“Alaska, now, huh?” He stood with his fists in his pockets, gazing steadily at me, his expression carefully blank.
“Crow, I…”
He held up a hand. “Don’t explain. I don’t need it. I get it.”
“You’re amazing.” I swallowed. “What we did was…amazing.”
“Takes more than that though.” He sighed. “I know it. I knew it, all along. I’m grateful for getting to spend time with you. It was my honor and my privilege.”
My eyes stung. “Crow, dammit.”
“Just sayin’ the truth.”
“I like you. I just—”
He touched my lips with one finger. “I said don’t, Charlie. I don’t need an explanation.” He opened my car door, ushered me in. “Drive till you get tired. Get a hotel, sleep until you wake up. Don’t think about me. Don’t miss me. You’re probably makin’ the right decision. I ain’t right for a woman like you.” He closed my door, and I lowered the window, he leaned in. “But I can sure as fuck appreciate my privilege at getting what I got with you. I won’t forget it.”
I swallowed. I couldn’t get past his violent past at this moment, but…I also couldn’t help wondering if maybe Iwasmaking a mistake. “Goodbye, Crow.”
He waved. “Bye, Charlie-girl.”
I drove away, and I didn’t look in the rearview mirror. Not even when I felt tears on my lip.
I was making the right choice. There was no future here.
There just wasn’t.
There couldn’t be.
Could there?
12
Crow
Watching that woman drive away ripped my heart out.
Wasn’t much point in telling her I’d fallen in love with her. Wouldn’t be fair to tie a woman like Charlotte Goode to the kind of life I could give her.
When had I fallen in love with her? Somewhere in between her kicking Yak in the nuts and feeling her come all over my cock in that nasty-ass bathroom.
I’d wanted better for her, but she’d taken to the experience with…gusto. I mean, god, the woman was a tiger, once she got going. I still had her claw marks on me, and bite-shaped bruises on my arms. I relished each one.
I missed the shit out of her.
The Denver show was a success. So were the back-to-back shows in the Twin Cities. Lexie and Myles were inseparable…and trouble. Wherever the crew was, partying, there they were. Laughing, drinking, the life of every moment. I envied them. They made it look so easy.
Shit, though, I knew there were things he wasn’t telling her. He wasn’t without his own demons he wrestled with in the small hours. Clearly neither was she. But that was their gig, not mine. I tuned and cared for the guitars, drank way too much whiskey, and played my guitar. I missed Charlie, but refused to call her—yeah, I had her number, and I’d programmed mine into her phone. Not that I was expecting a call.
Denver, Minneapolis-St. Paul, Milwaukee, Salt Lake City, Vegas, Albuquerque, Tucson…the shows went on, and the more time Myles spent with Lex, the more explosive his sets became. The woman had lit something inside him, I had to admit. I heard them playing together in his room, her on that little ukulele, singing in a voice that wasn’t technically pure or sweet, but was somehow mesmerizing in a husky, Adele sort of way. She was good, and her dad had been an idiot, God rest him.
Days, a week. Two weeks.
Three.
A month after Charlie left the tour hit El Paso, and then shit went sideways.
Tran showed up at the show.
