haven’t really thought about it. I honestly never expected…any of this. To fall in love. To have a career I’m passionate about. A life—areallife. I didn’t have parents. So, I guess If I’m being honest, it’s a scary prospect. I don’t know the first thing about being a dad. But I know as long as I’ve got you, I can figure it out. You just may have to show me the way."
She cups my face, strokes my beard. "Bear, my sweet love. You will be the best father. There is no doubt in my mind at all—you havesomuch love. Such a big heart. You may not have had a father, but that just means you get to be the father you wish you had."
My eyes sting. "What if I mess up?"
She laughs. "You're going to. So will I. We're going to fight. I'll probably make you sleep on the couch at least once and you'll want to yeet me into the bay at least once.”
I snort. "Yeet?"
She rolls her eyes. “Yeah, not sure where that came from." She kisses me. "Are you saying you're ready to…not try, but not stop it from happening?"
I nod. "That's what I'm saying. I love you. I want this life with you. All of it. I want to be your husband. I want to watch you have our baby. All of it. Even if I'm scared. I love you so fucking much, and I'm ready for all of it."
She leans in and nips my lower lip in her teeth. "Then take me home and see if you can put a baby in me on the first try."
