He slides in close again, warmth returning as my chest touches his and his arms cradle me tight. His head dips down slightly, a trail of saliva forming on my neck, each new patch cold and uncomfortably wet.
‘I’m sorry,’ he says between soggy neck kisses. ‘Let’s not argue about this– it’s not worth losing what we have.’
He orders us pizza and we watch the rest of the movie, him frequently pausing it to fill me in on the context I’ve missed. It’s cute and domestic– an inviting change of pace and a chance to see him in a different light. His arm stays wrapped around my shoulders, squeezing me closer every time it gets ‘scary’ in the hopes that I’ll jump and let him protect me, but I hold my own. After what Aiden and I went through last week on that water ride, nothing can make me jump for the foreseeable future.
We kiss goodbye at the door at 10.18 p.m.
‘Next time I’ll be more prepared,’ he says, swinging my hand in his.
‘You’d better be,’ I reply and turn to leave, hoping I can at least be in bed by eleven.
My taxi pulls up right on time, just as I let myself out of the apartment block’s door. I get into the back and sigh, more than ready for my own cleaner and better-smelling bedroom.
The shower I take is enough to wash off the general smell of his room, and the fresh pair of pyjamas are soft enough to comfort me ever so slightly after our frustrating end. I reach for my phone to message Aiden the second I slide into bed, typing out the (massively condensed) story three times. My finger hovers over the send button, nervous and timid. I can’t do it. I hit delete and put my phone down to charge.
Spontaneous or not, this is one thing that doesn’t feel quite right to share.
Nudge 25
The Meeting
I got home OK. Thanks for a fun night x
I cringed as I sent it, but I felt like it had to be done. Then I woke up in the morning and there was no reply, and I deeply considered breaking into his house just to delete the message.
Three days later, still left with no reply, I caved and reacted to his story on Instagram. It was nothing too extreme– no fire emoji or heart eyes, just a little100to remind him that I still existed.
Still nothing. No response, no meaningless emojis back, just radio silence for two more days.
On the sixth day, I heard the buzz and flocked to my phone to find a singular sign of life. . . He’d reacted to my first message with a thumbs-up emoji.
A thumbs-up emoji. After six whole days.
Day seven and I have moved on and decided that we’re simply no more. Blowjob-Beg Benji is now a figment of my past and I have made a promise to live in the here and now.
‘Aiden!’ Pippa screams his name, barrelling towards him as Gus and I follow slowly behind.
She throws her arms around him, swaying back and forth while she traps him in a tight hug. At first, he looks startled, but then he accepts his fate, swaying along with her.
‘Long time, no see,’ he says jokingly.
It might be the funniest thing she’s ever heard in her life, the way she throws her head back and screeches. I can’t help butroll my eyes at the whole ordeal, but I make sure that it goes unnoticed. At least, it almost does. I can see Aiden catch it out of the corner of his eye and smirk. I have to smirk right back.
‘Nice dress,’ he says to me.
‘Gee, thanks,’ I reply, matching his sarcasm.
‘I was being serious.’
‘Oh. Well, thank you, then,’ I manage to say, surprised by his sincerity.
I look down at the short satin skirt of my dress, sat a risky few inches above my knee. When I first tried it on, I was ready to storm out from behind the partition and tell Anika it was too short for a workday. But she twirled me in front of the mirror and I marvelled at the way it pinched at my waist and flowed at my hips, landing perfectly mid-thigh. I hoped the stunning embroidered detailing, dotted about the fabric, would be enough to distract from the scandalous length.
Up until this moment, it has, but the longer Aiden’s eyes linger, so does another beadier, more calculated set.
‘It’s weird seeing Maddison dressed up, isn’t it? She’s always sobusinessyat work,’ Pippa says. ‘Or at least, she tries to be!’
She links his arm as she says it, tapping him playfully as if they’re sharing some private joke at my expense. He doesn’t go along with it. Instead, he looks at her, confused, dulling her bravado with one awkwardly long silence.
