I want to decline, but the unwavering support in his eyes convinces me that I can and should do otherwise. So instead, I nod and lift my soleslowlyoff the clutch until the car begins to roll forward.
‘OK, a bit more on the accelerator.’
‘I’m good with this speed,’ I say.
He chuckles, shaking his head at my very valid nerves.
‘Have you checked said speed?’ he asks.
I glance over. Six miles per hour.
‘We’re crawling,’ he says.
‘Everyone’s got to start somewhere.’
‘Move your foot,’ he says firmly. ‘I promise you that we don’t have to go past fifteen.’
We drive up the same country road, round the same bend and back around to the start again as many times as it takes me to feel comfortable and stop making shrill noises every time I have to turn a corner. Eventually his handholding becomes more of a light hover, leaving me to lead us round our empty country route. I’m a pro by the end, swivelling round our circuit with style at an impressive seventeen miles per hour and going up to second gear. That is, however, until we meet our first obstacle, an ignorant and incredibly brave pigeon walking in the road. I gasp as I spot it, panicking as my hands start to swivel and I immediately forget what a brake is. We head straight for a brick wall, but Aiden comes to the rescue, practically leaping from his seat and flinging his arms around me to steer us right back on track.
‘Brake!’
I slam my foot on the brake, the two of us lurching forward as the car starts to vibrate uncontrollably.
‘Clutch. Maddison, clutch foot down now,’ he says, clearly very panicked but still not raising his voice.
He moves the gearstick into neutral and pulls up the handbrake. I turn the key in the ignition, cutting off the engine, and we simultaneously collapse back into our seats as the car comes to a very relieving still. There’s a moment of silence, quickly followed by us both launching into fits of hysterical laughter.
‘OK, that’s enough for one day,’ I say in between my fits of giggles.
‘Agreed,’ he says, his arms still wrapped around me.
And then I glance to my side and see his face, almost touching my own, and it’s enough to instantly cut my laughter short. He grows silent as well, processing my own face, and his arms and the lack of distance between us.
‘So, what’s the verdict?’ he asks, voice shaking, but body staying put. ‘Would you do this again?’
‘With you teaching me? Anytime.’
If I’m not mistaken, I could’ve sworn that his eyes left mine for a moment to steal a fleeting glance at my lips. My stomach flutters, dips, goes through a loop at the thought of what could possibly be running through his mind. But that just wouldn’t make sense. Not for Aiden and certainly not with me.
‘You need to stop looking at me like that,’ he sighs, making no attempt to look away. ‘It’s lethal. And really unfair to your man.’
‘What man?’ I ask instantly, my confusion breaking the spell.
‘Benji. . .’ he replies. ‘Or are you guys not at the label stage yet?’
‘Oh. . . yeah.’
In all of the madness behind the wheel, I completely forgot about Benji and the hole he left me with. Forty-eight hours of tears and rock-bottom self-worth eradicated with one twenty-minute driving lesson.
‘There’s no more Benji,’ I say.
It’s the first time I’ve said or typed the words without feeling a pit form in the depths of my gut. It’s liberating for me, and apparently for Aiden too. His eyes light up, flicking from happy to mischievous in a heartbeat. My own heart quickens.
‘Is that so?’ he asks, not even bothering to mask his excitement with some sarcastic comment.
‘He ended it on Wednesday.’ I watch his reactions carefully. ‘I only found out after he blocked me.’
He tuts. ‘Coward.’ He’s happy– it’s clear. I hold my breath. ‘Why on earth would he do that?’
