“Well, that’s not wrong. But it’s not even close to the whole story.”
“You eloped?”
I sip beer, and lean back, wiping my fingers on a napkin. “I honestly don’t even know where to start.”
Dinah frowns at me. She hears the complex layers of emotions in my voice—no one knows me as well as she does. I intentionally avoided discussing any of this with her because if anyone could have talked me out of doing what I did, it was her and I wasn’t about to allow that. This is the right thing for me, and I know it. She wants what’s best for me, but she’s also really protective and can be rather…aggressive about it, if she thinks I’m doing something stupid.
We have a complicated relationship, to say the least.
“Wes, talk to me.” She eyes me. “You’re worrying me. What did you do?”
So, I tell her the story. The TikTok, how it affected me. The spur of the moment decision to go meet her. How I felt when I met her, and how every moment since with her has only taken my feelings for her deeper and deeper. And oh yeah, she’s dying of leukemia as we speak.
When I’m done relating the events of the past week and a half—which is weird to think about, that it’s only been ten days since I first saw her video; it feels like a lifetime has passed—Dinah is quiet for a very long time.
“Wow.” She hands me her beer to set down. “That’s…a lot.”
“Yeah.”
Her eyes to my bedroom door, closed. “She’s in there, right now, sleeping?”
“Yeah.”
“And you’re determined to see this through?” Her gaze is unrelenting, assessing, seeing through me as no one else can.
I nod. “I am. All the way.”
“Why, Wes?”
I shrug. “I…I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked myself that. I don’t know, Di. Something about her just…belongs with me.Tome. I don’t know to even put it. I wouldn’t have picked this situation for myself, Dinah. Who would? It’s so crazy. Zero to…I’d say sixty, but that’s not it. It’s gone from zero to a thousand, like, instantly. My emotions, our relationship, her emotions, the reality of…the situation.”
“Wes, it’s bonkers. You literallyjustmet this girl and you’re acting like…like you’re married, like she’s the love of your life. I’m not questioning how you feel in this moment, Wes, I’m not, but—”
“You are. And that’s okay. I get it. Shit,Iquestion it myself, Dinah.”
Her gaze is speculative. “Sorry, but I have to ask. She’s not, like, milking this for money or attention, is she?”
“No. I don’t blame you for asking, but it’s not that. We’re doing our best to keep this out of the spotlight. I’m sure it’ll get out eventually and I’ll have to put out a statement, but I’m not thinking about that until I have to.”
She nods. “So, then, next thing to eliminate. Is it just the sex? I mean, I know you said she’s sick, but…I mean—can she? Have sex? I don’t know anything about her medical situation, obviously. But I imagine that’s got to be an element.”
“I’m not confusing physical chemistry for emotional connection, no.” I shrug. “That’s about all I’m willing to say, as I’m not sure what Jolene would be comfortable with me telling you.”
“I understand. But you’re sure, though, right? Because that can be really hard to differentiate.” She wiggles her fingers at her beer, and I hand it to her. “Thanks. I’ve been down that road, myself. Me and Gray. God, it was hot between us. And I thought it was love. I really did. And I think he did, too. But then I went through a really intense creation phase, and he couldn’t handle that part of me. And I realized it was just the sex.”
I frown. “It’s not that, Di. I promise.”
She smirks at me. “You didn’t know I can have sex, did you?”
“Dinah, god, come on.”
She wiggles her eyebrows at me. “I got lucky. The nerves that got damaged took out my legs, but not the sensation in my hoo-ha. So yeah, bro, I’m a fully functioning woman, in that respect. It was weird for Gray, at first, but he figured it out pretty fast.”
I grimace. “I don’t need to know about your sex life, Di, Ireallydon’t. Although I am glad for you, that you still have that.”
She shrugged. “Oh, I’d have it, one way or another. If I couldn’t use my lady bits for sexy times, I’d have figured out something else.” A grin. “Iamgood with my hands, after all.”
I fake a gag. “Di, stop. Seriously.”
