Or did despair and shame flood her with the impossible desire to go back and reset her decisions so that the day Ken walked into her office, she could face him pure and unblemished?
“What is wrong with you?” she demanded of herself.
Her doctor had suggested taking a long weekend of bed rest. Today, though, Jon and Alex would get married. She needed to get up and face the day, face Ken and his family, and actually look herself in the mirror.
It took hours before she garnered the energy to get up. The cramping had eased considerably, the bleeding much less. The gray and dark skies fit her mood perfectly.
Lightheaded, she headed downstairs. Her body said to eat, but her soul rejected the idea of using energy to digest food. She settled on a bowl of plain yogurt. She curled into the corner of her couch and slowly ate it, not really tasting it, staring blankly at the dark television screen.
After the last bite, she carried the bowl into the kitchen and rinsed it out. As she went to put it in the dishwasher, it fell out of her hands. For several moments, she stared at the broken pieces on the floor. Then she left them where they fell, shutting the light off behind her.
Kenarrived at two sharp. He wore a dark blue suit with a starched white shirt and a yellow and blue striped tie. Her heart pounded when she looked at him. By the time he got there, she had managed to find the energy to pretend to be happy to see him and excited about the wedding.
“You look really nice,” she said.
He glanced at her purple lace dress and purple and blue butterfly necklace. “I could say the same,” he said.
He took her to Camila’s shop. When they walked in, the overwhelming scent of flowers made her gag. Her hand flew to her mouth, and she pinched her nose.
“I’m sorry,” she said to Ken. “The smell this morning.”
He put a hand on her elbow, concern etched in every feature. “I can take care of this.”
Camila came out of the back room carrying a box. “Hi, you two. Here you go.”
Daisy lifted her hand as she backed out of the door. She heard Ken say to Camila, “The flower smell got to her this morning.”
Clutching the corner of the building, she lost her yogurt. Long after she had nothing left in her stomach, she stood there, resting her face against the cool brick, listening to the rain hit the awning above her. Cold sweat broke out on her body, and she wondered if she should have brought her makeup bag. Annoyed at the thought of her appearance instead of the physical state of her body, she slapped her hand against the wall and straightened just as Ken pushed the door open.
He walked straight to her. “You okay?”
She pressed a shaking hand to her mouth. “I’ll be fine,” she snapped. Then she closed her eyes and took a deep breath through her nose. “I’m sorry. I’m just not feeling well today.”
“You don’t need to apologize.” He set the box in the back of the truck. “Do you want me to take you home?”
“No.” The shop door opened again, and Camila came out with a bottle of water.
“You need to sit?”
“No. I’ll be fine. Ken’s parents’ house isn’t far from here.” She took a small sip of the cool water.
“Oh, yeah. The castle,” Camila said.
With her eyes, Daisy begged Camila not to say anything about Thursday. “Yeah. Thanks. I’ll talk to you later.”
Her cousin stared at her with concern, as if she could see the dilemma in her soul. Instead of enduring the inspection, she walked to the truck and ripped open the passenger’s door. Before she could shut it, Ken was there, blocking it.
“What can I do for you?”
“I’ll be fine. Just don’t hover.” She wouldn’t meet his eyes. Finally, he gently shut the door.
After a few minutes, they arrived at his parents’ house. While he pulled into the drive, she checked her face in the visor mirror. She still looked a little pale, but at least she felt like she could function again. Ken came around the front of the truck and opened the door as a valet approached them with an umbrella. “Good afternoon, Mr. Dixon,” he said.
“Afternoon, Charles. Thanks for doing this.”
“Beats picking up trash on a jobsite today. Plus, your guests always tip us well.”
Daisy looked up at the massive castle. “I always think it looks like something out of a fairy tale.”
