“And my father, as I’m sure you know.” She licked her lips, and then in the glittering torchlight, he could see one straight tear slipping down her cheek.
No longer was logic ruling his mind, and Nathaniel reached out quickly, brushing a thumb to push it away, his palm cradling the soft skin of her cheek.
Lady Jane gasped again. Her pink lips parted, and it drew his gaze down to them. For a few moments, Nathaniel was entirely lost in the world of Lady Jane. In that world, he had no family to protect, no fortune to return to his family’s coffers. There were no burdens on his shoulders. There was just this beautiful woman, her eyes searching his, her mouth looking far too inviting, and her soft skin under his fingertips.
He could kiss her, drown himself in the spell she was surely casting upon him and taste her lovely pink lips against his own. It would feel like relief sweeping down through him and over his soul if she allowed him such a privilege. He nearly leaned down, to press his lips against hers when he felt the gentle push of her hand against her chest. She backed away, her eyes wider than before, and his hand slipped from her cheek.
“Forgive me, my lord. I must go. I—” she shook her head, backing away, step by step, before she turned around and nearly raced through the open balcony doors.
Nathaniel cursed under his breath when she left, wondering why he'd had to scare her away by his near kiss. He turned back to look out over the dark gardens, and he rubbed a hand over his face. It had been a blissful thing for a few seconds at least, to forget all that weighed upon him. But as soon as she left, breaking the spell between them, it all came crashing down around him again.
He needed a wife and soon. But it would not be such a terrible fate if he could somehow find a way to tie himself to the lovely Lady Jane Caldwell.
I shall simply have to ask her to dance. We should at least dance before any kissing can occur.
With another spark of hope inside him, Nathaniel left the balcony smiling.
Chapter 6
Jane practically stumbled back into the ballroom. Her dance card hung from her wrist by a string, and she knew there were a few names on the later dances, but she was glad for the break just then. She simply had to lean against the wall and hope no one noticed her trying to catch her breath.
Looking into that man’s eyes when she’d met him at the doorway was one thing. That had made her feel weak and warm, like she was sinking with relief into a hot bath at the end of the day. But having him touch her was another story entirely. It felt like her skin was on fire, all her senses reacting to him.
It was just like the dreams she’d have, but only this time, there was a face to the man, and he had actually touched her. For a few seconds, she’d been lost entirely, unsure of where she was or what she was doing. It had felt glorious, almost like she was bathing in a sea of stars.
But soon, she’d faced cold, hard reality. If they’d been caught, she would have been forced to marry him, and that she could not have. She might have needed to marry in order to get the whole of her inheritance and all the properties, but she wanted the choice to be her own. For a moment, she considered that Lord Balwood had done it on purpose. But then she pushed that thought away.
No, he had been sincere. One can always tell by the eyes. And I think, perhaps, he might have been trying to kiss me.
She'd seen the slight lean and the gaze toward her mouth before good sense had taken hold, and she’d rushed away to escape him. Pushing further into the crowd, she found another glass of champagne and she took a large gulp of it, hoping it would somehow calm her.
I’m ill. That must be it. For why else could I be feeling in such a way? Like I have no control over my limbs or my heart? I’ve met handsome men before and not reacted in such a mad fashion. This must be some kind of fever.
Her eyes trailed over the crowd as she tried to distract herself for a few minutes. She spotted the young woman whose ball it was. Throughout the evening, she had been surrounded by young suitors. As lovely as she was, it was no surprise. Jane had been busy enough herself, but Lady Emily had been hard not to see.
And in that moment, Jane was watching as a young man approached her. He had kind eyes, and he was smiling. As they spoke. Jane could tell they knew each other. The man held out a hand to her, and Lady Emily nodded with enthusiasm as well as a blush.
He swept her onto the dance floor for the next set, and Jane smiled after them. They made it look so simple, with their easy smiles and comfortable looks.
She doesn’t look weak at the knees or as if she can’t breathe when that young man is around. I couldn’t possibly have a marriage where I lose all sense and balance.
As if hearing her inner trouble, Lord Balwood appeared again at her side, and she gasped once more, clamping a hand over her mouth to keep anyone else from hearing it. He wasn’t looking at her, but she could tell he was trying not to laugh.
Why must I keep gasping whenever he is near?
“I wanted to let you know, Lady Jane, that I had planned to ask before you rushed away if you might dance with me.” His eyes turned towards her dance card at her wrist. “Unless, of course, you have already been claimed for this dance.”
“No,” she said quickly. “I do not have anyone for this waltz.”
“Excellent,” he said, his eyes flashing, his hand holding out to her.
She took it, grateful for the gloves or else she would have to feel her skin against her own, and she wasn’t sure after the evening she’d had, if she would have been able to bear it. Jane tried to force herself to remain steady on her feet. Thankfully, Lord Balwood held her snuggly, his hand spread on her lower back, his other hand holding hers. Their eyes met as the dance began.
“I wanted to ask your forgiveness, Lady Jane,” he said. “I did not mean to make you uncomfortable in any way.
Her cheeks colored, and she shook her head, giving him a small smile. “No, of course not. I understand. Apology accepted.” His smile in response made her heart light.
They passed by Lady Emily, and the gentleman, and she was glad for the distraction.
