There was a soft knock at the door. Jane was not yet ready for visitors, but she called out anyway, allowing the person to enter. Perhaps a visitor could keep her from her own thoughts for a time.
“It's your cousin, my lady. He's wondering if you would see him,” Elaine said, her eyes both kind and pitying.
Knowing Edward was just outside and waiting, Jane refrained from a sigh. “Yes, you can send him in, Elaine.”
Elaine nodded, opened the door wide, and Edward walked in, his hands clasped, a frustrating look of concern on his face. He had been far too solicitous last evening. He was her cousin, of course, but there was something strange about the way he cared so much about her welfare. They had only just met, and he pretended as if they’d known one another for years.
He had even stayed overnight, and now he was there, seeing her in bed, looking rumpled and in pain. She could tell that he did not like Nathaniel, and she also knew that the news about Nathaniel's true self seemed to give him no end of pleasure.
“Jane,” he said, pulling a chair up next to her bed and sitting down without her invitation. “How are you this morning? I found I could barely sleep for worry of you.”
She gave him a weak smile, and she allowed him to take her hand and lay a kiss upon it. “I am very well. Thank you. My head hurts, but the doctor has left medicine for me. Thank you for what you did, Edward, carrying me out of the ball.”
She was very glad she had been unconscious for that part so that she would not have seen the utter looks of horror from everyone in the ton. It would have been expressions of horror mixed with enjoyment at the entertainment.
“Of course. I would do anything for you, dear Jane.” He kissed her hand again, and feeling slightly unsettled, Jane pulled away from him and tucked both her hands under the covers, folding them over her belly.
“I wasn't sure, but I wondered if you had seen the scandal sheets this morning.”
A lump of dread filled her stomach, and she shook her head. “No, I dare say I do not want to look at them.”
He gave her a little smile, but he dug in his waistcoat pocket to remove an article. “I can understand that entirely, and you do not have to read it. I simply thought you should know what it said.”
She closed her eyes, wondering if she could shut out the world for a little while. “What does it say?” she asked.
“I will not read you the full article, but unfortunately, they are relentless. It seems they keep discussing Lord Balwood and Lady Delilah’s little tête-à-tête just outside Lady Danver’s ball on the balcony.
As you noticed last evening, almost every important society gossip was there to see it, so it is no surprise that there was made mention of it in the scandal sheets this morning. Your name was subtly hinted at again. This time implying that you were there to try to break up the lover’s reunion because of jealousy or some such nonsense.”
Jane wanted to cry. Life used to be so simple. She drew, and she read. She looked at the stars, and she tried to learn as much as possible about them. She planned her travels and her future life. But now she had been tricked and hurt and on top of that, she was possibly with child.
“I see,” she said, her hopes slowly dying at ever having the future she had so dreamed for herself.
She knew what all this meant. It was still good that no news had come out of her and Nathaniel's time together, but still. Her name twice in the scandal sheets and in correlation with the same man? It did not look good at all. She was sure that onceshe went down to breakfast, her aunt would mention it, and she wondered if her season would be coming to an abrupt end.
To her surprise, Edward reached over and took out her hand from under the covers, bringing it closer to him. “My dear, I came to you this morning with a dual purpose. I wanted to see if you were well, of course, but I wondered something.”
He was looking down at her hand, and Jane felt a little horror growing inside her. His tone was different; his demeanor was different, and she wished she was not trapped in bed, having to listen to what he was about to say. For she knew just what it was, and it made her heart ache even more than it already was.
“I know this isn't what you had planned for your life. But even in our short time together, I have come to hold you in much affection. I wonder if you would do me the very great honor of becoming my wife. I can offer you protection and stability through all of this and it will blow over, especially with a husband at your side. And then, there will be no hindrance to you getting the inheritance your father so wanted for you.”
Jane looked at him, then he lifted his gaze to stare right back at her, waiting. His thumb rubbed along the back of her hand affectionately. She opened her mouth and took in a breath, ready to reject him. She never wished to marry someone she did not love, and now that she had known love, she knew exactly what she would be missing out on.
But that cannot be love, Jane. The man was only using you. What do you know of love?
She paused. She knew little, but this seemed strange. He acted as though it was kindness, but did he not understand the torture she was going through? The words in the scandal sheets could ruin her entirely. After this, she had no idea what would occur.
The inheritance could be lost, and someone else could come and take it all. Any hope of that adventurous future would be lost as well. She glanced at Edward. He was watching her eagerly, and yet she was curious why.
They had not known one another for long, nor did she feel any sort of pull towards him. They didn’t spend much time together, but he always seemed eager for her presence. When they were together, he spoke mostly. From the beginning, he had seemed to pretend an intimacy between them that they did not have. The proposal was soon, far too soon.
But instead of rejecting him outright, she said, “Edward, you are very kind to make such an offer. It shows your selflessness.”
It was a little kind, even if he was beginning to bother her, and even if everything was turning topsy-turvy. In the chaos, though, this proposal felt like a lifeline in some ways. She wondered if she should reach out and grasp it, save herself. If she was withchild, then she would have a husband, and that could all be explained away.
And yet, something niggled at her. A little trickle of suspicion mixed with her own feelings about him from the beginning, as well as her aunt’s warning to be a little wary of him.
Why is he doing this in truth?
