Suddenly, his expression turns. The amusement in his eyes vanishes, replaced by something cold. The air becomes thick then seems to disappear altogether. He leans forward, both of his hands are now planted flat on the desk, yet somehow his knuckles are white from pressure. “You underestimate the gravity of your situation.” His voice is laced with venom. “Defiance here isn’t just unwelcome. It. Is. Dangerous,” he spits each word at me.
I feel the tension radiating from him; it’s suffocating. I can see the anger in him that he’s barely capable of holding back. The room seems to shrink around us.
A loud knock on the door suddenly breaks the silence, splintering the tension, but I still don’t pull my eyes away, defiance still burns in my chest.
“Next week.” His voice is now sharp. “Same time.” Then just like that, I’m dismissed.
It takes everything in me not to react, not to bite back. So instead, I let it sink into me. Fueling the slow and deliberate way I stand up. My palms push against the couch, my fingers curling into the fabric of the cushion before I let go. I don’t give him another glance and turn to walk away.
Another knock echoes through the room, this one louder, more insistent, landing when I reach the door. I twist the handle pulling it open and—“Zedediah?” I stumble, tripping over my words. I stare into his eyes. His hand is still raised from banging on the door, but he slightly lowers it. His expression shifts as hiseyes trail over my body. I watch as his chest stops rising; I swear he’s stopped breathing.
Warmth blooms across my cheeks, and I feel like I’m sitting directly in front of the fireplace. It feels like I’ve been caught doing something I shouldn’t. My thoughts become tangled, and I remember the way he shoved his body into mine yesterday. He leans down, whispering, so only I can hear his voice, “Doesn’t take much to make you blush, huh?” I squeeze my thighs together, the reaction is automatic as the heat from my face quickly makes its way to my stomach. I break away, forcing my eyes down, focusing on the faint scuff marks on the floor. I push past him, my steps picking up speed.
But, I’m unable to outrun the feeling of his gaze on my back. It’s hot and heavy, like he knows exactly what it’s doing to me.
Chapter Six
Zedediah
Everything inside me stills when the door to his office opens. Why does Catarina look shaken? My mind races to fill in the blanks, but no sooner than the question pops in my head, her angry expression falters. Her eyes widen and trail down my front. I loosen my shoulders, slipping into the role she knows and expects. It’ll distract her, maybe even give her mind something else to cling to besides whatever the fuck has went on this morning.
I lean against the door frame and watch as her cheeks turn a rose red. She drops her eyes before attempting to slip by me. I stand in her path, forcing her body to brush against mine as she leaves. She scurries down the hall like a scared kitten, and I don’t take my eyes off of her until she rounds the corner, disappearing from my view.
I flick my eyes over to Fenris, whose cold stare is now on me. Straightening my posture before stepping all the way in, I let the door shut behind me with a loud shutter that echoes through the room as I walk toward his desk and drop onto the sofa.
I’m thankful he can’t hear the pulse that’s thrumming in my chest. He doesn’t speak, which is fine with me. I’m not really here anyway, my mind is with her. The way her scent clings to me. She probably didn’t even notice I’m in the same clothes as yesterday. I couldn’t bring myself to take them off. I want to keep her, keep her smell, pressed against me for as long as I can.
As always, Fenris has to speak and my inner monologue flatlines. “You did well yesterday. I must admit, your control over Catarina was impressive.” My mouth clenches. Praise coming from him is almost as useless as he is. The fact that it is about her, that he has the audacity to frame what I had to do as control, really pisses me off. Sure, that’s what it is to him, and probably her, but it’s more about keeping her safe from him than controlling her for him. Even if I’m the only one who gets to see it that way. I give a sharp nod, not willing to offer him anything else. I can’t afford to show him any sign of weakness with her. She can’t either.
“I have something I need you to tend to.” I don’t reply, just keep my eyes on him. He clears his throat. “I have an old friend that is searching for someone.”
“Since when do you have ‘old friends’? Come to think of it, you don’t have any friends at all.” My head whips to the door when I hear it opening. Brady walks in, and I roll my eyes before turning back to face Fenris again.
“You’re right, maybe acquaintance is a better label. Anyway, I have an acquaintance who has a son, Rylan. He sent him to Asheville to find someone who”—Brady walks over and hands Fenris an envelope—“slipped through the cracks. But, Rylan has cut all communication.”
What the hell does that even mean? “So let me get this straight. I’m supposed to track down some stranger, and when I find him, I’m supposed to do what exactly? Kidnap him?”
He raises his eyebrow and pushes back from his desk, walking over to the couch, sitting on its arm. “Who said anything about kidnapping? Not me. I simply need you to do some digging. Find out if he’s still in the area. See who his friends are, what he’s up to. Maybe you can find some information on why he’s gone dark.”
Brady speaks, even though his commentary is about as needed as fuck all. “My bet is on a girl. Some tight little?—”
“Brady, enough!” He’s cut off by Fenris. His face falls back into place. “Plus, I think it would be good for you to get away from here for a bit, don’t you? Maybe it would even help rejuvenate you. Maybe seeing how secular and filthy the world is outside of these walls, will draw you closer to god. Maybe this is just what you need to make you want to start your training. One day this will be yours, you know. You were born to lead.”
My face is blank and I know that pisses him off. He’s almost as full of shit as he is full of himself. I let my body slump and lean my head back. “What makes you think I’ll come back?
Brady shifts in the background as Fenris stands from the sofa. “Oh, Zedediah, you’ll come back.” He turns to Brady. “He’ll come back, won’t he, Brady?”
A shit-eating grin spreads across Brady’s face. “I think so, Fen. I think he’ll be wanting to come back real soon. Matter of fact, I don’t think he’ll want to leave.” He winks at me.
“Fen? You’re letting someone like him give you a pet name?” I laugh. “Oh that’s rich.” Brady takes a few steps forward. “Brady, give me one good reason to whoop your ass—on second thought, just give me a reason at all. It doesn’t even have to be good.” Brady puffs his chest like he’s still riding the high from his glory days in seventh grade.
Brady takes a step in my direction. “I’m not the one.”
I just stare at him, questioning if he’s ever had an original thought.
“Not so tough, are you?” I interrupt his sudden boost of confidence. “Honestly, Brady, I’m just shocked you can count that high.”
Fenris raises his voice. “Enough!” He closes his eyes before taking a deep breath. “Brady, you may leave.”
