I don’t dare look away, cannot. He’s still deep inside me, my sex spasming, wracking my body with shuddering aftershocks.
He cups my face, kisses my lips, tasting my tears. “Naomi, I love you.”
A sob rips out of me, and I bury my face in the side of his throat, feeling his wild pulse goingticktick-ticktickagainst my nose and lips. I shake, shudder—with aftershocks of climax and with sobs of emotion so complex there is no language to contain or express it all.
“I love you, Silas,” I whisper, my lips on his throat. I lift my head and let my tears fall, and show him my soul through our joined gazes. “I love you. I love you.”
His thumbs smear my tears away. I see in his eyes how overwhelmed he is—it’s written on his face. He swallows hard several times. When he speaks, it’s a faint whisper, with a tenderness and vulnerability I truly believe no one but me has ever or will ever see from him.
“I didn’t know.” He bumps his forehead against mine, taking a deep, shuddering breath. “I didn’t know.”
I wrap my arms around his neck and nestle my cheek in the soft nook where arm, shoulder, and chest meet. “Didn’t know what?”
“That it could be like this.” One of his hands clasps the back of my head, fingers gently massaging; his other hand cups my bottom in a possessive caress.
“I didn’t either,” I whisper.
“How can I love you so quickly yet so completely?”
I shake my head. “I don’t know.”
“We didn’t use protection,” he says.
My throat closes. “I…I’m barren,” I say, my voice not even a whisper.
“Barren?”
“I can’t conceive.”
“Naomi, I…” He hesitates, tilting his head to the side so he can meet my eyes. “I just…I still should have thought about it.”
I kiss his chin. “It’s okay, Silas. This is how it was meant to be.”
“What about…” He trails off, and starts again. “I’m clean.” I hear a question in his voice, unspoken.
“Clean?” I ask. “What do you mean?”
“STDs,” he answers. “I haven’t had any other partners in quite a while, and I always used protection, plus we get tested regularly. So do they, for that matter.”
“I’m not following, Silas.” I sigh. “You have to remember, I was raised in almost total isolation. I wasn’t taught the same things you grew up knowing.”
“Condoms don’t just protect against pregnancy, Naomi. There are also sexually transmitted diseases.”
“Oh.” A dozen questions bubble up.
“You can ask me anything, and I’ll answer honestly. You may not like some of the answers, but they’ll be the truth.”
I think through my questions. “Are you worried I have one, or you?”
“I know I don’t.”
“How?”
He blows a breath between his teeth. “Because the only partners I’ve had since joining the Arrows and living at Club Sin have been the girls who work in Hel, and they’re professionals. Protection is mandatory, as is quarterly testing.”
“Hel?”
A long pause. “The club is called Sin. For obvious reasons.”
